i usually listen to one of my mix cds or my ipod during my 15 minute drive home from work. earlier in the week though, i’d grown tired of listening to “amazing” and “somewhere i belong” on repeat for the 82th time, so i decided to do the unfathomable…listen to the early evening (i occasionally listen to steve harvey in the mornings) urban radio station (WAMO) for the first time in approximately five months.
now, since i don’t listen to the radio or watch videos (i download all of my new music from blackgirl online and other adult message boards. no, seriously, lol. i’m soooo not playing), i wasn’t expecting to be able to immediately recognize most of the songs. what jarred and saddened me was the fact that not only had i never heard any of these songs before…i never even heard of the artists. not. one.
***and i couldnt understand sh*t any of them were saying. i felt like a white person trying to watch “the wire” for the first time***
that 17 minute listen made me feel as if i had aged 17 years overnight, lol, and was one of the many constant and blatantly perceptible signs that im getting old(er).
so, as a service from the verysmartbrothas (and ms. lizzard burr), the champ has decided to give you…
…four unmistakable signs that you’re getting old(er)
1. doing absolutely nothing…and loving it
when you’re young, if you happen to spend a weekend night in the crib, you usually spend the whole time wondering and fantasizing to death about all of the marvelous and slutty things other people your age are doing at the time. by the time i turned 26, i’d mutter “i should have stayed my ass at home” at least once during at least 75 percent of my outings.
now, i make up excuses not to go out.
“naw man, i’m good. sportcenter highlights are always better when rece davis is the anchor, and he’s scheduled to appear on tonights show. i can’t miss that sh*t”
2. waking up with random pains
a few saturdays ago as i lazily crawled out of bed, intent on possibly setting the guiness world record for the least-productive 12 hour stretch, my first step on my carpet forced me to let out one of the most bitch-ass chill-emitting screeches that a grown-ass man could muster. no, i didnt step on a dead hooker piece of glass or a nail or anything…it was just my big toe, in about as much excruciating pain as a big toe could muster. what made it even worse (read: “more funny”) was the fact that i had absolutely no idea why my big toe was hurting. none. as far as i could remember it wasnt hurting when i went to bed. plus, i hadn’t done any ass kicking recently, so i definitely hadn’t injured my toe on someones deserving hindparts.
the pain eventually went away (and by “eventually” i mean “three days later“) as mysteriously as it came, like a 2 inch long, dark brown skinned gypsy. thing is, as saddening as it is to wake up with unexplained toe pain, it still pales in comparison to…
3….injuring yourself during sex
i know that intense sex may produce a little bit of pain, soreness, and tenderness, but lets just say that father time is f*cking with you when you say to your lover “you know, i think i might need to get an MRI tomorrow. i think i tore my ACL again” after a particularly heated romp in the sack.
4. liberal, schmeberal
vsb.com aint gonna turn into lashawn barber’s corner anytime soon, but i will admit that i’ve gotten more and more conservative socially as i’ve gotten older. at this point, it actually makes me physically recoil when thinking about my years of misguided militantism and lazily lethargic liberalism. lets put it this way: the 19 year old champ, after hearing about her politics, would have given amy holmes the riot act and the heave-ho from his sack while the 29 year old champ would give it to her while she had a karl rove halloween mask taped on her back
thats it for now. slightly good people of vsb, what else would you add?
—the champ
At the ripe age of 23, I cannot attest to this “I’m older than dirt” problem. But my bumminess in general has sped up my growing up process.
I have also started finding excuses not to go out. I prefer a nite at home caking and watching a good flick. In fact, I’m sposed to be at a reggae concert with VEG right now but I couldn’t get myself to leave the house. I’s tah’d
@Luvvie, dayum you 23?
go head on then ms luvvie…..I was on some other shyt at 23 not nearly as together as you seem to have it….
@Shay-d-lady, Thanks ya kindlay. I do what I can when I can do it.
@Luvvie, I didn’t know that you were only 23. You’re so young.
@Leila, Yeah I am a young’un.
Hehe I actually just bought some footsie PJs from target. Yes, I am clearly all of 4 years old but it will serve me well in this harsh Chi winter. I will be one cozy overgrown toddler.
@Luvvie,
GIRL I Just posted that about those Footed pajamas below… shyt.. I am going to target first thang… I dont like being cold!!! GOD knew what he was doing when he sent me to this post today…
@Luvvie, get you some thermals too! Papa overit was all about the thermals lol.
@ Champ. Karl Rove? Forreal?
@overit, i agree Karl Rove is the d.e.v.i.l. i’m going to go into hiding now because he’s probably planning a smear campaign before i even get famous…lol.
@Miss Patterson, yeah, that comment did not match up with the e-profile I have created of Champ. My intuition is usually on point lol. I agree though, He Who Must Not Be Named is the d.e.v.i.l.
*hoping this e-mail address PBG gave me isn’t wrong, e-mailing Jesus cause I’m scared of the Rove*
“He Who Must Not Be Named is the d.e.v.i.l.”
i see you! lol
lol…
all i’m saying is that a person’s political views, as long as theyre reasonably, ummm, reasonable, wouldnt effect my libido. actually, it never effected my libido before, but then it was about principle.
now, f*ck principle and turn around
@overit, yes gurl. I fux w/ the thermals. I dont play with this here cold weava!
@Luvvie, yay!!!! i’m on target.com right now!!! yippee!!! nick & nora’s sock monkey!!! do you think we could convince men that this is s3xier than frederick’s of hollywood?
@Miss Patterson, LOL if you willing to show them alternative uses for the “trap door” over the a$$ im sure they will agree
@Miss Patterson, NOOO!!!!
@Miss Patterson, we can try to convince them. Guys should find a gurl in footsies cute. Shoot. lol :-p
Hehe I actually just bought some footsie PJs from target.
lol…its funny. the older you get, the more you start enjoying stuff from your youth (pj’s, soup, playing in the dirt, etc)
@The Champ, shonuff Champ. The topic on my blog today is why I am still an Overgrown Toddler and the reasons why. Which include my love of naps, flintstone gummies, PB&J, and my hate of cough syrup and vegetables.
@Luvvie, wow, i love flinstone gummies!! …or should i say the generic target brand. i think i’m gonna OD on vitamin A cuz i eat them like i’m at the movies.
@The Champ, I just recently had an opportunity to catch some playtime in the dirt. It was extremely theraputic. PLUS my dirt house was much more fly than the actual four year olds I was playing with
@Miz Nikki,
lol…i was totally being facetious with the dirt thing. but…you like it i love it and sh*t
@The Champ, umm, playing in the dirt…???
@bballmom,
@The Champ, umm, playing in the dirt…???
this was actually a euphemism. for what, you ask? good question
@The Champ,
omg… this is sooo true. I was just telling my girlfriend i’m going to go on ebay and see if I can find Thundercats, She Ra, and He Man so me and my son can watch together! I miss the Thundercats 4real… the cartoons that are out now SUCK!
@pgh muse, girllllll, don’t even start on the she-ra. i had the she-ra castle!!! thundercats was hot too.
@The Champ, oh yeah…and when i was a kid i hated HATED to get dirty. and nowadays (well, not right now, because i dont have time or money, but soon) my thing is pottery! and i get filthy, but dont even care…i just enjoy playing in the mud!
@The Champ,
playing with your…ummm, nevermind. lol
@Luvvie,
I was just at Target on Wednesday and saw those giant foot-pjs. They looked awful funny hanging up on the rack.
@Dom
I’m soo excited to get mine. I will be the warmest Chicagoan who is over the age of 2!
@Luvvie,
No need to worry. The freakin’ concert was cancelled – no updates to the website, no sign on the door, nothin.
but I stayed anyway – split my time between the two reggae bars on the street – and saw some interesting stuff.
LGG was there – doing some poorly executed, rhythmless dance moves. Will tell ya all about it lata.
wow…at 23 i was in prime party mode. me and one of my boys went out every Thursday thru Sunday. while we were in grad school. not the best decision, but youth is the only option we had to be young.
lol.
and despite being old now, i’m still out all the time, though now its for profit so i suck it up.
@Panama Jackson, wow, in grad school?!?! not the best decision at all! lmao…but hey, you made it right? no harm, no foul…
@Luvvie, I can make you feel young again
@kamakula,
“I can make you feel young again”
WORD??
oh you know it
LOL I aint old dayumit…. but I heard that as you get older the less likely that second round of bedtime aerobic is…….
@Shay-d-lady,
“I heard that as you get older the less likely that second round of bedtime aerobic is…….”
Where’d you hear that foolishness? I’m 33 and am just at the beginning of my chexual peak. One time is definitely not enough. I am looking forward to the next 10 to 15 years of the best chex ever.
@V.E.G., LOL maybe its with kids…all that sneaking and being quiet means that if you get one good one you pretty much gone call it a night….especially if its a school night…..and I aint got time to wait for his a$$ to wake back up..shyt I got bills to pay..LMAO
I’m 33 and am just at the beginning of my chexual peak. One time is definitely not enough. I am looking forward to the next 10 to 15 years of the best chex ever.
***making note to place v.e.g. in the cougar seating section during the vsb bbq***
you and these damn VSB bbq seating arrangements
@The Champ, i don’t know, she may be on mountain lion status. grr.
@The Champ, LMAO @ the cougar section!!
@The Champ,
cougar deeze
@V.E.G., LMAO!!!
@V.E.G.,
exactly!
“LOL I aint old dayumit…. but I heard that as you get older the less likely that second round of bedtime aerobic is…….”
Don’t believe the hype.
And this is coming from a current benchwarmer.
@Shay-d-lady, no you definitely heard wrong. Proof? I had to start buying batteries from Costco rather than the drugstore.
@Luvtheshoes, hmm I know women can go all night at this age s.e.xual peak and all..but men chime in are yall still all nighting on the regular?>>
@Shay-d-lady,
The good ones are.
@Shay-d-lady, I recently had this conversation with someone, she and I were talking how ridiculous our drive and stamina was at our age, 37 (no shame). The energizers have nothing on us!
@Intellectual Hedonist,
I keep telling these young girls they got nothin on me. I know tricks they can’t conceive yet and I don’t need a nap or water break.
@V.E.G.,
***adding IH to the cougar seating section***
@V.E.G., i’d like to know about these tricks!
get it in. don’t get it corrected. bear witness. until destinies collide.
I heart you, Khan. But what in the hot h*ll is u talm bout?
*guffaw*
guffaw back @ ya SouthernGirl…
@Luvvie,
LMAO… whoooo… u stoopid…my side hurts
I know I’m getting older because I hate teenagers. They’re loud and ignorant and obnoxious. I avoid public transportation when they’re getting out of school. I just want to kill them!
I try to forget about when I used to BE them. What a terror I must have been. Now that I’m older, I want to kick them in the neck.
ESPECIALLY teenage girls. Nothing is more annoying than a gaggle of 13 year old girls in too tight clothing giggling and trying to look grown. Arghhh!
OMG that is SO true…I can’t stand to see these ignant a$$ teenagers running around together, purposely being loud and obnoxious like it’s cute.
Make me wanna take off my belt and shit.
@8th Wonder, me too. I can’t stand Saturdays aka “drop your bad a*s, loud a*s, teen at the mall day”. I know I’m old when I go on rants on home training.
I am as old as dirt because:
-Ginger ale is probably my favorite carbonated beverage. Throw some cranberry juice up in there, what? That is a partay.
-A good book and food makes my heart smile
-I’m just a homebody in general
-Cream of Wheat is one of life’s gifts
-NPR and Democracy now define my mornings
-I enjoy scrapbooking and love making homemade cards for people, don’t let me find out one of yall’s birthday, I have my own logo to put on the back and errythang
-Come to think of it, except for the occasional wild out spree, I’m usually really chill and a homebody. Was I born old?
I have a ton more lol, I will be back in the morning.
@overit, if you were born old, i must’ve been born and put directly in the dirt…a cup of tea and a good book was fine with me since elementary school. my aunt commented on that one day about how i was always doing stuff like that.
i blame my grandma. lol. i must have been the only kid in elementary school drinking tea with milk, eating broadway rolls from mckenzie’s (my NO folks know what’s up) and watching one of the following: perry mason, andy griffith, colombo or patty duke. but that was our thing. i’m glad i have those memories now though. good times…
@SouthernGirl, tea with milk is that beez nees! Yeah we were def born old at the same hospital!
lmao!! i love tee with milk! and ginger ale is my shiznit too…
i aint a scrapbooker, but ive made my fair share of collages…plus i crochet. i feel like such an old lady when i crochet.
@shatani, teach me how to crochet…i bought a book for dummies and let’s just say i still didn’t get it.
miss patti, im tired now, but i will send you a couple of links tomorry. you can learn on youtube!
@shatani, teach me how to crochet…i bought a book for dummies and let’s just say i still didn’t get it.
ROTFLMAO
who needs crocheting lessons? i am a MASTER. and i will teach for free…
shat & BBMo–i crochet too!!! we should start a VSS crochet circle lmao
@overit, *hi-five*
@SouthernGirl,
I cant co sign the tea shyt.. yes I am southern and I dont like tea not even sweet tea!
but a good book and coke makes my heart sing…
in fact I was so happy when my husband worked as a manager at Good will and some old guy donated a bunch of classic novels and he bout them all for like 1.oo a piece(it included in cold blood, the great gatsby and a lot of others) as well as an original cd collection that included the first 3 whitney houston cds oh yes..im your baby tonight…..yes I think he was a gay man.. nttawwt….
@Shay-d-lady, whaaaaaa????? where you from shay d? no tea at all?!?!?!? *shock and awe* folks up here get on my nerves with this unsweetened ice tea
sh!t…i gotta ask two questions at every restaurant i go to up here. is the tea sweet and is the seafood fresh?
@Shay-d-lady, another southerner who doesn’t like sweet tea? e-fist bump!
(although you may take that right back when i tell you that, while i LOVE grits, i hate greens…)
@SouthernGirl, and watching one of the following: perry mason, andy griffith, colombo or patty duke. but that was our thing. i’m glad i have those memories now though. good times…
I still watch Perry Mason..and my grandma got me on those good westers and she loved andy griffith and bonanza and john wayne….
OMG I used to tear nick at night up watching Patty Duke.
Ahh, viva la old soul!
@8th Wonder, nick at nite and tv land are what’s up…
@8th Wonder, “meet Kathy who lives most anywhere from zanzibar to barclay square. but Patty’s only the seen the sights a girl can see from Brooklyn Heights, what a crazy pair…but they’re cousins identical cousins…” EVERYBODY!
@SouthernGirl,
“i must have been the only kid in elementary school drinking tea with milk, eating broadway rolls from mckenzie’s (my NO folks know what’s up)”
giiirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrl.
My maw maw takes teas at 3 everyday. and the only way I drink tea is with milk.
Did you say mckenzies?????????????????
@V dot, oh yes, mckenzie’s was the sh!t…before all the drama…
@V dot,
Did I hear Mckenzie’s ?????
God yes………
@SouthernGirl, I don’t know any other way to drink tea but WITH milk?? When I was little, my mom would make us drink tea with milk before school. Sometimes, I’d rebel and throw mine in the plant. Those were the days I went to school crying. Cuz I got my butt beat!
@Luvvie, lmao!
oh e-twin, you stay reading my mind! i am so with your list! i just got on that good gingerale kick too like a year ago. bombity.
oh and uhhhhh…. i’m on your e-holiday list right?? i sho do love me home made greeting cards *smiling showing all my gemmy whites*
@Gem of the Ocean, now heres the question….whats your brand?
sometimes when i want that real corrosive feel, i go with canada dry…but sometimes i want a calmer, slightly sweeter ginger ale so i go with schwepps.
i think fanta will always take me back to childhood, but i havent even seen it in the stores lately
girrrrl i feel you on your assessment of GA–i feel the same!! but only when it’s from the can. if it’s from a fountain* i can’t really tell the difference in brand. all i am aware of is that light fizzle teasing my tastebuds and palate. and all is well in the world.
*nothing beats fountain soda!! it’s the absolute best. i’d go to restaurants all day long and drink fountain ginger ale (back in the day it’d have been coca cola) if i could afford it (money and liver cells wise).
@overit – now see, I like ginger ale and tea with milk, too. But not as much as a stiff seabreaze!
-Cream of Wheat is one of life’s gifts
a woman after my own heart and sh*t
@8th Wonder, I give you expressed permission to whup my teenager’s a$$ if you EVER see her around town actin’ a fool. Go to my FB page to see her pics and what school she goes to. If she looks puzzled when you lay the smackdown on her, just tell her “SUBMARINE” and she will acquiesce.
“Submarine” used to me our secret family word when she was little. Teeheeee!
@PBG, LMAO at the mental pic of a confused mall teen getting the beatdown of a lifetime, hearing “submarine” and collapsing on the floor
@PBG, LMAO @ “submarine”.
PBGizzle, I hereby promise to lay the 5’11 amazonian smackdown on lil Tina should I ever see her actin a plum fool out in these skreets.
@8th Wonder
I swear it was completely different .When I was young (er) if I even looked at a adult sideways ,my parents would find out SOMEHOW.
@LisaAngelaPamelaRenee, word?? i hated teenagers when i WAS a teenager! theyve always sucked! lol
lmao girrrrl me too!!! when i was in HS my mom used to call me and my close girl friend (who also hated teenagers) daria and jane. she never understood why we were so turned off by normal teenage things lol.
don’t get me wrong, i enjoyed my younger years. but i wasn’t on any BS fa real fa real. i preferred going to schmoozy type parties with my parents and be told how mature i was for my age. looking back, i was really vain and always fishing for compliments. thank goodness i’m not like that any more!!
*looking at self in mirror and saying affirmations of my awesomeness*
awww, gemmie! youre so pretty! lol
i was SOOO daria!!! in fact, i still kinda am! lmao!
awww thanks shat (you know i won’t let this nickname go lol). you’re so sweet!! and you’s purty too (tho i aint never seent you, in my mind i’ve decided you are so yeah).
i feel you on the still being daria tip. altho i’m actually much less negative about life than i was in my younger days.
@Gem of the Ocean, im not particularly negative about life, but sarcasm is certainly my native tongue!
and yeah, girl, i know how you love compliments and shyt! lol
@shatani, Another Daria!!!! I’m so excited. That’s what everybody used to call me and I was proud of it.
@shatani,
darias of the world UNITE…
I was one caustic teenager. I thought all of my contemporaries were bubbleheaded fools. And I would call them as such.
we can add the Daria group in addition to the HP-fan club and crochet circle lol
@Gem of the Ocean:
Yess!!! Another group I can partake of!
“I don’t have low SELF esteem, I just have low esteem for everyone else…”
-Daria Morgendorffer
@Gem of the Ocean, lol yes. I’m in all those groups, I just started learning to crochet.
i’d have to agree with the teenagers argument. hell i can do you one better.
the other day i was talking to a woman who was 26 years old and i felt like she was just a total youngster.
thats when i knew i got old.
by the way, the teenagers in my former neighborhood liked to rob people. i liked them a lot less b/c of this reason.
girls between the ages of 12 and 16 are actually the worst people on earth…even worse than, gulp, jim jones
I couldn’t agree more.
@The Champ, Yes. When I have kids, I’m giving them up to the state when they turn 12. They r lil beezlebubs. All that angst. Who got time for that??
@The Champ,
I would agree, but my teenager just brought home a report card w/5 A’s, 3 B’s and a C. She is lookin’ pretty darn goo to me right now. This week, anyway.
Ok, just today…and its still relatively early.
@PBG,
Damn- how many subjects are kids taking nowadays? Jeez- good for her though.
hmm…you are also develop less and less tolerance for loudness… I almost lost my mind today at work because one of my co-workers was bouncing a ball on his cubicle ……I grabbed it before I knew it like some old dude who told you to stay off his grass
@Shay-d-lady, you are also develop less and less tolerance for loudness
i develop less and less tolerance for bullsh!t…
@SouthernGirl,
i develop less and less tolerance for bullsh!t…
LOL I wrote that below…..what part of the South are you from SouthernGirl?
@Shay-d-lady, New Orleans, baby!! 9th ward…
According to my friends and fam, I never had much patience (unless its children) to start with but I can’t tell you how many times the phrase “I ain’t got time for this sh!t” goes through my head on any given day. lol.
@SouthernGirl, how bout i just said that on my way home tonight!!
i go to the gas station and the nosey ass machine wants my zip code. then tells me im wrong and tells me to go to the cashier. now this muhfuh wants me to come inside. im not leaving my car keys in the car, so i have to walk back to the car. then he doesnt know what the hell is going on. then he wants my id. im like, eff it. i aint got time for this bullsh!t…it is 1am! i’ll do it in the morning!
however, i have never had a very high tolerance for BS. and when i was younger, ESPECIALLY not for kids. nowadays i deal better with kids than adults…
i go to the gas station and the nosey ass machine wants my zip code. then tells me im wrong and tells me to go to the cashier.
so, um, did you actually get your zip code wrong which is why you had to go thru all that, um, bullsh*t?? lol.
@Panama Jackson, actually no…i went to a different gas station today. put in the zip code. no issues!
“i go to the gas station and the nosey ass machine wants my zip code.”
Dont you HATE that? What the he** does the dam* thing need my zip code for? Just dispense the gas da**it!
@Dom, they need your zip code to prevent someone having a 20 dollar fillup sale on your credit card if you ever lose it..
thats another symptom of getting old.. you know realize there is no such thing as a “victimless crime” I mean I like the hook up like anybody else but I dont want stolen goods, travelers checks, identity theft although a month ago I would have been hard pressed to walk away from that 20 dollar fill up……
I think in general my tolerance has decreased subsantially as I have aged.
**loudness
**unnecesary swearing epecially use of the work kcuf
**clumps of teens in general make me twitch
@Intellectual Hedonist,
I have a low tolerance of everything you listed. One of the many reasons I only hit the mall on the weekdays, or early morning on the weekends. The mall is the one place where you can find everything on your list.
“The mall is the one place where you can find everything on your list.”
or gem of the ocean’s bedroom
actually, ALL swearing in my bedroom is necessary, esp the word fkuc
@Shay-d-lady,
I grabbed it before I knew it like some old dude who told you to stay off his grass
so basically, you’re turning into john mccain
@The Champ, LOL whateva..but that dayum thump, thump, thump of that ball while I was trying to get month end stuff done was driving me crazy…..
@Shay-d-lady, i have a co-worker, well, my manager actually, who does this as he walks down the hall. i straight wanna clip his @ss and snatch that d@mn ball sometimes…
@SouthernGirl,
“clip his ass and snatch the ball” sounds like a khia song
@The Champ,
@The Champ,
this made me laugh
Im 22, but I feel like an old woman sometimes…especially when I go home to visit my fam and friends. All my homegirls are wifed up…we honestly haven’t clubbed together since we were 19…most have kids and are in bed by 10 (like we caint even gossip on the phone hellalate like we used to)… my brother (who is 11) can out-dance me…and any new dance that comes out, he can do it after watching it once, whereas it may take me weeks to get it (if I get it)… I actually enjoy listening to npr with my mother or watching cnn in the morning… and I am cranky as hell if its after 11pm and im still awake for any reason…
Hell, even now, im in a new city and I have no desire to go out…I’ll go buy a cheap bottle of wine, have a few drinks, and go to sleep…once school starts I will become a hermit I know it
@trin-trin, When I go home, all of my homegirls are fat and got kids. I usually feel a mixture of sadness and happiness that I got away! I feel older too because they’re still on that childish BS – holding grudges from high school and whatnot.
right!!! thats why i hate going home sometimes…its like we never really graduated and that same catty bullshit is all we got to deal with!!! i caint take no more than a week at home before i start plotting escape routes…cuz i know the longer i stay the more likely i’ll be just like them (not even to knock em, it just aint for me tho)
I become a hermit in the wintertime, and going out becomes a chore.
“Go clubbing?? Hell naw! Well, unless I can wear my coat in there and sit down. Hope you don’t mind me rocking my furry winter boots”
At which point, the inviter politely (or not) says “Eff it. You ain’t going nowhere with me dressed like an Eskimo!”.
Me: *pumps tiny fists* Mission accomplished! See? We ALL win.
LOL
i hate that my bday is in the winter cuz that would be the only time im willing to go out…uthawise i’d be just like u…cuz freezing my ass off in a mini skirt and heels tryna get into some weak spot aint even worth it fa real
hallelujah for being a july baby!!! *doing the running man*
i really can’t do cold nights out either. it’s too much to bundle up for standing in the cold just to strip down inside and put it all back on to go out again. no no no. i did go clubbin ONCE in chicago in january. and while we had a great time… well…. let’s just say… i’ll never do it again lol.
@Gem of the Ocean,
I’m a July baby too! Yaaay for summer b’days!!
*hi five* next to pearls, i love me a ruby!!
@Gem of the Ocean, hey are we all Cancerians?! Miss T-Lee is too! and so is someone else on here…Southernbelle?
@PBG, Pisces are what’s good. Thanks.
*calling all Pisces to wet blanket this July party*
hallelujah for being a july baby!!! *doing the running man*
not only do we need to upgrade your slang, your dances could use an update as well
@The Champ, what’s wrong with cha-cha slide?
i see you Gemmy, one hop this time!
@trin-trin, I feel ur pain. I’m a winter baby too and I throw hate dust on all u summer folks that can have pool parties and ish. Alls I can do is have a dinner or go iceskating (which you wont find me doing b/c I hate cold. Subjecting myself to voluntary cold is just ridic).
*Sigh* Confessions of a Winter Baby
@Luvvie,
ummm…are you talking about parties for adults?
pool parties? who da hell in Chicago has a pool?
@Luvvie, bumb that I dress apropriately.. when I go to the club in the winter time they better have a dayum coat check or I need a table.. so I can put my coat down.. I rock jeans cute sweaters and high heeled boots.. shyt.. dressing like a h.o in the winter time is how you get the double pnewmonias in the a$$ according to my granny
“double pnewmonias in the a$$ ”
LOL!!!
@Intellectual Hedonist, Thats what granny said.. and I when I was like 13 and smellin myself, as they say, I told my grandma that pneumonia was a long disease and you couldnt get it in the a$$…uh she slapped the heyll out of me for sassin her…..
@Shay-d-lady, we need to sit next to each other at the VSB BBQ…
@Intellectual Hedonist,
who said you’re invited?
@Champ, at my age I dont need an invite I just show up, and you already got me on your seating chart so stop hating
lmao @ “you already got me on your seating chart so stop hating”
zing!
@trin-trin, i was living in philly for two years and never went nowhere…my friends from college came to visit me and wanted to see the liberty bell. i had NO IDEA where it was! lmao…they had to google it. and im not sure i could find it again with a gun to my head!
i was in philly for undergrad and NEVER did any touristy stuff. i aint gonna lie tho, i miss philly…maybe next time i’ll try to visit some of those places
@trin-trin, i wanna go on the duck tour, just to see if its as fun as the one in boston…lol
@shatani, let me warn you that the duck tour in Philly is the worst. I was in Philly for undergrad and I did it with a gf. I wanted my money back at the end
@shatani, No Duck tour can compare to the Boston one.
Quack Quack!
@Dom, sh!t yeah!! ive been on that (even though thats my hometown) twice….but ive been quacked at on the street at least a dozen! lol
“I actually enjoy listening to npr with my mother or watching cnn in the morning… and I am cranky as hell if its after 11pm and im still awake for any reason…
Hell, even now, im in a new city and I have no desire to go out…I’ll go buy a cheap bottle of wine, have a few drinks, and go to sleep…once school starts I will become a hermit I know it”
At 22?????? gotd*mn y’all some old ass young people.
@Panama Jackson, LOL what is NPR?
@Shay-d-lady,
national public radio
@The Champ, hmmmmm are those AM station? I dont listen to the radio much at all…cds or Ipods but when I do that means my daughter is in the car and its 1430 radio disney….I know its sad….
@Shay-d-lady, you musn’t live in DC!
@Mme. Editor-in-Chief, no ma’am.. I live in Memphis TN
@Shay-d-lady,
i dont know if its am or fm. it usually has a bunch of news and interviews and sh*t, as well as some jazz.
@Shay-d-lady,
Just the greatest gift to elitist intellectuals everywhere.
I know I am old now because I actually do contribute to my NPR station. Twice a year too!
@MsSula@Work, lol… me too and to PBS (my kids watch cartoons in the mornings.
@Panama Jackson,
“At 22?????? gotd*mn y’all some old ass young people.”
Exactly! I had a baby when I was 22 and I didn’t act that old! Geesh….LOL
@Panama Jackson,
At 22?????? gotd*mn y’all some old ass young people.
I agree. When I was 22 i was drinking… club hopping, bar hopping, and being cute. I also went to school… but school got in the way of my fabulous existence… lol. I didn’t actually grow up till i had my first son… he settled me down A LOT!!
@Panama Jackson, i know…my friends call me grandma cuz im more likely to cook and have us sit around for a sunday dinner than i am to get dressed up and go party…but in my defense, its the same ole shyt…same ole party, same ole music, same ole ppl…i just lost interest…i need a new scene
hell, i been making up reasons not to go out since undergrad. you know what, hell on that…most times i just tell ninjas i ain’t going.if i back out after saying i’m going, it’s usually cause i’m tired or just don’t feel like being bothered. i’ve never been much on the club scene. i can only take people being all up in my space in a certain way, for so long. and when i’m ready to go, I’M READY TO GO.
i can feel you on the aching pains and sh!t. i woke up with an aching back the other day that was no joke. or maybe i just need a new mattress.lol *waiting for smart @ss comments*
i think the biggest sign to me is that i now catch myself saying/thinking things like, ‘see, when i was a kid’ or ‘where the hell is yo mama?’
@SouthernGirl, i feel ya. ive never been much for clubbing….my friends have ALWAYS had to drag my @ss out kicking and screaming. even on my own birthday.
@shatani, Y’all are making me feel so good today. My friends usually have to beat down my door and throw clothes at me to get me to go out. Birthday included. But I bet you have a young fresh face just like me.
@SouthernGirl, I used to feel like i was betraying the club world by not wanting to go out. Every weekend I’d turn off my phone around 6 so I wouldnt have to tell folks that I wasnt going out. – confessions from a reformed club head
@eysqueen, Yeah, I was about to call you out because we was some going out ninjas for a little stretch there, lol, but yes you have reformed….
I don’t like the club scene either, and I’m 23. I love the way my heels look, but not the way they feel. I dont like having annoying dudes in my face all night… it’s just so much more comfortable to stay at home. The irony is, I think a lot of people force themselves to go out because they are young and it is the status quo way of having a “good time”… but when they do it, a good time is usually not had.
When I showed up to happy hour last night, my girlfriends started to clap. Now that ish is sad.
I love the way my heels look, but not the way they feel
lol…so you just buy heels and model em naked in the mirror at your crib?
I have actually done that, but no. I see them in the store and think “damn.. those are fly”… so I buy them. I then wear them, and I am full of regrets… or at least the regret of not bringing a big enough purse to carry a pair of flats.
@laylah,
I do the exact same thing. *sighs*
@laylah, i’ve done that too lol. i love the way heels look, not the way they feel.
@laylah, i am a master at finding reasonably comfortable cute heels. its the reason why i had to by stock in DSW, Zappos.com, shoetrader.com and others
i will search until i find them.
i will give up my secret brands if you ask nice
I haven’t changed that much as I’ve gotten older, except that it takes a lot more for me to get worked up about an issue……I’m 30 now and go out more than before but in a different way. I’m not into the club scene, but more grown-up spots like lounges, networking events, and jazz clubs. I get restless if I’m home even during the week.
@Leila,
i found this too. at a certain point, the “okay…whatever” button seems to get pushed more than the “i’m gonna have any type of feeling towards this” button.
i like buttons, by the way
You know you’re getting older when:
~Your idea of going out is a trip to Wal-mart instead of the club.
~You can remember carrying a pager and a cell phone was a luxory
~You keep saying – “Remember when ___(fill in the blank)”
@Shelia, “Your idea of going out is a trip to Wal-mart instead of the club.”
for me its at odd times in the middle of the night. THE WORST is when i find stuff to wear there. i would have secretly cursed my mama for buying me walmart duds to wear back in the day–but now my oldness is finding wearable things, accessories etc..totally agree.
in high school, Wal-Mart was the spot though…me and my boys would go up there at like midnight and prey on the puma-style chicks who loveded them some young boys.
plus they’d give us free fake jewelry. and starch for our Dickies. you know a southern brotha has to starch his Dickies.
@Panama Jackson, —>you know a southern brotha has to starch his Dickies.
lmao! you ain’t lyin’…creases sharp like razor blades…where you from, P? you bringing up memories and sh!t.
@SouthernGirl, i had the pleasure of going to high school in Alabama…so you know a brother was heavy duty starching his khakis…until i realized that i could actually iron my clothes on them things…i got over the starched pants real quick…plus it was just hard as hell to walk in them things….
it really wasn’t a good look, no matter how you look at it.
Heavy starch!!!! lol
@miss t-lee, STA FLO heavy starch use to have ninjas creases so sharp you would cut yourself…do people even crease their pants anymore??
@Shay-d-lady, They still do down here…certain folks only though.
You know what I mean….lol
@Panama Jackson, yeah p-fiddy you gettin alittle carried away. heavy starch?? i guess now you gonna tell me you had creases down the front.
Jesus be a dry cleaner …lord have mercy.
@Panama Jackson,
and starch for our Dickies. you know a southern brotha has to starch his Dickies.
i have neva heard of this madness.
@pgh muse, ’tis true girl. *nodding vigorously* ’tis true.
i have seen many a ninja get crazy hype about his creases…i’m even talking taking it to the dry cleaners and being pissy if its not creased enough type hype. pants could stand up of thier own accord…
“pants could stand up of thier own accord…”
Yes ma’am…lol
yep, its all true. we used to spend hours ironing creases into our pants. its why my iron game is so good now.
it was a terrible terrible fad in southern culture, much like the splits at the bottom of your jeans so they weren’t tight around the bottom…
just dont buy tapered leg jeans. somehow that simple solution didnt seem plausible at the time.
“i would have secretly cursed my mama for buying me walmart duds to wear back in the day–but now my oldness is finding wearable things, accessories etc..totally agree.”
@The Comeback Girl, me too and now it’s one of the places I shop
“~You can remember carrying a pager and a cell phone was a luxory”
Good one.
@Shelia,
~You can remember carrying a pager and a cell phone was a luxory
I remember having a pager. It was the SH*T… remember the colorful ones? The bill was like $5.00 / a month.
@pgh muse, I had one that I could change cases to match my outfits… u couldnt tell me I wasnt flyest of the fly
@Shay-d-lady,
i KNOW!!!
@pgh muse, I went to grad school with a guy who still had a pager in 2005. I’d actually hear him say to his wife, “just page me if you need anything.”
I didn’t know they still had pager service!
@Voiceofreason,
Me either!! WTF! And he’s NOT a doctor (although they use cells / blackberry’s now!?! WOW!
@pgh muse,
I never had one….
I remember asking my dad for one and he was like “Why?! Are you a ‘street pharmacist’?” Broke my li’l 14 year old heart…
@blackberry molasses,
“Why?! Are you a ’street pharmacist’?” Broke my li’l 14 year old heart…
I KNOW.. i had a job so i could get my own… but i think i was about that old when i got mine. I had this jumper with thick purple and black stripes (Cross Colors i think lol) that i couldn’t hook my pager to cause i didn’t have pockets… lol.
@pgh muse,
I didn’t get mine until I got a job as well.
My Dad was like, ” why you need a pager, you’re always here, they can call you at home”. LOL
He wasn’t lying…he had me on lock!
I AM OLD.
1. i turned down a party to watch reruns of The Office on netflix.
2. i occasionally go to work with wrist braces because my carpel tunnel acts up
3. i think i tore my rotator cuff last time i played n@ked twister. seriously, it hurts to hold the bus rail on the way to work.
4. i give people the evil eye for bringing up politics at work, especially during a meeting. (this is something my mother would do)
5. i take naps on…saturdays.
6. i eat soup.
7. i watch a lot of Court TV. my late grandmother would be proud. we spent hours watching Hawaii Five-O, and any other detective shows we could find.
see, i’m old.
@Miss Patterson, Girl let me CO SIGN your Whole dayum list
Well hell, I’m old too then.
1. I stan for The Office
2. I am slightly narcoleptic and fall asleep at random places. I wrote bout it on my blog the other day. I’m a mess.
3. Soup is THE BEST. Sick or not, I digs it. Tom Yum, Miso, Chicken Noodle…
8. i’ve fallen asleep on myself during late night clasternating. you wake up the next morning like what the…? only to realize you didn’t make it to the finish line and now your hand is numb cuz you slept on it wrong. (a friend of mine and i were both co-signing on this…it’s a 30+ thang, and my friend is a guy so it’s an equal gender opportunity phenomenon).
sheeeeiiiitttt, i’ve fallen asleep at an outcast concert.
in my defense, they weren’t on the stage yet. opening act/co- headliner, whatever didn’t show up (i wanna say it was lauryn hill–this was way back) so the dj was up there doing his thing. i looked at my girl and sho’ nuff said, wake me up when they get on the stage and took myself a nap in that loud as theatre.
this??
is a gotd*mn shame.
I’m laughing at this whole comment. Sleep at a show? WOW!!!
@miss t-lee, yup. but they weren’t on the stage yet people!!! lol.
@SouthernGirl, Okay…I GUESS I’ll leave you be then…lol
A sin AND a shame.
SouthernGirl, I’m going to the VSB Prayer Corner and send Jesus an email for you, to restore your youth and bless you with some vitamins. Somethin’ ain’t right when you fall asleep @ a concert.
@PBG, lmao!
@PBG, have I been gone that long, I didn’t know we had a prayer corner. this is in direct juxtaposition to the “OTHER” corner
@Intellectual Hedonist,
I instituted a VSB Prayer Corner, because sometimes, we just need it up in here. It’s really a cubicle w/a desk and computer so I can send the glittery Jesus emails and I have a picture of a brown, afro’d Baby Jesus hanging on the wall. Overit comes to assist and brings some Islamic flare to the situation. It’s good for all of us.
@Intellectual Hedonist, I would like to offer you my vela (candle) of la Virgin de Guadalupe (Virgin Mary) so help sanctify the space
@SouthernGirl, you rock. I went to House of Blues when N.E.R.D. came and sure did take a 15 minute nap while waiting for them to take the stage. Kindred roasted me, butI was fresh faced when they came on!
@SouthernGirl,
I was ready to take the “Southern” out of your name before you explained yourself…
Outkast = southern dopeness
@AkShone, lmao! you caint neva take the southern outta me!!
@ luvvie, thank ya kindly. that nap did me good. it was on like popcorn once they hit the stage though. i was refreshed and all hype for the rest of the night.
@ panama, whatcha want a sista to do? the dj was not that hot…
@Miss Patterson,
CTFU…Man do I have so much to look forward to.
MissP – I have so done this. It’s like, “Did I really just fall asleep on myself? Dayum!”
8. i’ve fallen asleep on myself during late night clasternating. you wake up the next morning like what the…? only to realize you didn’t make it to the finish line and now your hand is numb cuz you slept on it wrong. (a friend of mine and i were both co-signing on this…it’s a 30+ thang, and my friend is a guy so it’s an equal gender opportunity phenomenon).
whats worse is falling asleep right after you’re done…which means you didnt clean up…which means you wake up feeling like your crotch was dipped in rubber cement
“whats worse is falling asleep right after you’re done…which means you didnt clean up…which means you wake up feeling like your crotch was dipped in rubber cement”
That visual REALLY just messed up my morning hot chocolate
@The Champ, rubber cement?! lmao!!
CALL EMS! I’M choking!
“which means you wake up feeling like your crotch was dipped in rubber cement”
This is so unfortunate.
@Miss Patterson, I am sooo happy to hear I am not the only one who has done this. My younger girlfriends looked at me like I was crazy when we were talking about this. I told them just wait til you in your 30′s and see what happens.
girl i’m not what i’d consider “old” (tho too damn old for games and nonsense, that’s for sure) but i am guilty of half your list! lol esp #1 which i’ve done more than once. i now own seasons 1, 2 & 4 (don’t ask about 3)
“i now own seasons 1, 2 & 4 (don’t ask about 3)”
season 3…no need to explain.
“5. i take naps on…saturdays”
You shol’ right. Especially if I’m going out later…lol
don’t sleep on court tv. what about the first 48? anyone? anyone?
@laylah, “what about the first 48? anyone? anyone?”
yep, watch that too. it’s like 3 stories in 1!
@laylah,
I watch that show religiously. I am a BIG FAN of all the “murder/death/kill” TV shows, especially the reality ones.
Those fake-young a$$ gangstas STAY snitchin’ on that show! Those homicide detectives start talking years and those boys start telling everything they’ve seen and heard since birth. And the ones that start crying for their Mama’s are the ones that really get me! Woooo!
I love that show.
@PBG,
there was one fool who actually snitched on himself and didn’t realize it. the victim had died from a hit and run… actually a hit and reverse and hit again, then run. when the detectives came to his house, before asking him anything he says “i couldn’t have done anything that night. i don’t even have a car.”
foolishness.
@laylah,
I remember him. He was big as H3ll and had a perm. Tried to give the beauty salon as his alibi.
@PBG,
yes! and had those long ass fingernails. yuckity yuck yuck.
@laylah, are yall talking about the one where he dragged the lady down the street? he started the episode with a big a$$ fro and then by the end he had gotten it permed??? that was a mess… he had no remorse he was just like… well she gone now
@Shay-d-lady,
yes, that’s the one. CM was trying to question him and he’s like “she’s gone baby”…
damn those fat pimps.
@laylah,
“damn those fat pimps.”
*dead*
@PBG, Those fake-young a$$ gangstas STAY snitchin’ on that show! Those homicide detectives start talking years and those boys start telling everything they’ve seen and heard since birth. And the ones that start crying for their Mama’s are the ones that really get me! Woooo!
I love that show.
I LOVE FIRST 48 and I am like dang have these weak a$$ snitchin mo fos never heard of going to trial, asking for an attorney? dayum..I mean they dont use no CSI shyt, fingerprints or nothing they just bring they a$$es in there and be like..now we know you did the shyt..and that Caroline Mason is a mess.. I love her she working homicide cases in flip flops with a big a$$ flower on them, capri pants a see through shirt and a long a$$ stripper weave with chinese bangs… I love the M baby….
@Shay-d-lady,
Caroline Mason is my girl!! She’s my favorite detective on the show.
@PBG,
she’s my fave too, even though she looks like a blowfish.
@laylah,
OMG! She does! LMAO!!
“what about the first 48?”
This show (I love it though) single-handedly killed tourism in my home town of Memphis, TN. When I tell people I’m from there, they look at me like a Vietnam vet! On some, “You made it out of there alive?!?!”
@AkShone, yeah I was having a conversation with this dude from Memphis once and I was on some yo, if I ever come visit can I borrow your kevlar vest and a piece. I will say though, that female Detective is fly as h3ll, she is no joke, putting on her lipstick before going to a crime scene. lol
@Intellectual Hedonist,
What’s funny is my cousin has been on that show (he’s a SWAT officer) and he says she carries around signed 8×10′s to give people when they notice her from the show, lol…ahhh, fame.
@AkShone, i just had a layover in Memphis, TN. Just enough time for barbeque. I went to Interstate BBQ & Restaurant and had a beef bologna pork bbq sandwich with cole slaw (which i normally hate) slathered in bbq sauce. this is all to say that my experience of Memphis involved food, so i like the city. p.s.- i’m a glutton.
Memphis = Best BBQ…in. the. world.
and I don’t even eat pork anymore. You gotta go in July, they have a BBQ fest where people literally come from all over the world for the contest! What you know about some dudes from Bangladesh comin’ to Q it up and show you how they do it on the other side of the world!
@AkShone, i heard about that festival. mmm…pork.
@AkShone,
I may have to agree with this. I was in the airport during a lay over in Memphis and got some ribs while I waited. I was like DAMN!! If these shyts is this good in the AIRPORT, I know they must be crazy tasty in da hood.
@Miss Patterson, you chose the right spot to Interstate is good shyt…. so is A&R but I think they might be owned by the same peeps…and Akshone I have never been to the july BBQ fest but the one they have during Memphis in May is off the chain and they usually have some really good concerts going on at the same time…I love my city…..
Shay, I think you’re correct…Memphis in May, right.
It’s been a minute, I usually don’t get back home until the holidays.
@laylah, First 48 is my ish for real…
@Miss Patterson,
I co-sign everything, especially #1 and #7. I hate missing my shows when I go out, especially SNL during the Palin era. And I thrive on old re-runs of Matlock and Murder She Wrote.
@Miss Patterson, ” i take naps on…saturdays.”
I remember being able to stay up 2 days straight and still feel like the energizer bunny…those days are long gone….lol
I guess I am getting old
I prefer my glasses to contacts
I wear actual pajamas to bed( and soon as I find me some adult footed joints its on! and use houseshoes..(bedroom slippers for those not from the house)
Instead of the latest thrillers my reading list include
Books about properly diversifying my 401 k and IRA
Home Deocorating and Gardening
I have way less patience for bullshyt.. I tend to just say what the f!ck I feel and be done with it….but and maybe this is because I am a mother I also am starting to feel more compassion for people..I can almost be guilted into shyt now whereas before I didnt give a dayum………..
@Shay-d-lady, i wish they would make those pajamas with the feet in them for adults. i’m for real…i used to love those things as a kid. nostalgia about childlike things…yet another sign.
They got em, Pattiecakes. Target!!!!
@Luvvie, am I the only who might spend more money on pj’s than regular clothes? I’m a sucka for some pj’s boy.
@overit, no you’re not alone. i’m a sucker for pj’s too!
“I’m a sucka for some pj’s boy.”
if i were panama, i’d have a field day with this statement. i’m not panama though, so i wont
@The Champ, whateva!
PajamaCity.com
@R’Tyst, i’ve just bookmarked this site.
just stop it.
@Panama Jackson, you’re just jealous because the site isn’t called panamacity.com. hey did you know they have adult drop seat pjs for men too? AND WITH feet in them! check it out, your girl will love it. *snicker*
no. she won’t.
@R’Tyst, I just went on that site, and I believe, no. I KNOW you just changed my life. I owe you a bowl of jollof rice for your good deed.
@Luvvie, Imma hold you to that.
@Shay-d-lady, “Instead of the latest thrillers my reading list include
Books about properly diversifying my 401 k and IRA”
You made me think about reading my mom’s AARP magazine…lol but seriously some of those articles are interesting.
I knew I was getting older when I got more realistic about what I want from a mate. Eff all these silly requirements and ish, I finally know exactly what’s important to me, and that’s what I’m truly looking for.
Also, I rarely fuss over dumb ish anymore. I just don’t understand why certain things matter…I got bills to pay.
@8th Wonder,
I got bills to pay.
you know you old when you use this as a logical excuse for EVERYTHING…LMAO
He.ll Naw I didnt watch Oprah… I got bills to pay…
*snicker* i ain’t watching no oprah…that’s gon’ run my bill up. i don’t care if you brushing your teeth, gon’ have my water bill sky high…
@SouthernGirl,
Thats my granny right there southern girl.. i remember she wouldnt let us turn the tv up for fear her light bill was going to be too high….LOL true story my grandma had that cable box, the wood one with the little white ticker that only went up to channel 36 until 1998. She didnt even know they got rid of it until the changed lifetime or something and she called to say she couldnt get it. They sent a tech out not understanding what she meant when she said her t.v. wouldnt “reach it” (i think the new channel was 45)… they ended up giving her a digital box and comping her cause she acted a fool cause she said she didnt ask for no dayum digi cable and she didnt want it but she wanted the same channels she been paying for.. that box had been out of date for like 10 years at that point…she the only woman I know that pays 20 dollars for digital cable…
@Shay-d-lady,
Damn $20…umm tell your grandma to holla at me. My cable company is setting up their own digital signal and everyone has to have a converter box. Even if you have cable you still have to have one for “each tv.”
@R’Tyst, now they let her a$$ know that when the digital conversion happens she gotta pay what she weigh… the old floor model definitely wont support a digital signal alone
LMAO
@Shay-d-lady,she the only woman I know that pays 20 dollars for digital cable…
lmao…them grandma’s are a trip…
@SouthernGirl, grandmas? shoot, thats my mom…she been gettin cable a la carte for years. im like, how you got 11 dollar cable??? what does that even include?!?!
mama: local channels, lifetime and soapnet.
me: *blank stare*
@shatani, ok, that just makes it even funnier. lol.
LOL it’s so true, though.
Matter of fact, let me stop effin around on vsb all hours of the night…If I can’t wake up for work, I can’t pay these bills, and ain’t nothin going on but the rent, na’mean?
@8th Wonder, if i had an actual income i would be right behind ya! lol
co-sign, i’m out. contrary to the hours i put in, im not vsb moderator and shyt.
Also, I rarely fuss over dumb ish anymore. I just don’t understand why certain things matter…I got bills to pay.
^^^this is sooo me. just over the summer, i lost all energy to fight over stupid shit. i honestly dont care anymore.
Sigh, I think I was born being realistic about what I want from a mate, which is why I’ve told so many dudes to kindly keep it moving. That has been one big a*s catch-22, I won’t even lie lol. Don’t ever be born like “he fine, but he aint serious about life”. That was baby overit, co*k blocking since birth.
“baby overit, co*k blocking since birth.”
lmao!
ive always known, i think…ive just been trying to ignore it for a long time. im over that now.
i’m so with you on this e-twinny twin. lol
you also know you getting old when you need at least 24 hour notice to go out because you have to properly plan for a nap before the club?
you also have like a 3 hour club limit which means that you have to either be the driver or meet your friends there…..
you wouldnt dream of seeing the 12 midnight show….
@Shay-d-lady, i love the club nap. i thought i invented the club nap. what’s funnier is that i call it the club nap and i haven’t been to a club since like….(i’ll get back to you on that) i also love this new @sign feature in the reply comments box. it’s the little things when you’re old…
@Miss Patterson, I LOVE the new feature too.. i thought it was something I did.. LOL
but yeah the club nap is my shyt.. I need to lay down from at least 7-9 before i start the getting ready process which involves choosing an outfit then changing… and having 2 or 3 dranks before walking out the door…
Also.. I dont like to go to clubs without a reserved table.. Im old I need to be able to sit down after that 96 scrub the ground, bang bang, skeet skeet, let me bang mix is over….especially if they threw luke Scarred or that Birthday joint up in the mix……….in fact I need a seat and a vodka+redbull
“you wouldnt dream of seeing the 12 midnight show….”
I just got back from the midnight show, I hadn’t been to a midnight show in YEARS. I don’t even know how I’m still up, I know I’m going to be paying for it tomorrow
Nap before the club? Wow, I really HAVE been old my whole life. I did that my freshman year of college!
@Voiceofreason,
the pre-party nap ain’t old… its common sense. if i’ma be rockin till the sun comes up, i need SOME kinda sleep.
but now, the pre-party nap has become “i was knocked the h3ll out last night’
@Shay-d-lady, There are pictures of me on Facebook asleep in the club. I’m known for it. Esp. when alcohol’s in the system. I either get hyped or I get sleepy. Too often, its the sleep.
@Luvvie, it. Esp. when alcohol’s in the system. I either get hyped or I get sleepy. Too often, its the sleep.
LOL yeah you have to drink PAST the sleepiness to get to the hype ness….I discovered that. I went to this club downtown and they had these big I dont want to say beds but you know what i am saying instead of “tables”…..LOL I curled up in the corner after a prolonged gangsta walk mix and went straight to sleep… I mean hard, like I woke up confused didnt know where I was at…..I remember thinking this must be what alzhiemers feels like..
@Shay-d-lady, “you also know you getting old when you need at least 24 hour notice to go out because you have to properly plan for a nap before the club?”
LOL…I used to leave for the club at midnight…now if I’m not out of the house by 9 pm you can forget me going anywhere—and that includes movies, house party…whatever…I need to be out of the house by 9 or I’ll be canceling.
You know you’re getting old when all the dumb stuff you did as a kid irritates the hell out of you. When you can’t stand to be around younger people and when they do dumb stuff. Then the older lady sitting across from you makes eye contact with you and you both shake your heads.
You know you’re getting older when at 28 your medicine cabinet starts to have things that resemble your grandma’s. Aches and pain…got those too. My joints have popped for as long as I can remember, but now they ache too. I can make a list of all the things bothering me right at this moment, but then that means that I will actually have to pay them attention.
You know you’re getting old when you find yourself “happily crocheting while watching a movie, drinking a cup of peppermint tea with IcyHot smeared all over your back at 9:30 on a Saturday night.” Yes I did this and was extremely relaxed.
You know you’re getting old when you say things like “I remember when this Oatmeal Raisin cookie was called an Oatmeal Raisin Bar and in the yellow and blue Tastykake wrapper. Damn these are 75 cents!!! I remember when they were 4 for $1.oo” or “Dag they don’t make them like they use to.”
@R’Tyst,irritates the hell out of you. When you can’t stand to be around younger people and when they do dumb stuff. Then the older lady sitting across from you makes eye contact with you and you both shake your heads.
LOL I did this tonight while some bad a$$ little kid was ripping and running down the hall at my daughters open house.. one of the teachers looked at me and her eyes silently thanked me for my well mannered child….
oh and
I looked in my medicine cabinet and saw green alcohol and epsom salt… yeah im getting old
“Then the older lady sitting across from you makes eye contact with you and you both shake your heads.”
This happens on the metro all the time. Not on the blue and orange lines either. That red, green and yellow line be on that bullsh**. DC ppl know what i’m talking about.
now ill admit the Green line has had me shaking my head at folks too much, and the Red line on the NE side…
but admittedly, its because i saw a dude walking up and down the train actually intentionally scaring the white people.
i couldn’t help but shake my head.
@Panama Jackson,
PeeJay, I’m gettin’ tired of you talkin’ junk about Norfeas!! First my grocery stores and now my precious Red Line??
Just stop!
This reminds me of the infamous “Solja-girl” incident on the MARTA here in ATL earlier this year. I was like, “Dammit, that’s somebody’s grandmomma!!!…and these weak dudes didn’t come to her defense!
@AkShone, I had the same response. Like, none of them kats stood up to help that lady…
@AkShone, I was so mad about that! I was waiting for someone to come to grandmomma’s defense. I hated everyone on that d*mn bus!
@AkShone,
Yeah, I was shocked that cats didn’t do anything about that either. I’m even more surprised that a local Atlanta group hasn’t sampled her voice and incorporated into a smash, major, “knuck if you buck”, type of hit record.
Damn, why did Crime Mob have to break up?? *drops head*
@Shay-d-lady, I have also been found on occasion politely telling some misbehaving child “hey don’t do that, that ain’t right.” Sometimes I’ll say out loud when a kid is acting up “somebody needs to beat his ass.”
@R’Tyst, hey don’t do that, that ain’t right.” Sometimes I’ll say out loud when a kid is acting up “somebody needs to beat his ass.”
[I do that shyt too..but then I grew up with a momma that thought she was momma of the world..she would be like tell them YO momma said.. I was like momma the light bill place dont care about you being my momma….LOL but she use to cuss random kids out..what the he.ll you doing? Get yo a$$ over there where yo momma at….I find myself doing this as well..which is why I stay away from places like Chuckie Cheese.. I always end up about to fight some chick cause her fat a$$ 11 year old child hogging up the kiddie rides cause his momma to cheap to have his birthday party somewhere more age appropriate…
@R’Tyst, icyhot is the bomb. matter of fact, i could use some of that right now. i also like vick’s vapor rub.
@Miss Patterson, is it good for my carpal tunnel? LMAO to add I also have tendinitis in both elbows and shoulders…..
lmao @ icyhot. i wont lie tho, i could use some now too. back pains are a beast. i’m not looking forward to the ones induced by pregnancy (which is likely a looooong ways away).
@Miss Patterson, I forgot about vics. My grandma use to rub that stuff all over us, rub it in our noses, and if we were congested she made us swallow some.
The vicks! Wow we had rub it in our noses and on our chests when we got sick…lol
@miss t-lee, LOL not the vics sav….lMAO that shyt will open sinuses on a whale…you just all sticky and spicy smelling….
Yep!!!
I’m LOL at you. You spelled it just the way my MawMaw pronounces it!!!!
@R’Tyst, she made you swallow it? hahahahaha…i dare anyone! anyone!!!
@R’Tyst, “You know you’re getting old when you find yourself “happily crocheting while watching a movie, drinking a cup of peppermint tea with IcyHot smeared all over your back at 9:30 on a Saturday night.” Yes I did this and was extremely relaxed. ”
like the old folks say in church…”MY GOD”
this is OLLLLLLLLD yo..lol
Ah man, my 32nd birthday is Sunday so you must be f*ckin’ wit’ me by doing the old folk’s post now bruh, huh? lol.
Anyhow, my list would go a little somethin’ like this:
1. Unless I’m in a extremely jovial mood, I do not bump my music loud. Long gone are the days of beatin’ up the block, advertising to everyone that you got that new shyt.
2. I don’t spend money on frivolous materialistic shyt. I just don’t see the value.
3. The History Channel and documentaries about the most irrelevant things will keep me entertained for hours at a time.
4. I NEVER go to a “black” movie in a “black” movie theatre on the first weekend it comes out. A matinee during the week is idea.
5. Piggy-backing off of number 4, I don’t go to the mall on the weekend. Not really a mall cat anyway, but definitely stay clear away from it on the weekend.
6. To Miss Patty and Luvvie, I high fives you both on the soup comment. I’m an avid soup fan…be me sick or well.
7. I refer to blackberry’s and other smart phones as “pagers” and not actual phones. I may even slip and say, “page me later”, as oppose to “text” or “email”.
8. The nights that I’m out hangin’ pass 2am throughout an entire year can definitely be counted on two hands. Even if I ain’t gotta be up all early, that shyt’s just old to me now.
9. I love my “ME” time so I’d prefer to spend quality great time with the homies as oppose to a large quantity of good times. The better the times are, I don’t feel we have to hook up every weekend and whatnot.
10. Sleep is the Best.Thing.Ever.
That is all.
Everybody pop a bottle or twist a cap on Sunday for ya boy.
@Monk,
10. Sleep is the Best.Thing.Ever.
OH my GAWD..you must have kids…..LOL .. I would prefer sleep to ALMOST any other activity in the world..and I can always go back to sleep.. I mean sometimes I dream about sleep. We went to the taste of Chicago festival about 2 years ago…no lie the food was good, nice people but the best part was that dayum bed at the Sheraton five (maybe four?) points hotel near the Ohare airport I think… OH my Dayum…
10. Sleep is the Best.Thing.Ever.
Yessir!!!!
Happy Early B-Day Monk!
happy early birthday homeboy…
pop champagne.
@Monk, Happy Birthday, Mr. Scorpio [insert cougar roar]
@Monk,
Happy Birthday Man!
@Monk,
happy early birthday and sh*t, and i’m also co-signing your entire list
Happy early birthday, Monk!!!
*Taking a swig of Bailey’s in your honor*
@Luvvie,
You would take a swig of Bailey’s if I told you it was my cat’s birthday, wouldn’t you?? Tell da troof, woman!!
@Monk,
I am soooo w/you on #’s 3 &10.
I watched a documentary on Lee Atwater the other night that me completely engrossed. And that joint on the telephone was the bomb too.
And sleep…OMG. No words. Best thing ever invented by God and Jesus.
@PBG,
I watched a documentary on Lee Atwater the other night that me completely engrossed.”
OH snap!!! I watched than one too!!!
I co-sign this list & Feliz cumpleaños…and sh!t.
@Monk,
Happy Early Birthday. And that list is REAL!!!
@Monk, 3, 4, 8, 10
and I will pop a bottle of wine, red, for you and have a glass in your honor on Sunday
@Monk, Happy Birthday.
“I don’t spend money on frivolous materialistic…”
I can feel you on this one. The stuff that used to matter don’t any more.
Happy Birthday Monk! …will pour a il down my throat in honor of you homey.
salute!
@Monk,
Happy Birfay!
and your list resonates SOUNDLY with me.
@Monk, Happy Bday! Get a good night’s rest then pop that bottle lol.
@Monk, i be skimmin around like a mug..how i miss dis..happy bday..i would write you a song but i gotta get back to work.
i missed this earlier too. anyway…
¡FELIZ CUMPLEAÑOS! (in advance)
@ALL,
Thanks a hundred thousand trillion for the birthday wishes and shyt. Y’all some cool muthafathas…
@Monk, dang im all late!
happy birthday, monk!
dang, based on #1 alone i been old for at least a decade and a half! i love doing nothing…i especially love doing nothing when i actually have nothing to do! these days, doing nothing is a tense and guilt-ridden time cuz i got isht to do….
hmmm, signs youre getting old….how bout whenever you get up from a seated position you make that old man groan. not particular reason. youre not in any pain or anything. you just find yourself makin a noise when you get up.
i stay making uncomfortable sounds when i get up from being in one position for too long. going to the gym on a regular basis has helped significantly (p<0.001) reduce these sounds. i haven’t been to the gym in a week and all of a sudden these groans have creeped back up with every getting up movement lol. so sad. very very sad.
@Gem of the Ocean,
going to the gym on a regular basis has helped significantly (p<0.001) reduce these sounds
the epidemiologist in me hearts you right now. i saw that and got the biggest grin on my face.
i am a dork. i accept it.
lol i figured you pick up on that. good job!
i’m still pretty young (24), but i know that i’m getting older because the “you look like a child” comments that used to get an eye-roll now get an emphatic “and i thank ya!”
i have given myself a bed time. and imposed a “do not call me after 11pm” rule.
calling after midnight just to say what’s up? get cussed out.
@charli skipper, the “you look like a child” comments that used to get an eye-roll now get an emphatic “and i thank ya!”
That’s how I feel at getting my ID checked. I’m 30 and got my ID checked like 4 times in the past 2 weeks. One guy told me that he did not believe my age, he thought I was 21. I was having a crappy day, but that brought a big smile to my face…
@charli skipper,
“calling after midnight just to say what’s up? get cussed out.”
I concur.
The only person who should even THINK about calling me that late at night is Jesus. And even He’d better tellin’ me that He’s on His way back.
For a cat that started going gray @ 22 and would rather eat garbage than feign enthusiasm for new “urban” radio hits, this gettin’ old business ain’t nothing new….. I’m more salty that you’re blatantly giving up the music connects to the masses — that shit ‘sposed to be like Fight Club bruh.
I’m more salty that you’re blatantly giving up the music connects to the masses — that shit ’sposed to be like Fight Club bruh.
my bad, man. i probably deserve a demerit for that sh*t
Yeah you do, I wasn’t gonna say nothin’
ooh also, a couple years ago, a night out did not even get started until midnight. like, seriously, at 11:45, i would be just deciding what to wear. but now, if you tryin to hook up after 9, um….yeah, i’m probably not gonna be able to make it. but yall have fun.
i’m so with you on this charli. if i’m not already out and about by 9:30p, it’s probably a wrap. you’re welcome to come chill on the couch with me while i catch up on my foreign flick netflix joints, and i’ll make some hot chocolate and cookies but that’s about as much energy as i can muster up past 11p lol.
word! its like pulling teeth to get me to leave the house when its dark. and sucks for my friends cuz its dark at like 5 now! lmao! i have to really really want to do that something (like go see Role Models last night at 7:45) to get me to leave the house after dark…
@Gem of the Ocean,co-sign all on that. I need to be out by 9, if I’m not, the chances of me sacrificing the sweats for some heels is slim.
except i’m going out TONIGHT!!! woo hoo!!
@Gem of the Ocean,
Is there anything good going on in pgh tonight? Or is it just the typical stuff?
@Voiceofreason,
I’ll look into this 4 u and hit u back in a minute….
@pgh muse,
Good lookin’ out.
@Voiceofreason,
i’m having a cooking contest tonight at my apartment if you’re interested. basically, i’m inviting people to come, make lots of food, and then allow me to eat it.
@The Champ,
You sure you want me to participate? Men can’t help but stick around me after I cook for them. LOL!
@The Champ,
Did u know that the WHOLE Wu Tang CLan is going to be @ Mr. Smalls on December 26th?
@Voiceofreason,
hey voice of reason… i found a couple of things going on. Eddie Griffin is @ the improv 2nite, the Joy Ikefull Band are performing @ Pgh Pub theatre http://www.joyike.com
There’s an interesting looking Poetry Slam happening @ Godfrey’s in the strip… and then there’s the regular clubs and ish… hope this helps a little.
@pgh muse, wow, who would have thought there would be ANYthing going on in the burgh…
lmao, jk! love yall…
lol this happened to me and my girls recently this summer, we called ourselves taking a nap at 8pm and getting up to get ready to go out at 10pm…we got ready alright. ready for bed. nighty night
lmao…yeah, when the disco nap turns into bedtime you know things have changed!
Amen! If I’m still sitting on the couch at 10, we ain’t making it. Makes “Free before 11″ all that more enticing…
@Luvtheshoes, Amen! If I’m still sitting on the couch at 10, we ain’t making it. Makes “Free before 11? all that more enticing…
see I still go late.. I dont ever get in free..LOL 1 usually have a table so I aint in a rush and 2 I have a 2-3 hour max club limit..and I have to factor in time enough for that nap…my club arrival time is about 11:30 ish-12
nothing good has/will come from WAMO. WAMO-sponsored club nights represent all things wrong in the black community. *smh*
altho i will say listening to the callers on the radio allows me to practice/immitate/make fun of the strong urban pittsburgh accent. with those strong o’s and ah’s. you can’t get that kinda practice anywhere else. and i ‘purciate it.
@Gem of the Ocean, LMAO!! are yinz still gahn tah d.c.? let me know wurr ur stay’n at.
lmao @ yinz!! oooooooh nooooooo *in best pgh accent*
yeah girl!! we head out w/ Goldie tomorrow a.m. i’m staying in alexandria but conferencing in dc (which means i’ll be in dc 90% of each day lol).
i’ve already made plans to get up with the 8th wondra and my e-twin overit!!! any other DC VSB-ers holla at ya girlz!!!! *sarah palin wink*
@Gem of the Ocean, you betcha! except i’m not gahn ta d.c. tool janyary. so, make plans to be at the VSS (hee, hee) karaoke night. I’ll be there dare from dat fridee to that wensdee. btw, talking in pgh-ese hurts my mouth…
@Miss Patterson, I plan to be in DC for the presidential swearing in myself………anybody know of some hotels I can stay in…….I aint had a dayum bit of luck
@Shay-d-lady, i say we rent out p-money’s garage. btw, most hotels and hostels are booked in dc and/or overpriced. check VA.
@Miss Patterson, what parts of VA? ya know Ise a southern gal..and dont know nothin about them parts up yonder…
hmm…i have a garage?
i’ll see you gals in jan!!! yaaaaay *clapping*
@Gem of the Ocean, im planning to go for the inaguration but im pretty sure theres nowhere to stay in DC. i might go to my auntie’s house afterward…she lives in dover
girl please. i’m staying with my sis in alexandria. which is where i am right now!!!
@Gem of the Ocean, what time do u go to sleep?
I am staying in Maryland for inaugural weekend, friday through Wed
“you betcha! except i’m not gahn ta d.c. tool janyary. so, make plans to be at the VSS (hee, hee) karaoke night. I’ll be there dare from dat fridee to that wensdee. btw, talking in pgh-ese hurts my mouth…”
lol…you’re so wrong for this entire comment. btw, you probably should have typed “mi mouf” for the whole pittsburghese effect
@Gem of the Ocean,
I know ya’ll better contact me! All my info is on my FB page, no excuses!!
@Miss Patterson & Gem,
lmao @ yinz!! oooooooh nooooooo *in best pgh accent”
ya’ll r silly. Gem, Champers, ne pgh VSBers… i have some coworkers hosting a western ho-down caberet tomorrow nite…let me know if you wanna slide.
i’m in the dc urrrrea (not to be confused with urea the chemical) so i won’t be able to make it
but keep me posted on any other pgh shin digs goings on.
@Gem of the Ocean,
Awww Gem!!!
It’s ok… hope you’re haven fun! Have some for me… Hopefully the ho-down will be a knee slappin’, high steppin, boot scootin’ good time 
@Gem of the Ocean,
So true. You know an establishment is going down hill when they have WAMO night. Before you know it metal detectors are gettin thrown up and they’re serving dolluh drinks.
lmao oh yes. i spent halloween at privilege which was WAMO night. *hangs head in shame* i never felt so violated after going through the metal detectors and then being overly patted down by “Mrs. Officer”. it was my girl’s bday and she wanted to stay. *smh* the things i do for my friends
@Gem of the Ocean,
I ALMOST went there Halloween night (had my car parked and everything), but my cousin looked at the line before I met her and told me not to bother to go in. Mrs. Officer is no joke with the pat down (I’m guilty, I’ve been there after WAMO took over). She makes you feel down right violated.
LMAO. I cannot believe I forgot to address your #2. Thanks Champ for making me feel better.
For a whole week in August I swear I felt like a patient on House. Ever since I read the Hot Zone, I have been waiting for the CDC to report an Ebola outbreak. I might be a border line hypochondriac. Anyways, I woke up and my right index finger was red, hot and swollen. It looked like I slammed it in a door! I was so shook, and that whole week I prayed little brown baby Jesus would take the wheel because this was it. This was how the saga of Overit would end! I would die of a swollen finger that was really the first case in 50 years of the Black squirrelitis epidemic of 1817.
It eventually went away, but what was that???
lmao @ sooooo many things in this post…
-“I felt like a patient on House”
-“I have been waiting for the CDC to report an Ebola outbreak”
-“I prayed little brown baby Jesus would take the wheel because this was it” (take the wheel though?? lol)
-I would die of a swollen finger that was really the first case in 50 years of the Black squirrelitis epidemic of 1817
you are a fool, e-twin!!!!
but fa real fa real, i always have unrealistic health fears. in college, i had some weird illness where i was sick at random hours of the day. migraine one day, stomach virus the next, lactose intolerance another, and paper cuts somewhere in between (ok not an illness, but i’d get multiple cuts at once all over my hands, and it hurt real bad!). i called my mom and told her i thought i had west nile virus. why?? i have no idea. i don’t even know the symptoms of west nile. but that’s the disease i chose. and my mom was like “oh my god! go to the hospital! get your blood drawn and make sure you get some medicine”. really mom?? really?? you believed for real i had west nile?? and this is why i have health issues to this day. and to think she married a physician once upon a time…. *smh* special. just touched. by an angel. of unreasonableness.
@Gem of the Ocean,
LOL almost 2 years ago I kept having a recurring a$$ sinus infection. at first it was the flu, then sinus.. imean I literally was on antibiotics for almost 2 months. finally the symptoms passed but I was so tired.I Mean I could barely get out of bed I thought I had cancer. I thought I was dying and took out all this dayum insurance life insurance, death and dismemberment, mortgage protection upped my 401 k contribution to 10 percent etc etc…. I went to the doctor and she drew a ton of blood to run tests.. I was so scared I almost passed out when she called me back for my results…..I had mono..womp womp… working with those nasty a$$ day care kids…andmy husband almost laughed himself into a dayum asthma attack
lmao!! i knew you wouldn’t disappoint on the story tip, shay-d. hilarious!!
and yeah, if you’re real sick with flu/sinus infection like symptoms for over 2 weeks, you’ve likely got mono. i used to stay sick and my labmates would always tell me i had mono and then make up rude stories about how i got it lol. but it was just one virus after another, a result of poor immune system and nasty/germy co-workers. now that my immune system is much stronger (thanks to exercise and emergen-c) i stay bug free!
@Shay-d-lady, im mad hubby almost met his demise over you being on your death recliner! lmao!
the way you cuss also tells your age.. the older you are the more curse words you tend to string toghether… 19 a stubbed toe= Shyt!!!!, at 24 a stubbed toe=gotdayumit at somewhere around 30 and up stubed toe=gotdayum,motherf!cka ain that some bullshyt??? and might require that you miss work the next day….
@Shay-d-lady, lol. that’s true. my momma will put curse words in places that i never would have imagined.
and i quote: “d#mn that trollop a*s b@tch. hell.”
@charli skipper, my mother and table diving auntie got into it about 2 years back (my moms the baby girl) my aunt was all up in my moms face about this and that and called her a selfish a$$ uppity biatch…my mom told my auntie to go f!ck herself and then said the most awesome thing I have ever heard in my life
and while your at it why dont you suck the shyt out the crack of my a$$ and get shytty drunk….LMAO this paints my mom in negative light. So before any assumptions are made she is a very well educated retired RN. but she is most definitely hood… and yes we did have to seperate them after that…..
@Shay-d-lady, dang shayD! your family is mad excitable!!! i love it!
i remember one time my boy was driving us to the chinese buffet at some point in college. and we almost got murdered by some assjack flyin out the parking lot, coming out the entrance not paying attention. so, my boy honked the horn (we KNEW he was pissed cuz he does not get worked up ever) and yelled what is possibly one of my favorite exclamations now: “what the fvck was that, assfvck?!?!?”
i mean, i still laugh about that to this day!! and i still shout it too. i really sorta pride myself on creative cursing. its an art! and i have this friend that says cursing is for stupid people, that i should find better ways to express myself. but honestly, nothing feels this effing good! lmao
@shatani, i really sorta pride myself on creative cursing. its an art!
ME too…
@Shay-d-lady, oh man….i was in the car (feelin the rage) and i mean i said like 30 curse words before i took a breath! it was all in a string, and yes some were repeated! lol
@Shay-d-lady,
while driving the other day, i called someone a “sh*t-f*cker”, which, if taken literally, is a very disgusting thing to be
@The Champ, and im sure that sh!t fvcker totally deserved it!
NO one insults folks funnier than African parents!! They really mismatch some ish. Talm bout:
“That bastard foolish ijot”. Huh?? WTF was that?
Or
“That Classless wonder of an entity” – this had me DYING when my mom said it
“That Classless wonder of an entity”
I’m stealing this one.
@miss t-lee,
Me too. Dayum if that one won’t get used! LMAO!
Blackgirl Online is that bizness. They have all the music. I was almost ashamed to admit that to people, but for real that dude Slam has everything. But alas I can no longer plunder. They tried to charge my black a** for membership to the forum. I said there is no way I’m going to pay you to steal from someone else.
I say all that to say my sign is I’ve gotten way more frugal in my older age. Not cheap to all you potential partners out there just more frugal. I won’t buy stuff without thoroughly thinking about it.
You got the insight on any other sites. I need to fill up my new terabyte hard drive I got for 50% off (see frugal). moviehustle.com is real good.
@Wood, I co sign on the frugal
I mean my list of name brand grocery store must haves have gotten shorter and shorter…..I draw the line at cheese, deli meat, and cereal though..
” I co sign on the frugal”
Yeah…I been frugal since frugal was frugal.
LOL!!!
@miss t-lee, lmao!
yeah, ive always been like that. im the queen of free stuff. i feel like if i can get more for the same money then i definitely should! doesnt matter much what it is…
Exactly.
My motto?
Never pay full price, if you can get the same item at a discount.
@miss t-lee, Never pay full price, if you can get the same item at a discount.
girl I feel you on that…
@Wood,
Co-signage! l0l
@Wood,
they’re charging for membership? since when? i was there yesterday and didnt hafta pay a dime.
***btw, the forums at allsexresources are another good spot***
@The Champ, is everything ok, bruh? ya know there are support groups to help you work through this devoted interested to such websites…your homework this weekend is step away from the computer and go out. wait, never mind you’re in the burgh. well then…i guess to each his own. *patting egg head*
@Miss Patterson,
hmmm. i won’t say anything other than the fact that the “saintly, innocent” side of ms. p definitely needs more people. we all know that private school chicks are closet freaks
@The Champ, “we all know that private school chicks are closet freaks”
ur Mom.
@The Champ, I nominate myself to be Miss P’s more people. You stay on the hunt for black(squirrel)tail, what the problem eyuh??
@overit, thank you girl…i knew you’d have my back. champers needs baby jeezus to help get his mind off the black tail. we should thrown in some glitter for encouragement too!
@The Champ,
They charge me.
Allsexresources.com here I come. Where’s my lotion? j/k
@Wood, wow you got a Terabyte of space?? Nice. PC or Mac? What are your other grand plans for all that space? You should install every software known to man just cuz you can.
Yes, I’m a geek.
@Luvvie,
A geek to?!! I’m officially in love now. It’s external for the PC or MAC. But I have it on a PC. I’m trying to get everything I can!
@Wood,
Ooooo nice. How much did you cop it? I’m actually looking for a new external drive.
Sidenote: Everyone is invited to the funegro services I will be having for my external hard drive. I dropped it on the floor on Monday in Photoshop Class, and no comps are recognizing it. PBG, we may need your prayer corner for this one.
@Wood,
Terabyte hard drive? I’m tryin to find out where’d you cop it for 50% off?
@AkShone,
newegg.com
thenerds.net
tigerdirect.com
Try those…
At 23, I know I’m getting old when:
1) I start to recall what I was doing ten years ago.
2)I’m over ‘sleeping cute’ when it comes to hair styles. That four day neck crook aint worth it.
3) I am the conservative babe in the club (when I go). I once was all about showing cleavage, now I need to be covered from neck to knees, lol.
4) I enjoy the serenity of early mornings.
5)And lastly, I really love to sit and receive life advice from older people. It’s like I can really respect their opinions because they’ve been where I am going.
“2)I’m over ’sleeping cute’ when it comes to hair styles. That four day neck crook aint worth it”
I applaud you, I never could “sleep cute”. It was always a waste of time and money to go to the shop, ’cause I just slept anyway I wanted to…lol
@miss t-lee, word!
sleeping cute was never in my repertoire…i could start out mad cute, but once asleep i was no longer in control! i would wake up with my hair standing straight up on one side…
@shatani, sleeping cute was never in my repertoire
so you’ve slept “ugly” your entire life?
***making mental note not to sleep over after post vsb bbq rendezvous with shat***
@The Champ
lmao! yes indeed….its all good now that i rock the natural…but in my permie days, it would be all over the place. i would walk past a mirror and bust out laughing…
@Ange, im feeling you on number 5…i love talking to older people nowadays and i never used to feel like that!
another thing is that ive started trying to be a “better example” for young folk…that feels weird! when i was working with adolescent girls i really started to notice how much kids will emulate you and was like, i better stop ackin a fool now!
plus i also know im old cuz i have clothes that are over a decade old! like my gray sweatshirt that i wear around the house that ive had for like 12 years! lol
@Ange, I once got a HORRIBLE Charley Horse in my neck from tryna sleep cute. That was back in my perm days. Now with my natural hair, I could sleep like a crackhead in withdrawal (all restless and ish), and I’m still good when I wake up in the morn.
I also totally cosign the conservative tendency… I am liberal in a lot of things but my core values have become very conservative. I am all about family being building blocks of society (but I define family liberally Yeah on G.a.y Marriage…) but I am all about fiscal responsibility, and self reliance and more and more I begin to question my stance on urban America and what part lack of personal responsibility plays in the overall scheme of things…dont get me wrong shyt still aint equal and no where near fair but at what point is it our responsibility to realize that and do what we have to do to try and overcome the obstacles?
@Shay-d-lady, ive definitely become more fiscally conservative….although, i remain socially liberal.
iont even have no real job an im think about 401k’s and thangs…
@Liz,
this makes me smile and sh*t.
lol at “smiling and sh*tting” at the same time like i was a 2 year old
@The Champ,
you know it feels good!
I’ve always been into books and quiet time alone so that isn’t a good way for me to guage whether or not I’m getting ‘old’. I never leave the house before 9:30 p.m. if I’m going out and I only wear pajamas if it’s freezing out. So I can’t co-sign any of that. Here, however, is how I know I am getting old:
- Sometime in October, I had a chex related hip injury. I limped for two days. I knew then that I was old.
- I also know that I’m old cuz I want to go to clubs but I don’t want there to be any hyper 20 somethings there. I want it to be full of 30 somethings, listening to the same music you’d hear anywhere else.
- I have pains related to a chronic illness so any morning can bring on some new ache. But I know I’m old cuz I bought a heating pad to treat spasms and such (I also used it on my hip after the chex injury).
- I see a cute baby and sometimes my ovaries start to twitch. Damn that biological clock.
- I look at a man and think ‘he looks responsible, loyal and steadfast’ instead of ‘he’s hot’.
“- I also know that I’m old cuz I want to go to clubs but I don’t want there to be any hyper 20 somethings there. I want it to be full of 30 somethings, listening to the same music you’d hear anywhere else”
Exactly. 18 and up clubs? Oh no.
@miss t-lee, Exactly. 18 and up clubs? Oh no.
exactly and I really am not to quick to jump into a 21 and up club.. I loves a good 25 and up joint….they sell wangs and shyt and have plenty of chairs and I can almost assure that they will play Baby Im scared of you, Triggerman, and an old school gangsta walk mix…
Yep!!!
At the 25 and up it’s all about wangs and places to sit.
@miss t-lee,
“At the 25 and up it’s all about wangs and places to sit. ”
***tempted, but since i had a free milkshake this morning, ive decided to leave this comment alone***
You know after I typed that, I realized I set myself up big time.
Why don’t you go ahead and knock them down? lol
@The Champ, wow i didn’t know you were into “free milkshakes”…hmm. really? cue in Kelis song as Champ struts down the catwalk…
@Shay-d-lady,
“Triggerman, and an old school gangsta walk mix…”
Ahhhh, those gansta walk days…that takes me back. I could go to a party, drink, dodge bullets, drink again, fight and end the night in the sheets of an unsupecting coed back on U of M campus…the good ol’ days.
@V.E.G., – I look at a man and think ‘he looks responsible, loyal and steadfast’ instead of ‘he’s hot’.
I cosign on that one. I find the intelligent men who are loyal and responsible A LOT more sexy than a man who looks good. It’s a plus to have both, but I will take the personality over looks anyday…
@Leila, word!
ive been like that forever though…brilliant and funny get me EVERY time. and i love a man thats loyal to his girl….not in that homewreckery way, im just sayin. i enjoy knowing good eggs. they keep me sane and are the reason why i cant generalize negative isht to all men (or all black men)
like that nonsense about how all men cheat. nah, they dont. i know that for a fact and it helps me keep hope alive!
@V.E.G., im so with you on this one!
“- I see a cute baby and sometimes my ovaries start to twitch. Damn that biological clock.”
my friends be laughin at me when i say, “that little girl was so cute she made my ovaries ache!”
have you ever seen that bandaid commercial with the cute little black girl (and a little white boy) singing about being stuck on bandaid? girrrrl…i thought i was gonna pass out, she was so cute!!
@shatani,
Yup, I am right there too.
I am blaming the Baby R US coupon books.
@V.E.G.,
- I see a cute baby and sometimes my ovaries start to twitch. Damn that biological clock.
do ugly babies have that same effect?
@The Champ,
Babies are never ugly. We call them ‘precious’…sounds nicer.
And, no, precious babies don’t make the ovaries twitch.
“do ugly babies have that same effect?”
I just say ” well bless their hearts” (this is a southern pity phrase) and keep it movin’.
@miss t-lee, lmao! this phrase—>well bless their hearts” (this is a southern pity phrase) and keep it movin’.<–has many uses.
@ VEG
“Sometime in October, I had a chex related hip injury. I limped for two days. I knew then that I was old.”
Yes, and this was PRIME roast for me. I had NO sympatation (yes, sympatation) for ya, tryna do all these things like you was a young whippa snappa.
Oh, and you dumb for calling ugly babies “precious”
@V.E.G.,
- I also know that I’m old cuz I want to go to clubs but I don’t want there to be any hyper 20 somethings there. I want it to be full of 30 somethings, listening to the same music you’d hear anywhere else.
Co-sign.
“I see a cute baby and sometimes my ovaries start to twitch. Damn that biological clock.”
@V.E.G., It doesn’t even take a cute baby to make my ovaries twitch. It could be random things like watching a good movie…seeing a cute old couple holding hands…or the right cocktail. I also know when I’m ovulating…i’m so clockwork it’s madness. Ya know, I had a strong urge to procreate after election night, but I took a cuervo shot instead, cheered and went to bed. this was all TMI, wasn’t it?
@Miss Patterson,
if by “took a cuervo shot instead, cheered and went to bed” you meant “found the nearest washing machine, set it to spincycle, and sat on it while riding a sybian machine” i totally believed that this happened
@The Champ,
“sybian machine”
I am sooooo done…lol
@miss t-lee,
He was sooo wrong for that! LOL!!
@The Champ, ride deez.
@Miss Patterson,
@The Champ, oh snap…wait…i saw that machine on um…pbs or something. that machine is bananas!!! it can…do a.l.o.t.
@Miss Patterson,
Yeah…I wanted to invest in one…but I decided against it…I think it would scare the guys in my life…lol
@Miss Patterson,
You saw it on PBS. Mmmhmm…*side eye*
I know Im old
I live in a 4 bedroom house all by myself. The other day I was cold sitting on my couch, so I went into the extra bedroom and got a comforter and then sat on the couch, when I was a kid I used to walk over to the thermostat and crank it to 80, times have changed.
@Intellectual Hedonist, “and crank it to 80,”
i still do this …um maybe dats why i get “surprise” heating bills from nov-feb. Like surprise as in “Gol’ Lee ..who else in here , this cannot be right???”
LOL
“The other day I was cold sitting on my couch, so I went into the extra bedroom and got a comforter and then sat on the couch”
You got that right. Turning the heat on is a last resort. I got blankets and big fuzzy socks for that…lol
@miss t-lee, You got that right. Turning the heat on is a last resort. I got blankets and big fuzzy socks for that…lol
I am sitting at my computer at home with fuzzy socks and a big a$$ comforter wrapped around as I type right now.. shyt I cant turn the heat up..my light bill gone be sky high!!! LOL
@Shay-d-lady, lmao…i dont have fuzzy socks, but i do have my Freudian Slippers!
@shatani, LMAO @my Freudian Slippers!
its funny AND true! i am clearly a big dork…i love silly psychology stuff. i have freudian slippers which are ridiculously warm and look like freud himself. i also have freudian slips, which are just post-it notes. and next on my list? the pop-up book of phobias!!! lmao…oh and i have rorShock! cards…those are a fun party game.
@Intellectual Hedonist, LMAO my parents used to hate me for this. There was 6 of us so if we all stayed quiet, they could never find out who it was.
lol so cute!!!
my mom and dad are the ones who go to war on the theromostat. my dad is ALWAYS cold (how do you need to wear a blanket over your shoulders in southern cali??) and my mom is frugal as heck and doesn’t believe in running up the electric bill or wasting energy that “we can’t afford to waste in this state”.
one winter there were some Boondocks comic strips that touched on Granddad being stingy on the heat. me and my bro printed them out and posted them around my mom’s desk. she was “heated” lol
dang i knew i was 20 going on 30. i’m smack square in the middle of number 1. and i have no shame.
@Oluchi,
vsb.com: where shamelessness happens
I knew I was old when my little 6 yr old cousin pointed out that I was incorrectly pop locking and dropping it, resulting in her taking me off to the side and working it out with me step by step.
Also, when I try to reminisce to the music that was popular when I was young, she laughs hysterically as if I know nothing about music. When Alicia Keys brought out SWV and En Vgue during her performance on the BET Awards, the little cousin yawned and asked what the heck an En Vogue was. I explained that they were the Destiny’s Child of my generation, except they could actually sing. she still wanted them to get off the stage so she could see lil wayne and tpain.
another sign of getting old: when I wake up late during the weekend, I feel like my whole day is gone…as if I should be running errands, being responsible on non work days.
Falling asleep in the club after a long days work and one glass of wine: this never happened in my younger years. in fact, in my younger years, I’d scoff at a glass of wine and reach for the henn & coke.
@suga,
another sign of getting old: when I wake up late during the weekend, I feel like my whole day is gone…as if I should be running errands, being responsible on non work days.
you know whats crazy…i cant even sleep in anymore. even if i try, i can’t sleep past 10 am on a weekend.
@The Champ, I’mo start referring to you as “Wilbur”. I think it shows your real age.
@The Champ, I’mo start referring to you as “Wilbur”. I think it shows your real age.
you know this is my dad’s first name, right? (no bullsh*t)
@The Champ,
HA!! LMAO!! Thats just the most fantastic coincidence EVER!
@suga,
“another sign of getting old: when I wake up late during the weekend, I feel like my whole day is gone…as if I should be running errands, being responsible on non work days.”
I am so there with you. On the weekends, I’m up by 7, the house is clean by 9:30 and I’m on my way to the gym. I only sleep in if I’m sick or if I had a late night.
@suga,
another sign of getting old: when I wake up late during the weekend, I feel like my whole day is gone…as if I should be running errands, being responsible on non work days.
this is the TRUTH… 10am is late! i’m OLD!!
And another thing: My favorite store happens to be Target and I actually clip coupons and look through the sales papers every week for stuff like paper towels and tampons.
I get excited when I find new recipes and will hold long conversations with older women about food preparation.
I’ll be damned if I go to a popular movie during opening weekend ESPECIALLY if its sure to draw a young crowd. I’d like to HEAR the movie so I’ll happily catch a movie on a sunday afternoon
Whenever I think something is wrong with me, I google the symptons and prepare a list of questions for my doctor.
And I also judge men by a different standard than I used to: is he kind? is he responsible with money? does he know how to read? is his family crazy? will he curse someone out if they accidentally step on his shoe in the club?
Also, if I go to the club they MUST have seating. I am never in the mood to stand up in heels longer than 15 minutes anymore
“I’ll be damned if I go to a popular movie during opening weekend ESPECIALLY if its sure to draw a young crowd. I’d like to HEAR the movie so I’ll happily catch a movie on a sunday afternoon”
You ain’t lying…lol!!! About a year ago a date and I went to see a movie on opening weekend at 8pm. That was like a suicide mission.
I did find one theatre here that doesn’t allow anybody under 18 after 7 on the weekends. That’s the one I frequent if I wanna see something on a Friday/Saturday night.
@suga, We are . My girls and I have this phone tree type response to a good sale at Target, Bed Bath and Beyond, etc.
@suga, “Also, if I go to the club they MUST have seating. I am never in the mood to stand up in heels longer than 15 minutes anymore”
AMEN!
I know the standing time limit to each of my shoes.
@Intellectual Hedonist, I know the standing time limit to each of my shoes.
me too, girl. me too. and have informed a ninja at some point during the night, you have approximately 30 min before i’m gonna need to sit down.
“I google the symptons and prepare a list of questions for my doctor.”
@suga, I DID this too! when i had chronic appendicitis …scary but it’s true. they were like nah, you’d be in more pain…then they did a CT and were like Miss P, please proceed to ER. i was like “hmm…mmmm”
I used to be old when I was in my 20′s. Now that I’m 35, I’m young again. Seriously, I think I may be actually be the youngest person here:
I go to college.
I’m always kickin’ w/teenagers (my daughter and her friends who are always here).
I am in Tha Club, on the regular.
I stay up late.
I eat lots of Jolly Rancher candy.
I say “Oh, Mother, you’re so old-fashioned”.
So boooo @ all this elderly talk. Where’s the party?
@PBG, “I used to be old when I was in my 20’s. Now that I’m 35, ”
i can relate and co-sign in fact dat is prolly why I don’t have much to share..i have racked my dayum brain..i can only come up with late night trips to walmart LOL..other than that im eternally youthful. I claim that message in the name of Jesus, Buddah, Allah, God, Tao etc.
no aches ..rarely do i get a pain. and when i do, i quickly fix it. (can’t claim dat).
-Though i can’t ALWAYS kickit with the youngins(teens -sometimes they drive me nutty)-most do think Im like their dayum peer.
-most days, with the some exceptions lol..my middle name is silly.
-i honestly believe long life comes with a youthful mind, body and soul…though im not always in the club, best believe im doing something to perserve my 33.lol
@The Comeback Girl,
I agree with the idea of preserving my youth. I am in my late 20′s, and I love all things Harry Potter and That’s So Raven. I believe both of these things, plus my insane exercise regimen, counters my 10:30 weeknight bedtime, my bad knees, and occassional lower back pain.
@PBG,
i cain’t WAIT till my kids are older so i can get my Swagga (or whatever the new word is) back!!
@pgh muse,
Still being young once they got older was the best thing about having them early!
@PBG,
I KNOW! I have girlfriends my age (29) with 12 year olds and stuff and I look @ them and I’m hot cause mine are babies…
@PBG, good you can keep hope alive for us then in January in DC. Because we WILL be going out. So, everybody up in here needs to dust off their walkers.
Young azz Luvvie….lmao!!!!
Champ–you nailed it. ( I think I’m gonna regret typing that).
Especially since we both turned 30 this year.
Especially 1 &2. Shoooot my back has been hurting for almost a week straight, and did I injure it? Do I know why it’s hurting? hellz nah!!!!. My BFF is like…we’re getting old!!!!
Clubbing? Yeah it’s more like once a month now (if that!) and I’m perfectly happy with that. I prefer going to a show or something now or kicking it at happy hour. I love lazy weekends, just laying around watching documentaries on PBS.
Dayum…growing up is not for the faint at heart…lol
Champ–you nailed it. ( I think I’m gonna regret typing that).
lol…i’m gonna let it slide. (double entendre intended)
::snicker::
@The Champ, that is not fair. She left herself WIDE OPEN (all possible puns intended).
I think you getting soft in your old age (PUN INTENDED)
lmao
People of VSB…i need your input.
A woman whom i was in a relationship with were having a conversation the other day. (you know the kind. the “when did our relationship get shot to sh*t?” type”
Basically i was explaining that since we broke up on good terms and (i still see her sometimes) that the feelings an passion i had for her do not just go away.
Then…she said something that concerned me. “When our relationship started changing and I couldn’t give you everything you wanted, I felt like then you loved me more. Then when stuff started changing and I started offering you outlets you took them. Then when I was ready i didn’t think you wanted to stop what you were doing and I feel like I loved you more.
Background: we were together for 8 months
: I am the type of guy that is very (almost brutally upfront with what im doing (but not always with who because thats a security thing and I would expect the same from anyone I mess with)
What say you people of VSB…I would like a little help on this one…
yung Esquired asks?
“Then…she said something that concerned me. “When our relationship started changing and I couldn’t give you everything you wanted, I felt like then you loved me more. Then when stuff started changing and I started offering you outlets you took them. Then when I was ready i didn’t think you wanted to stop what you were doing and I feel like I loved you more.”
it’s more to the SQuared than ur telling us yung Esquire. try not to be overly influenced by the whimsical musings of a split tail. try to wrap your brain around the belief that women mostly are driven by emotions, caprice as it meets their needs and strong sense of entitlement. be ye not moved. let ur feelings be what they may but don’t let feelings drive you. let feelings advise you. if they advise you wrong remember you can’t blame them. remember all power comes from within. don’t give yours away especially to impulse.
pay right here.
@genius khan, Oh I follow all that…Something one of my professors told me one time has always stayed with me. Let logic be your guide…your emotions will often lead you astray where as logic is often a undisturbed path.
Knowing the type of woman she is however…she meant that sh*t…I was simply stunned that in a relationship when you say you love some body and mean it then how can a time come when you love them more or less…wtf is that about? because then at that point you bring in the question…”if i loved you more from the beginning why even bother with you now? because at this point im so far removed from it she always thinks im being “short” or “having a bad day so ill ttyl”…
@ESQuared, LOL I am mad yall had relationship counseling on the getting old post…LMAO
I guess thats another sign of getting old….general discomfort at people not following rules and shyt….LOL
@ESQuared,
do you wanna be back with this chick?
@ESQuared, lately i’ve been trying hard not to speak in absolutes when discussing the behaviors of men and women. Therefore, I can only speak from my personal experience the feelings and perceptions of myself & other women who are loyal, sentimental and inclined to long term relationships. that being said…love does grow and evolve through the course of any relationship. this is only pathological if the woman’s love towards you grows more intense as someone pulls away. that behavior is called borderline personality disorder. there’s a book out there called ‘i hate you, don’t leave me’ that breaks it all down. but i digress… love is not an exact science. and personally while i can physically prolong a relationship s3xually with a man (who i once had a relationship with) i realize it’s destructive/ counterproductive for me emotionally. i’ve heard many guys attest to the fact that fewer women-than men-can pursue physical relationships with no strings attached. and even fewer women can pursue such a relationship with a man they were once in a serious relationship with and not feel a little um…used.
i understand that the feelings/passion you have towards your girl do not immediately go away for you, but realize that’s it’s only going to get harder for you and her to separate& interpret passion from emotion as time goes on. basically, i say move on while things are still civil.
@Miss Patterson,
“basically, i say move on while things are still civil.”
lol…so it took you 250 words to come to that main point?
@The Champ,
come here. *batting eyelashes and balling up fist*
@Miss Patterson, Shay…yeah i guess your right…but i try and get things out of my system as they come up.
Champ…not unless something in my life changes where i feel like doing the relationship thing again…im in that place..you know the do what i want when i feel like it with who i feel like it place…and im not in a hurry to leave…
Miss Patterson…
your right…and thats why the other day i was in “a state” and she said she wanted me to come see her and shall we say “get to crush groovin” I didnt go because i somehow knew that it would all blow up in my face like a roman candle with a short wick…
but im separated from it now…and not really worried about it….
Thank you people of V.S.B. for being my sound board and helping me make sure i wasnt being stupid and using “logical non-logic”
V.S.B. ….. where good advice happens…
@ESQuared,
You need to send a letter to my advice blog, so I can drop some sagacity on yo’ situation!! Click PBG and get free!
if someone says you look good for your age you can be sure they think you’re old and you probably are. [forgot whom]
@genius khan,
“if someone says you look good for your age you can be sure they think you’re old and you probably are.”
So Luvvie has be insulting me on the sly all this time. D@mn her!
@V.E.G.
LMAO!! I have not!! You IS fabulous, V
(otherwise, I wouldnt claim you). Don’t let no one tell you otherwise!They tryna break up a happy home lol
The idea of staying out past 9:30 on a weeknight is ridiculous. If I want to stay out on a weekend, and by ‘out’ I mean past 11, I need to get in a solid nap. No fuggit! On days I work from home, I take a NAP! What? Don’t you wish you could?
I can’t eat like I used to. I can’t eat sushi, a burger, three slices of pizza, and four shots of Petron. I will be curled up in the corner of my big ass bathroom for weeks.
Oh and another thing, as I’ve gotten older, I can’t live anywhere with a small bathroom or too much noise. When I was younger, I wanted to live where the action was. Now, I live in a spot where all the chain spots close at 10, Sunday-Thursday. Garbage gets picked up daily. Mail is here by 10 am! That’s cool with me.
Yet, I still get carded. I tried to buy a bottle of real likkah at the same store I buy wine in weekly, but I didn’t have my ID. Those rat bastards acted like they didn’t know I was well over 21 and wouldn’t sell me my drinkable!! Oh and I like wine way more than likkah. I don’t generally buy likkah unless I’m having people over or giving it to someone. Old=wine…and cheese.
I can’t eat like I used to. I can’t eat sushi, a burger, three slices of pizza, and four shots of Petron. I will be curled up in the corner of my big ass bathroom for weeks.
i’ve found this out as well. my appetite doesnt change, but the effect it has on me definitely does
@Hostess,
Oh and I like wine way more than likkah
i stopped even partaking of likkah (i likes this
) for like 2 years… strictly wine and the occassional beer. But I will drink Stoli’s with grapefruit juice now… this is my new “drink” 
I agree with everything you said, Champ. It’s tough for me to stay up past 11:30pm nowadays. And going out everyday of the weekend got tiring to me after undergrad. I have a co-worker who goes out drinking/partying Thurs-Sat every week. Personally, I’ve been there and done that, and I’ve grown up enough to know there are other ways to have a good time.
To add to the list, I can no longer hold my liquor like I used to while in undergrad or law school. It’s really kinda pathetic, but I’m happy with my 2 drink limit.
another thing about getting older…i have to workout much harder now than I did when I was younger, and I have to really watch what I eat. Those pounds can be sneaky, and they do not come off as easily as before.
@N.I.A.,
and i failed to mention my bad left knee (and sometimes my right knee) and occassional lower back pain. However, bot of those came from old running injuries.
@N.I.A., To add to the list, I can no longer hold my liquor like I used to while in undergrad or law school. It’s really kinda pathetic, but I’m happy with my 2 drink limit.
the exact opposite is true with me. it takes me 4 or 5 jack and cokes before i even feel a buzz now
@The Champ, the exact opposite is true with me. it takes me 4 or 5 jack and cokes before i even feel a buzz now
me too champ I can now drink with the best of them.. not sure if thats a good or bad thing though
@The Champ, I was going to say I actually have an increased tolerance for liquor.
I remember being able to party all night till 4/5am and then make it to work the next day like it’s all good. Now, if I go to bed past 1am I can barely wake up to go to work. Not just that, I get back pains sometimes when getting out of bed. I go to party and I dont want to drink as much anymore – and after 2 hrs I’m ready to go home. I absolutely LOVE doing nothing! Esp being at home in some comfortable sweats and doing nothing!
Thanks for reminding me that I’m getting old.
@Eve,
My friends are right…I’ve been old my whole life because I’ve always loved doing nothing and have never wanted to stay at a club for more than 2 hours. Oddly, now that I’m older I drink more when I’m out. But I think that’s because I’m trying to forget where I live right now. LOL!
you know you’re old when:
if you actually do go out, you crave an “old school” party where hoopefully they’ll play nothing but songs from the 90s and start the party at 9pm
when two stepping with the old cats at the lodge is more fun then quasi 2 stepping to tpain
when going to the library is exciting (again).
aww man, we’re all grown ups for real for real (throwing silent tantrum)
@eysqueen,
I love going to the library. And old-school parties are the SugarHoneyIceTea!!
@eysqueen,
“when two stepping with the old cats at the lodge is more fun then quasi 2 stepping to tpain”
Yes chile! And also those lodge-esque parties are the best, the drinks are cheap and there is about 0% chance of a fight, and you can sit down, and wear whatever and not be out of place, and the music is superb!…
lmao @ old a$$ alise.
@eysqueen,
when two stepping with the old cats at the lodge is more fun then quasi 2 stepping to tpain
YES!!!
I never comment but like the site, but I had to comment on this. Me and most of my friends turned 30 this year, and man did it bring changes. The twenty somthing me would have never gone to bed before 9pm on Friday night and gotten up before 9am on Sat. Sometimes on Friday at work I can’t wait to go home and get some sleep. Me and my friends were notorius for being on the scene for every cookout, party, club, event etc. Now I can careless. I use to love major events and crowded clubs. Now that I’m older give me smaller more intimate events with folks my age(noone younger than 25), good food, old school hip-hop(early 90′s), and a nice bottle of wine and I’m good!! O yea and I prefer a really good wine over Amaretto Sours.
@TiP,
welcome and sh*t
@TiP,
And that in a nutshell is my list.
My girls and I used to be the girls about town. Party was my middle name.
So much so that I made a point to party on all continents (still have have Asia and Australia left!).
But nowadays? Let me get the latest Indie flick from Netflix or a new episode of What Not to Wear, a solid bottle of a newly discovered wine, and my friday night is a success.
I am now the queen of dinner parties, I even throw some with themes.
I even appreciate routines, especially on Sundays : Church then Brunch then Home!!!
Dang! I am so old!
@TiP,
Amaretto Sours – amaretto makes me sick these days… yuck!
I can still drink all night I just detest being around the young people (unless I have already deemed them worthy of my prescence). I guess my gauge has been anythign my 17 yr old cousin thinks is cool I am obligated to tell her how stupid it is and hate on it.
A couple of weeks ago I woke up feeling like I dislocated my shoulder. I had jus slept on it wrong.
I have always had the thinking that most anything that gets heavy play on the radio nowadays blows chunks. I’ve never really liked radio music unless it was a dj spinnin sans playlist on friday or saturday night (DJ Bee!)
I guess my gauge has been anythign my 17 yr old cousin thinks is cool I am obligated to tell her how stupid it is and hate on it.
lol…i do the same thing to my nieces and nephew, on purpose
“injuring yourself during sex”
LMAO! Should we still consider you “the Champ” if after the home run you fall on the home plate?
@Ivy St.,
you need some work on your sports/sex analogies.
@The Champ,
LMAO!!! just couldn’t let Ivy slide…could you?
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
ivy’s been trying to slide for months now, lol. aint my fault she cant do it
@Ivy St.,
“there lies the man formally known as The Champ. He just can’t circle the bases like he used to.”
@N.I.A. isonebadmutha….,
Ha!
I know I’m getting old because:
1. When I go out to restaurants now, I order about half as much as I did a few years ago (then again, I’m no longer quite the starving undergrad. . . )
2. I’ve been having a much harder time getting up in the morning.
3. The other day, I see some kids getting into the elevator and think, wtf are middle school kids doing in the engineering building. Then I realized they’re freshmen.
4. The number of stress induced white hairs is increasing. In my undergrad, they’d grow on my head. That stopped, but now I get them in the face.
5. I like only a certain make and model of cars that were made between 1994 and 1999. I will probably drive these until a woman and/or child forces me to change.
6. Now when someone yells “Hey Mister” I think they’re talking to me. When that happened while I was in HS, I’d be looking around trying to find who they were talking about.
7. I now think getting braces (or invis-aligns) would be cool.
8. I no longer pull all-nighters just because I happened to forget to goto sleep. Now, I hit the sack no later than 3am.
9. I had dreams about a house I saw in CL for sale that I’d love to buy.
10. I can be at a bar or club talking to someone old enough to get in and make cultural references that they weren’t alive to get (ok, so I’m not quite here yet. . .)
“7. I now think getting braces (or invis-aligns) would be cool.”
You don’t know bad I’ve been kicking around the idea of invisaligns.
I think I’m going for it in ’09.
@kamakula,
This is a great list! #6 is hilarious and very true. The first time someone called me mister I found it funny… now it is just depressing.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
I have a fit when some one calls me “Ma’am”. I’m like “Ummm…no.” And walk away.
2. I’ve been having a much harder time getting up in the morning.
they have pills for this, yanno
8. I no longer pull all-nighters just because I happened to forget to goto sleep. Now, I hit the sack no later than 3am.’
Shoot, the fact that u can last till 3am shows you still got some youth left. I cant hang past 1:30am.
@kamakula,
6. Now when someone yells “Hey Mister” I think they’re talking to me. When that happened while I was in HS, I’d be looking around trying to find who they were talking about.
I know… I’m a lady. kids call me “Miss ____”. wow.
@pgh muse, I think ma’am is worse.
You’re gettiong old:
1. if you remember the theme song to “Fraggle Rock”.
2. if you are a woman and you wear your comfortable shoes to the club. F*ck bringing s*xy back.
3. if you are aggrivated by loudness of the music in the club.
4. if you go to the club and you don’t recognize any of the dance moves being performed by the crowd.
5. if you can do the “wop”, “cabbage patch”, “running man”, “Bart Simpson”, “Butterfly (or tootsie roll)” with great proficiency.
6. when your younger family members are genuinely shocked that you have knowledge of pop culture (lyrics to current songs, celebrity gossip, etc)
7. if you suddenly realize that you prefer to listen to lyrics that don’t contain profanity.
8. if you can no longer make an intelligent guess as to how old a random child is. (ie you think a ten year old is fifteen)
9. if you are offended by the urban youth sagging their pants.
10. if you know all of the lyrics to “Ice Ice Baby” or “You Can’t Touch This”.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, I hate them damned sagging pants. I jus wanna kick someone.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
um yeah all dis is mighty old. I refuse to wear comfortable shoes anywhere wit my grown woman clothes on..but i guess i MIGHT be semi old when I can easily take them off MOST places..inlcuding church, the club, p-fiddy’s establishment..i just don’t give a ding dang flim flam.
@The Comeback Girl,
I forgot to add if you use the phrase “ding dang flim flam” you’re getting old too. LOL!
@The Comeback Girl, you sho did take off your shoes to dance the other night lol.
@overit, i did wait 45 mins tho..i had to warm yall up first to all that is CBG…
@The Comeback Girl, btw, we are all gonna give Gem of the Ocean a proper DC welcome, so please do not be on CP time lol. Details to follow…
#8 made me chuckle.
“6. when your younger family members are genuinely shocked that you have knowledge of pop culture (lyrics to current songs, celebrity gossip, etc)”
Yeah, my lil cousins try to catch me on this all time.
I tell ‘em “how old do you think I am?!?!”
7. if you suddenly realize that you prefer to listen to lyrics that don’t contain profanity.
i may have to take back my “lack of oldness” cuz you know, i’ve found myself wondering why folks have cursed in songs where it wasn’t necessary. maybe that makes me old…
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain
LMAO you got me on
1. (i love red and I put my daughters twists in those two ponytails all the time)
5. this is why I do 25 an up clubs I have a chance to buss all these moves …LMAO
7. I dont like crude and lewd a$$ lyrics.. I can do cussing just fine but I Lil Wayne Pu$$y Monster and shyt on that level…Im good
8..its all the hormones in the food not my age..he.ll since when did 10 year olds wear c-cups?
and number 10?? LOL I still might have a Hammer cassette tape round this joint
8. if you can no longer make an intelligent guess as to how old a random child is. (ie you think a ten year old is fifteen)
oh yes yes yes!!! I can never guess right. I thought ny neighbors kid was like 11… shes in the 3rd grade.
Hell, I thought Maliah Obama was 14!
And there I was, talking about whoa, she’s going to go through HS in the white house. My sister was like, aren’t you getting ahead of yourself giving him 2 terms. I’m like why? She said but the girl is just 10.
*inserts “uh?” face*
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
“8. if you can no longer make an intelligent guess as to how old a random child is. (ie you think a ten year old is fifteen)”
I am an EXPERT @ this. I often amaze people w/how accurate I usually am guessing a child’s age. My BFF will point out kids in the mall and say “How is that one?” all dayum day!
But according to the rest of your list, I’m as old as Cooter Brown!! LOL!
You know you old cause you just said “Cooter Brown”
CTFU!!!!
@miss t-lee,
Exactly! Cooter Brown was a bad mo’fo! According to my Big Mama, he was the dirtiest, drunkest, oldest, messiest, dumbest, lyin’-est, triflin’-est person on the face of the earth! LMAO!
Yep we always say “drunker than Cooter Brown”
He surely was a bad mofo.
9. if you are offended by the urban youth sagging their pants.
i actually told a kid to pull his f*cking pants up the other day. mind you, this is a kid i know, not some random teen thug who might be packing an ak-87 in his waistband, lol. i may be old, but i’m not stupid
@The Champ,
“i may be old, but i’m not stupid”
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@The Champ, LMAO
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
I subscribe to #s 1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 8 and 9 on your list.
I can do the bombest running man and cabbage patch you ever did see.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
dang! I know everything on your list… it’s like that?
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, d*mn I’m old! Co-sign on ya whole list.
my spunky e-friend!! your list is hilarious!!
and really, you had me at Fraggle Rock!! lol that was my show–i liked the puppets better than the cartoon. “cast your cares away, worry for another day….”
and i know and still do #5. Champers be hatin on my old schoolness. he may have a large dome but there’s not a lot there but space and wasted opportunity.
“but there’s not a lot there but space and wasted opportunity.”
*leans back with left hand cupped over mouth*
dayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyum, dissed and DISmissed, gemmy style!
@Gem of the Ocean,
You forgot the *clap-clap*!!!
@Gem of the Ocean, “but there’s not a lot there but space and wasted opportunity”-good one Gem, good one!
I’m 25, so I’m right there in that mid 20′s spectrum where I can still do obnoxious stuff, but it just makes me feel guilty. It seems like for every “young” thing I do, it’s balanced out by an “old” action. Like… I actually like “Do Da Stanky Legg,” and I have to repeatedly fight urges to do the dance. At the same time, I hate Jim Jones.
I have to know the dress code before I go to a party/club/event. This is my way of profiling the type of kneegrows who will be there and the corresponding level of n*ggardom.
22 yr old SC could kill a bottle of Heaven Hill or Quality House. 25 yr old SC would get killed by a bottle of Heaven Hill or Quality House. lol. I can only mess with the good stuff now.
I have this urge to drink a glass of wine with every meal.
Michelle Bernard & Tamron Hall are up there with Lauren London for me.
Election season is over and I still watch Hardball.
@SouthernCharm, Check my stanky leg reference below…lol
I’m with SC. I’ve only been doing top shelf since 2004. I use to be able to jump back from those cheap binges not now.
Hey and don’t forget Michelle Obama. “She gotta donk”!!! I really find older women off the chain now.
I like the stanky legg…lol
@miss t-lee,
Now hit da booty do… hit da booty do… hit da booty do!
okay… i feel guilty now. lol
Ain’t nothin’ wrong with mind-numbing idiotic dances…lol
This will keep us young!!!
@SouthernCharm,
I guess I am old as dirt…cause I don’t even know what the “stanky legg” is.
Was gonna say the same thing. You know you old when someone says ” I actually like “Do Da Stanky Legg,” and I have to repeatedly fight urges to do the dance” and you have no idea what they’re talking about.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
I’m witcha. The Stanky Leg sounds like a potential Adam Sandler movie
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
“I guess I am old as dirt…cause I don’t even know what the stanky leg is”.
Ditto…I just heard that “Shake That Booty Meat” a couple of months ago after my nephew was playing it in his car! I mean, I like a woman’s booty meat…but it just sounded so WRONG, lol!!!
I have to know the dress code before I go to a party/club/event. This is my way of profiling the type of kneegrows who will be there and the corresponding level of n*ggardom.”
“I have this urge to drink a glass of wine with every meal.”
“Election season is over and I still watch Hardball.”
all reasons why i am still part of the SC-fan club.
I just found out what the stanky leg was… 5 minutes ago.
Between that and the Rack Daddy, which I just found out about 5 days ago, I am convinced that my 23-in-8-days self is too old.
I’m 22 but my body is old:
1) You are better than the weatherman at predicting the weather.
2) You cant play video games by yourself or for more than two hours.
3) I no longer want to s3x every good looking woman i see, only half of them.
4) I dont get excited about the club, I get excited about the sale that polo is having right now. (40% off, plus an extra 15% after_
5) You get drunk off of alot less drinks.
6) You no longer drink long island iced teas, car bombs and mind erasers.
@Peyso, ) I dont get excited about the club, I get excited about the sale that polo is having right now. (40% off, plus an extra 15% after
LOL yeah I get them emails too..I love online shopping!!!
@Peyso,
“6) You no longer drink long island iced teas, car bombs and mind erasers.”
LMAO! This is the beginning of the end!
@Peyso,
*GASP* Polo is having 40% off????? Why didnt I kno this till now??? Excuse me as I go peruse. I need new long sleeve polos.
3) I no longer want to s3x every good looking woman i see, only half of them.
lmao!
I can’t DRANK like I used to!!!!!!!!!
2 Drinks, Im nice.
3 drinks Im pretty much drunk, but can still keep the party going.
4 drinks, Im taking my azz home, because Im about 2 seconds from either passing out, or needing to get the liqour out of my body if you know what I mean.
I don’t really do shots, unless there’s a celebration of some kind.
And oh yeah, if I do end up in a club (which is not often), I only need to be there 45 minutes to an hour. Anything longer and I am READT to go!
@V Renee,
i thought everyone from cincy was a drunk? who’d a thunk it
@The Champ
Im a recovering alkie. One day at a time is what I keep telling myself.
you know, up until i started reading some of y’alls lists, i thought i was old.
nope.
i’m a spring chick out this motherf*cker.
hell, i’m the dude that comes home from work at 5am only to be up at 9am to help his boy move into a new place.
hell, i’m up at 4am at least 2 nights out the week.
though i’d much rather stay at home sometimes, i have no beef going out.
the only time i really felt old, old was at homecoming when i saw a bunch of young a** college students like and i think i said out loud, “man, college must be starting at 12 now-a-days or all these 12 year olds are prodigies.”
other than, i’m awesome.
@Panama Jackson,
Yeah. We are in the same boat. I loove me some sleep but if there is a concert for an act that I like on a Tuesday and doors open at 11, I’m there never mind that I need to get up early.
And if the concert happens to be the day after a night when I was out till 2 a.m. then so be it.
I love NPR with the best of ‘em and listen to it in the car. And I love the History Channel – but that’s for Sunday’s after church. lol. Not Saturday night.
l
@V.E.G.,
Before I begin, when did the comment section start automatically start adding the above – ‘@ V.E.G.,’?
Anywho, while it’s harder to get up the next day, I WILL stay out or up until 3/4 in the morning on a weekday if the situation calls for it. And by situation I mean an event that’s worthy of my prescence or $ex. $ex is always worth is. Suprisingly, Im usually the least tired the next day after all night romp in the hay.
@V Renee,
our magnificent lizzard is responsible for that
@Panama Jackson, man, you’re so old, you DJed at the boston tea party.
@kamakula, LMAO!!!
*Insert witty “you’re so old” joke here*
*comatose*
When I realized that I was old…
1. I went to Sam’s Club ( Walmart’s evil cousin) one day. Well my checkout clerk and young rascal of 17 or 18 was singing “Do the Stanky Leg” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJDsQobM0Ao)
Well his co-worker a young lady of the same age was like hey don’t sing that around that man he don’t know nothing about that soung.
That’s when I realize I had gotten old. When people start thinking your to old to listen to rap it’s not a good thing.
No don’t get me wrong the song is asinine and only good for when you’re drunk and in a club that’s going to end from a fight, and I won’t go to those type places anymore. But it’s wrong to assume I’m too old for that now.
2. My daddy keeps telling me “Boy you damn near Thurty (30 for the southern challenge)”. Not a nice thing to say to someone in their late 20′s.
That’s when I realize I had gotten old. When people start thinking your to old to listen to rap it’s not a good thing.
damn thats funny. true, but funny. i usually tell them that i started this gangsta sh*t. and this the motherf*cking thanks i get?
but then i make sure to caveat it with, “well, not that bullsh*t you listen too…like actual GOOD rap music…”
@Panama Jackson, yes I find myself saying on an almost daily basis, this ain’t real music , you don’t know nuffin’ bout the 90′s, and then realize that is exactly what my mama said to me about the 60′s & 70′s music and bashing my beloved late 80′s & 90′s cuts…
“damn thats funny. true, but funny. i usually tell them that i started this gangsta sh*t. and this the motherf*cking thanks i get?”
Niiice.
@miss t-lee,
LOL…I knew you’d catch that.
@AkShone,
*smiling*
you know you’re old when you can talk about “good” rap music or if you’re in DC and can use the word gogo in a sentence without there being a baby in the room.
@Wood,
lol… you know old folks will exaggerate ages, stories, ailments, and anything of the sort. lol @ being bout thutty-sevum, having a slight headache, but think you’re having an aneurysm
The older I get the more I become obsessed with not being hungry. I always make sure I have a snack in my purse, just like my grandma does.
Long drive? Pack a snack. Middle school graduation? Pack a snack. I went to take the LSAT last february and realized that I was the only young person in the room who made sure I had crackers, water, grapes, and little pieces of hard candy to suck on.
my cabinet at work looks like we are about to go into war. Soup, crackers, vitamins. I actually make sure that I drink a bottle of water every few hours… I force myself… I can’t become dehydrated
@laylah, I def horde food too. It all goes back to childhood. 4 brothers and I was always keeping guard over some Cinammon Toast Crunch. One time I put my Mickey Dee’s meal on the table so I could go get comfortable, I came downstairs to a lone fry on the table.
LOL, I never thought of that as a byproduct of being old, but I tend to horde food too. If I was snowed in the office I’d be cool…and I always have something to read, jic.
“The older I get the more I become obsessed with not being hungry.”
@Dom, i call this the Zone Diet…and yes zone bars and clif bars can be found in my purse during random outings.
If by chance I do go out (not likely)
and I stay out past 11pm (not likely)
and happen to drink liquor (not likely as my age has awakened a more refined palate (read: wine)
my ability to recover from a hang over has exponetially increased from a couple of hours to AT LEAST 2 days. Thats at least 2 days before I actually “feel” like myself again. Has that happened to anyone??
@Sonri, my ability to recover from a hang over has exponetially increased from a couple of hours to AT LEAST 2 days. Thats at least 2 days before I actually “feel” like myself again. Has that happened to anyone??
no. you’re alone on this one, missy
@Sonri,
I am with you. I conceal my wild-er nights to Fridays so it gives me 2 days to recuperate… And I am pissed when I miss my Yoga class on saturday morning.
Old age is no joke!
@MsSula@Work, I just take monday off
Oh I am so understanding this. Last night I was invited to see Emily King and Res, Fo Free! And I came up with about 10 reason’s I wasn’t going. #1 Starting with not having a sitter, then closing in on #10 Pseudo Neo Soul artist attract the lezzy’s! Which closed out all prospects of finding my Dirk Diggler in Shining Armor!
then ma’am you were SADLY mistaken. that show was bananas.
plus the free grey goose flowing ever so lovely. and we threw in a free buffet too….free food, free liquor, emily king and res (who is much shorter than i thought she might be)…
add to the fact that doors were at 7pm…lol…not 10…but 7pm, it was an old folks extravaganza in there..
*sheds salty tears of regret for not coming out*
Damned mine eyes, damned mine eyes! The tears are rolling heavy for missing this. I knew that someone was going to be truthful and tell how much I missed this. I was looking for a liar that would just say it was awful. Thanks alot Panama! Thanks!
“plus the free grey goose flowing ever so lovely. and we threw in a free buffet too….free food, free liquor, emily king and res (who is much shorter than i thought she might be)…”
Tell me why I got to the bar on the third floor just as they stopped serving the free liks. What happened to the days when a screwdriver was 5 dollars?
@IVR, i’ll tell you what happened…Grey Goose sponsored the event which means we had to serve Grey Goose all night for any vodka drinks. we sell Goose for $9 bucks. we couldn’t even sell rail vodka. normally, our screwdrivers are only $6 bucks.
@Mme. Editor-in-Chief,
Res –
Wow! What happened to her?
I’m late hopping on the VSB train today… Hey Y’all…
I knew I was old when my mother and I started comparing aches and pains.
So I am 29, and I have a part time job in the evenings at a drug store, and all my coworkers are between the ages of 18 -22, they all go to the college I graduated from. Well I knew I was old, because they act exactly like used to at that age (i.e. hyper, loud, always dancing, talking LOUDLY about their jump-off drama, etc.) and it irritates to crap out of me, to the point it gives me a for real headache.
The only plus is the youngins’ thought off of looks that I was their age, that made me feel pretty good.
@Old A$$ Alise, I feel you on the young’ns in the work place. I am the oldest at my job. Under me its 25, 24, 23. I roll my eyes and think to myself, “wait til your parents stop paying that car note and you get off their insurance, we’ll see how many sales you’ll be hitting up at Banana Republic then.” Oh those carefree days of old.
@Old A$$ Alise, I recently started asking my mom about her arthritis and when she started her change of season, and other female issues so that I can be on the look out. For the record, my mom started early menapause when she was 40, 3 years from my age
@Old A$$ Alise
I hear you. I’m 29 too and one of my major pet peeves with still looking “youngish” is getting talked to by young boys… I swear the other day i went out and some 23 year old guy tried to crack on me. I almost DIED laughing. He was licking his lips at me and everything… in my mind i could only think… was this attractive to me when i was 23??
This is very interesting. VSB is full of old young folk.
@ Luvvie: if you want a winter snuggle bunny, please know he ain’t coming to yo house to ring the bell. You got to get out to meet him.
Same goes for the rest of y’all.
Sleep when you die.
@V.E.G.,
i see someone borrowed the comeback girls blankets today
@The Champ,
Actually I borrowed her pashmina
@The Champ,
Yes, and she dipped it in murky water.
@Luvvie,
the “murky pashmina” sounds like the title of a james bond flick
…or an Austin Powers character rip-off.
@V.E.G.,
Sleep when you die
I am not much of a sleeper so I totally understand that statement.
I wish I liked to sleep but I don’t. So there.
You’re old:
If you pretended that you didn’t learn the souljah boy dance “because it is stupid” when in reality it was just too complicated for your old @ss to figure out.
If you are a woman and you wear a shawl or a cardigan sweater at work to stay warm.
If you don’t own a pair of sneakers that were manufactured in the last two years.
If you get excited about the prospect of a weekend where you will be able to “do some things around the house.”
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
“If you are a woman and you wear a shawl or a cardigan sweater at work to stay warm.”
Naw. I was doing this in school when we first moved to Chicago. Some of us think anything under 75 degrees is cold.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
You are seriously making me reconsider all this youth I’m claiming nowadays. I just finished making this enthusiastic-a$$ list of stuff I want to do around the house this weekend…while I wear my work sweater in my shell-toe Adidas.
Hmmph!!
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, “you wear a shawl”
i’ll be dayum’d…its all in the language…old women call them shawls..I WEAR pashminas that i nicely wrap and sashay over my shoulder for a little warmth, sweetheart.
@The Comeback Girl,
“i’ll be dayum’d…its all in the language…old women call them shawls..I WEAR pashminas that i nicely wrap and sashay over my shoulder for a little warmth, sweetheart.”
LMAO!!!! This was Hilarious!
I don’t know though…Jim Jones wears a Pashmina (albeit Louis Vuitton) and he looks old and weary.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
D NO HE DOESN’T stop that…lol..he wears a scarf with a little dippity do dollup doo dad in the front.
pashminas are parisian and for the ladies.
@The Comeback Girl,
and 5 dollars on every nyc corner. i love this city.
@laylah,
$6.00 in pgh
@laylah, thats a steal for cashmere..imma check out walmart after lunch..see if they got any.
@The Comeback Girl, Im with you Comeback..
and since when does love of warmth make you old anyway.. (pulling cute cardigan more snugly around shoulders.) hmph….
@Shay-d-lady, D is going a little too far..he tryna make us feel old..I rebuke that message up in here today.
***turns on hot steam vaporizer to cut down on all this dry heat up and through. Lord Today.
Jesus be a cough suppresssant and a humidifier***
@The Comeback Girl and Shay-D,
LMAO! Look, you two.. I didn’t force you guys to buy those old-@ss shawls and cardigans! You bought them because y’all two are old. If you were young, you would have bought space heaters or s*xy turtlenecks. Instead y’all said:
Shay-D: “Hey Comeback, you know what we need?”
Comeback: “No. What?”
Shay-D: “We need to get us some old-@ss shawls!”
Comeback: “Hell Yeah! And don;t forget some old-@ss cardigans too!”
Shay-D: “Gee willickers, you’re right! If we get those things, it will be like we are wearing time-machines! YAAAY!”
Comeback: “Yeah…we will be young again…AND WARM TOO!”
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, i rebuke this whole reenactment tomfoolery LOL..
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, AWWW SHYT you done started something with yo ol virgin pina colada drinkin a$$… you and yours probably sleep in twin beds and wear flannel
AND My cardigans be extra fly…..and so are my opaque tights plus
ninja you know you gotta fleece throw around your house somewhere… quit playing and step into the warmth…you know you want to….
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, you stopppid, golly gee willickers. Made me think of “Jeepers Mr. Wilson”.
@The Comeback Girl,
LOL! Note to Jesus: That whole “be a fence” thing ain’t enough
@The Comeback Girl,
Yes…I wear a pashmina that I bought in Paris.
I’ll be dayumed if being chic makes me old.
@V.E.G., V don’t drink that koolaid D tryna pour for us..don’t drink it. I’m young. that is all.
@The Comeback Girl,
We are the same age, I think (I’m 33) so if you are young, I am young. We are young. Yes. And chic!
@V.E.G., yes we are…i claim that errday all day…i am forever young.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
“If you pretended that you didn’t learn the souljah boy dance “because it is stupid” when in reality it was just too complicated for your old @ss to figure out.”
I’m crying over here! This song came out at the end of my senior year… I remember me and my girls trying to figure it out, but we just got tired. We downloaded the instructional video off youtube… that didn’t do us any good. At parties, we would just do the superman part…(but looked adorable while doing it, of course
)
lmao!
***i can’t believe i just fessed up to all of that***
that’s another sign of getting old… you just don’t care anymore. f*** it.
@laylah,
LMAO! The crazy part is that kids can look at that dance and instantly memorize the sh*t. I can’t front, my wife and I used to practice that joint religiously…needless to say we still can’t do it. Now I just act like I find it preposterous that such a silly dance had such a global impact. That’s just the jealousy talking though.
Got my shell toes on today!
“If you are a woman and you wear a shawl or a cardigan sweater at work to stay warm.”
Thats nothing! I was in a staff meeting and a woman left to her cube and returned with a blanket. A full effing blanket! Sad to say she was only 26.
@Dom,
LMAO!!!
“I was in a staff meeting and a woman left to her cube and returned with a blanket. A full effing blanket! Sad to say she was only 26.”
Man she might be young but her mind is older than a muhfugga for real!
@Dom, “I was in a staff meeting and a woman left to her cube and returned with a blanket. A full effing blanket! Sad to say she was only 26.”
I have a blanket on the back of my chair at work that I bought specifically for work…. hey if you work around a lot of computers they tend to keep it kind of cool .again what is with you people hating on warmth? LMAO
@Shay-d-lady,
I just think everything has its time and place. A blanket is cool for the office/cube but in a staff meeting? With invited speakers and such? Pushing the limit and doing too much! The whole room just turned and looked like WTF?
@Dom, yeah I wear my cute cardigans for that..giving the side eye to D Pain.. dont you say nothing bout my cardigans!!!
@Shay-d-lady,
warmth is the ish. i have fuzzy slippers under my desk.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
I digs my Chucks and shelltoes. You wont catch me in Air force ones or Jordans.
“If you get excited about the prospect of a weekend where you will be able to “do some things around the house.” this has defined my life for the past year, since I have been re doing my house.
@Intellectual Hedonist,
That doesn’t make you old. Haters, they all are.
I love home improvement projects, reading shelter mags, watching HGTV…
Young people do that, don’t they?
“Young people do that, don’t they?”
@V.E.G., yes they do if thats the case i been old since i was 22. i read dwell, domino, martha stewart living, blueprint. i dunno if i jump up for joy about home projects, but your home is your sanctuary.
and i do like that little home depot smell in the wood section. (great place to meet single guys by the way-sat mid day)
@The Comeback Girl,
Wow…one foot in the grave. LMAO!
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, but it will be a stylish yet youthful foot please believe that..im not going down wit a shawl. lol
@The Comeback Girl,
YES! I always meet someone in Home Depot. There is always a dude offering to help me select a drill or pick a paint color. And trust I’ve never carried anything out of home depot myself…there is always some helpful gentleman who doesn’t want me to carry a heavy bag.
Also, has anyone noticed that if you have a full cart of groceries at the store.a man tries to pick you up? Hungry negros.
@V.E.G.,
I will attest to that. I always get talked to while in HEB!!!
They are hungry indeed.
@V.E.G., yes im surprised essence magazine doesn’t really explore this whole single guy phenom in there. im not a real fan of ME actually doing any heavy major home changes (ie painting, etc)…but i can change the hel! out of light bulb.
however, i usually go for the plants and bee line on down to plumbing and re-navigate down to the saws and the drills.and sure enough..there are lots of single guys…i dunno HD dudes seem a little more (i can’t explain ) better than Lowes guys.
@V.E.G., LOL I worked part time at the special services desk at home depot… I found it suprising that g.a.y men seemed to flock there….I know why they worked there (one of the only companies in TN that recognizes same s.e.x relationships for benefits status)…but fridays and sundays were like a never ending g.a.y parade..cause yall know the lesbians have that place on lock as well…..
Shay you sure DID wet this HD thread right on up..lol
@V.E.G.,
Safeway Mackin’!!
@V.E.G., I LOVE HGTV Design on a Dime and House Hunters are my ISH!!
“If you get excited about the prospect of a weekend where you will be able to “do some things around the house.”
yeah. i can honestly say that i turn into one of those cats from the home depot commercial when i get the opportunity (and the cash) to make additions to my place
“If you get excited about the prospect of a weekend where you will be able to “do some things around the house.”
*Hangs head in shame, while thinking about the gleefulness of painting an accent wall in my crib this weekend*
…fvck!!!
@AkShone,
LMAO! I should also say that if you have the refinement and insight to paint an accent wall…you’re probably getting old. The youthful don’t know what an accent wall is.
This is defintely worthy of props though.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
Yeah, I guess…well, atleast I don’t rock the ol’ school brown criss-cross flip-flops with church socks and shorts. The day I wear those, they can gon assume I’m on deck for that upper room.
The up-per roooooooom…lol!
Being in the streets of DC during Howard Homecoming made me feel old. I walked out of an all night party because these little b@st@rds kept touching me.
Overly Drunk chicks now annoy me as opposed to the “jackpot” feeling they used to inspire.
I still go out every weekend, but I don’t close the bar every night.
106th and Park causes me to kiss my teeth and change the channel.
My family talks about sex around me.
BTW, P I was at the spot last night, it was off the hook . . . I am going to be frequenting your spot more often.
“My family talks about sex around me”
Thats just sad! And traumatizing.
@Dom,
I can actually cuss (for real, cuss…like, the EFF word) around my parents and not get popped in the mouth.
But Mother still uses euphemisms for s3x around me. Hilarious!
“I can actually cuss (for real, cuss…like, the EFF word) around my parents and not get popped in the mouth. ”
Me too! And I take full advantage of it! If only ten year old me could see me now, Big Thangs Poppin!
“I can actually cuss (for real, cuss…like, the EFF word) around my parents and not get popped in the mouth.”
Ya’ll are brave–I still don’t cuss around my Dad or my proper grandmother. I only say hell or dayum.
Now my G’ed up grandmother, we cuss full scale around her, cause that’s always been our nature.
If she calls you a MF’er, you know she really loves you…lol
Who do you think I learned to cuss from? My WV immigrant mama. Making my ears bleed is one of her favorite pastimes.
I can actually cuss (for real, cuss…like, the EFF word) around my parents and not get popped in the mouth.
i still don’t. i dont think i’ll ever be that old
@The Champ, me either….my momma dont play that shyt….
@Shay-d-lady, yup. i will never be that grown either. i still get a little nervous saying ‘damn’ and ‘pissed.’ me and mama had our first adult fight a couple of months ago and the most i did was raise my voice a little. lol.
i’ve only cursed once while talking to my mama about something that happened to me and she let it go cause i was upset about what had happened at the time but best believe it got mentioned later.
her and my stepdad did overhear me cursing one of my boys out one time but never mentioned it i think because i was REALLY upset (i’m talking red level alert tears and f-bombs). i was so heated i wasn’t even thinking about the fact that they could prob hear me from my room. i was supposed to be driving back to school and my mama just came in and gave me a hug and told me to just lay down and calm down for awhile before i started driving cause i was about to head straight out the door.
@The Champ, me either, my momma don’t play that shyt. my dad on the other hand lol..
@PBG, yeah umm this ain’t happenin round mama comeback..i don’t care if we both in a home sittin side by side in our “shawls”..i can’t cuss around her.
@The Comeback Girl,
My mama is pretty much over anything we do nowadays, as long as it isn’t a detriment to her grandchildren and none of us get dead behind it.
@PBG, i hear ya..my mama is a little prudish..i think she might even believe im still a virgin..we have a pixie dust sorta relationship..
“i think she might even believe im still a virgin”
on second thought this might be a real stretch.
@The Comeback Girl,
My mother held on to that same fantasy until we got to Labor and Delivery w/my second kid.
@The Comeback Girl, lmao I was sort of expecting a “Jesus be a bar of soap to a dirty mouth” sorta signature. I’ve come to love those.
@IVR,
106th and Park causes me to kiss my teeth and change the channel.
I knew I was old when the very existence of BET began to make me cringe. I even avoid going past it when channel surfing. I just skip right over it.
@N.I.A. isonebadmutha…., BET is still on the air. I dont even watch anymore. Just like MTV or VH1
@Intellectual Hedonist,
It was in the Metro today that they cancelled TRL. Bout damn time. I didnt know anyone still watched that show.
@IVR,
BTW, P I was at the spot last night, it was off the hook . . . I am going to be frequenting your spot more often.
I’m glad you enjoyed yourself brotha. I’ll do a better job of pubbing events of note that we have going on. A real good night for folks to come out on is generally Thursdays in the Caverns (underground level) – we have this event called Sound of The City. Live hip-hop band with a DJ…its like the Roots. You never know who will stop by.
Past stoppers by – Jill Scott, Raheem DeVaughn, Bilal Salaam, Kindred The Family Soul (well Aja anyway)…and various random folks whose names escape me thus far. We’re like the neo-soul spot in DC for whatever reason.
I knew I was old when I went to a Greek event and saw all sorts of signs bein thrown up, hootin and hollerin, and other tomfoolery, and I was like “What happened to all the individuals?” And I’m Greek at that.
Some people may not get that one…
@Slim Jackson,
yeah, i think you need to expound a bit, slim
@The Champ,
I go to a party and I wanna chill, post up, maybe sip a drink and holler at some thangs. Younger folk can stroll through the party all night. I, after 1 round, am ready to have a seat. Perhaps an occasional hand gesture, but that’s it.
Younger folks in the wonderful world of Greekdom tend to be a bit more bursty all the time, not that there’s anything wrong with that. You know their org. before you know their names. Older folk, you may not know anything about their affiliations unless you see a license plate or paddle in their house.
The paddle was used specifically for decorations of course.
Another sign that you are getting old (from my perspective):
- you are completely okay with spending more money on clothes and shoes and would rather buy one really nice thing as opposed to 10 cheapy things.
-you start your evening with ‘culture’ (i.e. wed. my girl and I went to a fashion exhibit and reception at the history museum THEN hit the club. Next week I have theatre tickets THEN plan to hit my Tuesday night spot).
@V.E.G.,
also, you forgot to add the fact that when you get older, your spots are “tuesday night” or “monday after work” instead of the perfunctory weekend sh*t
@The Champ,
clubs are cheaper on weekdays and less packed. lol. And there are seats…
@V.E.G., I co sign this post….but I need a nap in between events..LMAO
but on the real I am not a label h.o. but I dont buy clothes and shoes that make me have to purchase a whole new wardrobe each season because the current ones have fallen apart…I also am way more into classic pieces as opposed to a closet full of “this seasons must haves”
When know you’re old when…
-You ask the bouncer at the club, “can you tell the DJ to turn the music down just a smidge.”
-You recommend that when you and your friends get together, yall schedule the outing for early in the day so you can be back home and in the bed by 10.
-You walk up to children, teenagers and young adults cussing and say, “where yo momma at, get her on the phone, does she know you cuss like that. And pull them dayum pants up!!”
-You here people say they graduated from high school in 200? and you are like huh, what? (My boss graduated high school in 2003(smh))
-Your birthday parties went from these all month 24 hour binge drinking extravaganza’s, to these nice quiet, mid-day social gatherings, where you are home by 10.
-You would rather shoot pool, go skating, bowling, or have a grown up slumber party, than go to a club.
My name is Miss Abcde A-Lexus and I am 25+3 and I am old…and lovin it!!!
You here people say they graduated from high school in 200? and you are like huh, what? (My boss graduated high school in 2003(smh))
wow.
@The Champ,
my wow turned into WTF when I found that out. So glad this is a transitional job.
@Miss Abcde A-Lexus,
My boss graduated high school in 2003
wow!
@Miss Abcde A-Lexus,
I mean how does that even happen? 1 year out of college and s/he is a manager?
WoW indeed.
You know you old when:
You ask your son to hook up any new electronics in the house.
You know that you’re old if you can complete this sentence:
pumps and a bump, pumps and a bump, . . .
LOL…Hammer stayed losing after that one.
@AkShone,
Yeah…especially after that video.
Ewww. He’s the last kat I wanna see in a speedo.
@miss t-lee,
who’s the first?
I think I heard Miss T-Lee whisper “Not.The.Champ”
I’m just sayin…I thought I heard that.
@PBG,
CTFU!!!
@The Champ,
I’ll let you know when I think of someone…lol
Forgot to add that you’re old when you are complaining about rap nowadays only talking about bling, bi$ches and the club, your newphew sincerely asks “what other things did rap used to talk about?” SMH
@Luvtheshoes,
you know, i let my nephew listen to “built for cuban links” a few months ago to give him an example of “real” hip-hop. afterwards, he asked “how is this any different? all they talk about is coke, chicks, clothes, and guns too”?
i didnt have an answer, so i asked him if he wanted some waffles. he said “yea”, and we went to go get some waffles and bacon
@The Champ,
ah yes…the purple tape…lol
Well at least you tried.
Here’s why I am an old @ss man:
I am 27 years old (going on 50) with two mortgages a wife and child.
I am happiest when I am hanging with my wife/daughter or building/fixing things around my house.
A family event for us is watching “Dancing with the Stars”, “Grey’s Anatomy” or going to a family friendly restaurant (ie Red Lobster). My wife and I order virgin pina colladas.
I really really want a bathrobe and slippers for Christmas.
I have ten suits but only two pairs of jeans and two pairs of sneakers (for basketball and the gym) because I am old and I feel strange wearing sneakers in public.
I only wear shoes with jeans.
I am looking forward to finding the time to clean out my garage.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, A family event for us is watching “Dancing with the Stars”, “Grey’s Anatomy” or going to a family friendly restaurant (ie Red Lobster). My wife and I order virgin pina colladas.
im with you on this but I dont do the virgin..
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
“I only wear shoes with jeans.”
smh
@Dorian G.,
LOL What’s wrong with that???
On another note Dorian, we share the same name (which is pretty cool because I don’t know any other male Dorians). And because you are clearly a whitty and intelligent brother (which I believe myself to be as well)…I imagine that you are probably like a younger version of me… Or that I am an older version of you.
I have ten suits but only two pairs of jeans and two pairs of sneakers (for basketball and the gym) because I am old and I feel strange wearing sneakers in public.
i play basketball three times a week, and i wear the same black shorts each time. whether or not theyre clean is optional
“i play basketball three times a week, and i wear the same black shorts each time. whether or not they’re clean is optional”
This is disturbing. Them shorts prolly smell like the esophagus of a crack fiend. or a used diaper filled with indian food *shoutouts to Anchorman*
@The Champ,
Funny thing is…a good pair of basketball shorts is all you need. I’ve been wearing the same pair of basketball shorts since 2003.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
yeah. the people who wear fresh and brand new hoop gear all the time are usually the ones who cant hoop
@The Champ and Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, I rebuke your shorts.
oh that’s just nasty.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain, Grey’s Anatomy and virgin Pina Coladas are the shyt!
Things that make me feel old at 29…
1. If I have no weekend plans, I am excited. I used to be sad when I had no events/parties lined up.
2. When I sing to Jodeci in the car, my younger cousins ask me who they are? Seriously!
3. If I go out and dance hard, I definitely feel it the next day as in it is difficult to walk up the steps.
4. I like to go to the store and the mall when they aren’t crowded (weekdays).
5. I am not really big on standing room only locations. That used to be my MO.
6. I used to go places with no idea how I was getting home. I can’t imagine doing that now.
7. Loud young people irritate me. Teenagers just make too much noise.
8. I confused Batman’s sword with Lion-O’s sword from Thundercats. This happened 15 minutes ago.
Things that remind me I am young…
1. I still put sex before sleep, and well, almost anything else (except work…darn does that make me old?)
Aw, forget it.
@The Queen,
“2. When I sing to Jodeci in the car, my younger cousins ask me who they are? Seriously!”
I bought a Run-DMC sweat jacket a few weeks ago and took it home to show it off to my daughter and she screwed up her face and was all like, “Who is that??”
I mean-mugged her lil’ a$$ and sent her to her room for making me feel old.
@PBG, I was playing Fresh prince and Jazzy jeff and the music to Parents just dont understand came on and everyone in the car except me started rapping the theme song from the tv show….
@PBG, I can’t say I blame you. I kept trying to make them remember. Finally I just turned the radio off and had a couple of moments of silence.
@The Queen,
“I confused Batman’s sword with Lion-O’s sword from Thundercats.”
Batman’s sword???? Now I’m confused…
@AkShone, LMAO!! I didn’t even catch that. Poor Queen…she’s even older than she realizes. HAAA! Two points for AkShone.
@AkShone,I too was confused. One of my co-workers said her son was batman for Halloween. She was talking about his sword and I didn’t recall batman having a sword at all. Come to find out, the newer batman does. The batman and robin I remember with kaput and splat being on the screen never had a sword. Strike one for me being old. Then, I thought I vaguely remembered batman’s sword and was confusing him with Lion-O. Thundercats is clearly not a cartoon of today. Strike 2 for being old.
If you and D*Pain don’t remember batman’s sword either, welcome to the old people club. Lmao I had to go to google images to verify.
BTW Champ, you should get the mixes that JayZ did with Linkin Park
@kamakula, I love those
@kamakula,
Now wait a minute, either they have some new stuff with Jigga or (even I know) those are old as he*l! Lol!
well, looks like my contribution to this topic is complete
@kamakula,
i downloaded that a couple years ago
@The Champ,
* CTFU*
Yeah…those are…um…seasoned….
*Pulls into post leaned back in seat with windows down and bass up, blasting TPain’s Chopped and Screwed
*Steps out of whip in fresh dunks and sharp hair line
WHAT UP Y’ALL!!!!
@Dorian G.,
NOW that’s how you make an entrance when you’re young!
I rolled up in an 87 Caddy with my seat leaned all the way up (so that my chin grazes) the steering wheel while softly playing Kool and the Gang’s Jungle Boogie. My windows are up because the cool breeze aggrivates my arthritis.
@Yung$$$ aka D*Pain,
“I rolled up in an 87 Caddy with my seat leaned all the way up (so that my chin grazes) the steering wheel while softly playing Kool and the Gang’s Jungle Boogie. My windows are up because the cool breeze aggrivates my arthritis.”
This may just be the oldest comment YET. lol
@Luvvie,
YES!!! i just laughed all loud in the Panera Bread Company…2520s are straight shook right na! lmao
@Dorian G.,
Now that I’ve met you, I can see you doing that. For real…:)
@PBG,
Now that I’ve met you, I can see you doing that
coincidentally, this is exactly what 8th wonder said to me after i suggested that we try “the poltergeist” **google it**
@The Champ,
where do you get this shyt from…seriously..I went out with 2 2520′s from work last weekend…we took shots while calling out disgusting s.e.x acts and seeing who could guess them… california potato chip, dirty sanchez, strawberry shortcake etc… I didnt know most of that shyt…
@Shay-d-lady,
patrice oneal
@Shay-d-lady,
“the california potato chip”
no.
@Deviant,
i just threw up in my mouth a little…
Oh goodness – I see you doing it, too.
*singin’* That’ll be $60 bucks!
@Dorian G., sit down with yo bougie wing eatin a$$!
@overit, hayyyy booooo!
LMAO @ bougie wings!! They were tasty though!
@Dorian G.,
im SO lovin that song!! im listening to it right now!
For women:
You know you got some age on you if you ask a cutie tryin to holla how old he is 5 minutes into a convo. Happened to me last night.
And you know you are old when you IMMEDIATELY cease all conversation when he strings together a horribly grammatically incorrect sentence (old or elitist).
Lastly, you know you are old when young boys either call you m’am or try to hit on you.
@V.E.G., I had a 19 year old kat try to hit on me.
I was *crying*. He was trying hard with that “age ain’t nothin’ but a number” crap, I was like, you can’t even buy me a drink…are you serious? lol
@miss t-lee,
lmao! awww, poor young one! at least he didnt incur the throat punch…
@V.E.G.,
There is this young guy that is dead set into making me see the wonders of Cougardom. Hilarious!
The first time I saw him I was like: “Does your mom know you’re out all night?”. He was offended and sh*t!
But really, I can’t be bothered.
@V.E.G., lol. this has happend to me twice.
once i was at this lounge watching my boys tear the stage up and this kid comes and stands next to me. i think nothing of it, he’s watching the show. then he starts trying some small talk. ok, whateva. this was a few years back and i don’t remember exactly what he said to take it there but i just looked at him and said, ‘how old are you? are you serious? chile please…go over there somewhere.’
the other time i was working at the sharper image trying to make that extra $$$ during school (undergrad? right before grad? idk), and some kids came in the store. this child seriously came up to me, dragging his leg like he had polio talking ’bout, excuse me ma’am…he got in about 2 words into the rest of his nonsense before i straight burst out laughing. how do you expect anybody to take you seriously on some ma’am
sh!t?!?!
@SouthernGirl,
im LMAO@ at the polio comment!! now THATS how you know youre old!
A number of things convinced me that I was getting old…
1.) My sons. By the same token,they keep me feeling young too. Mainly beacause making jokes and laughing at bodily functions/noises (farting, belching,etc) to mess with with their mother never gets old. My dad is the most distinguished man you’ll ever meet in person but I grew up around his toilet humor and can’t see myself ever growing out of that.
2.) Bad rap music. I haven’t read every post so a lot of folks may have touched on this but I was always a fan of clever wordplay, a beat that makes you instantly close your eyes and nod your head(pref. produced by Primo or Pete Rock)and speaking about an actual topic. (i.e.Main Source’s ‘Peace Ain’t a Word to Play’ or damn near ANYTHING by Gangstarr/KRS-One/Rakim) The stuff that’s out today is straight BASURA. Fo’ real…
3.) Marked decreased tolerance for whiners/complainers. This can probably be attributed to my age,(35) my job(paramedic) and the fact that I’m a parent. I used to be that dude who’d listen to folks b!tch for hours at a time. Now it’s like ‘real talk dude, the reason you ain’t gettin’ ahead in life is because you still on the same West Oak Lane corner I left you on in ’87 smokin’ weed, drinking a 40 (yes, people STILL do this) and tagging walls like it’s your job! Grow up and Man up!’ Or…’Sis, real talk-quit b!tchin’ about not being able to find a good man! They’re out there! My camp is comprised exclusively OF them. Don’t know if anybody’s broken this this to you yet but the lack of good men might not be your problem-YOU on the other hand, just might be.’ Or…’Fam/Sis, real-talk, the fact that you have the flu/cold/nosebleed is no reason for you to call an ambulance! Especially when I’m trying to scarf down my thrice reheated dinner and Elton Brand and the Sixers are on! Stay home from work (if you’ve even got a job) and call your personal physician! The side of my ambulance doesn’t say “TAXI” on it! Here’s a straw- suck that isht up!’
@opinionatedwriter,
3.) Marked decreased tolerance for whiners/complainers.
**nodding head in agreeance***
@opinionatedwriter,
im feelin that! actually, ive always had a very low tolerance for whining and complaining. i dont know why the hell i chose this field?!!?
“Grow up and Man up!’ Or…’Sis, real talk-quit b!tchin’ about not being able to find a good man! They’re out there! My camp is comprised exclusively OF them. Don’t know if anybody’s broken this this to you yet but the lack of good men might not be your problem-YOU on the other hand, just might be.”
***Jesus be a air horn up in here***
i remember when pluto was a planet…
@SouthernGirl,
LOL
@SouthernGirl,
I remember when FUBU was IN, and LL was their spokesperson
@SouthernGirl, CTFU
aww, that’s going to mess me up one day. I’ll be on Jeopardy, in the damn lead, the final category will be “The Milky Way”, thinking I know everything there is to know about the solar system, I’d bet all my money, then get the “how many planets are in our solar system question”, after 29 seconds of thinking, I hastily scribble the number 9 only to have to whack punk 20 years younger scoop the victory from me.
When roboAlex asks me what I thought the ninth planet was and I respond Pluto, I can imagine now, 75% of the viewing audience thinking, since when did a disney dog become a planet. . .
Heck, I’m probably dreaming that they’d even know there was such a dog. . . If I’m lucky, someone would make a convoluted connection that involves Roman mythology and our penchance for naming planets after deities.
@kamakula, lmao!!!
If I have to go someplace public, I feel weird when i’m not in a suit.
My tolerance for BS is infinitesimal. I haven’t gotten to the point where I argue with men, women, sales persons, Peachez @ the House – I just take my time and money elsewhere
@WestIndianArchie,
My tolerance for BS is infinitesimal. I haven’t gotten to the point where I argue with men, women, sales persons, Peachez @ the House – I just take my time and money elsewhere
good point. less and less is actually worth arguing about now.
@WestIndianArchie,
CTFU @ “Peachez @ The House”!
That must be the one w/the real stank attitude that act like she ain’t about her $$$!
Your old when you fall asleep watching the 10pm TV show. EVERY NIGHT.
You’re also old if you remember the premiere episode of ER.
And the other medical drama that premiered the same year (Chicago Hope).
Either that or I watch too damn much TV!!!
except the 10pm shows, of course.
sigh…..
Damn I remeber Chicago Hope! And I liked that better than ER!
@Dom,
yeah, my husband and I did too.
@Dom,
Chicago Hope was my shiznit!! it was way better than ER and i never understood why it went off and ER stayed around so long…
@bballmom, you are old if you remember the first season of the original Law & Order
Aw dayum…check!!!
@Intellectual Hedonist,
who could ever forget mr. big and paulie from goodfellas as detectives
@Intellectual Hedonist,
Guilty as charged!
@Intellectual Hedonist,
Oh my gosh!!
That was my favorite season of the whole series! I still get upset when I think about Paul Sorvino’s character being killed.
Anthony Anderson is really bugging me on the show.
I can’t even watch it when he is on screen.
@bballmom,
or if you remember Maury Povich before it became “You are the Favva (Father)” Show… lol
@Old A$$ Alise,
Oh snap!!! Maury actually used to have topics.
@miss t-lee,
yes, girl!!! him and jenny jones and ricky lake used to all be on around the same time dealin with ish, old school oprah style!
remember oprah’s super big hair and acid wash jeans when she lost weight for the kajillionth time?!?!
@Old A$$ Alise, psssh, how about when springer had actual topics???
@bballmom,
Am I the only one who thought last night’s episode of ER was just a bit pretentious, bringing back Dr. Green in a bunch of spliced up scenes w/Angela Basset’s character. A long a$$ flashback…doin’ too much.
It was fun seeing Drs. Romano and Weaver again, though.
@PBG, It was a little out there. But I did enjoy seeing all 3 of those characters again though.
This could be age or just laziness – but I’ve begun streamlining my time off the couch. If I want a snack/drink/blanket, I’ll wait until my SO gets up and ask for it then. My rationale if I get the side eye is “but you’re already up.” Tee-hee.
@Lil’T,
to me, this is really the only reason to have kids: to get sh*t in the house for you, lol
My sole purpose from 1985 til 1997 was washing dishes and remote control fetching.
totally felt this one. getting something to drink for my moms or some butter pecan ice cream for my dad.
@opinionatedwriter, I love butter pecan ice cream!
@overit, That’s the best ice cream on the entire Earth.
@overit,
ive never had it….im allergic to nuts.
(waitin on champ’s remark)
@Lil’T, f dat..this is still my purpose, to find stuff thats been missin since slavery.
@The Comeback Girl,
how bout in my old apartment (earlier this year) my mother would call me on my cell phone (in my bedroom) to bring her a glass of water (in the livingroom)….aint that some ish! lol
@The Champ,
I will call either Ike or Tina all the way upstairs to get my TV remote off my dresser for me if I’m already in bed.
Whoever didn’t do that has to bring me a glass of water and a biscuit.
I was checking for that Lil Wayne Dedication 3 mixtape, but now I’m looking at getting that new Wayne Brady.
@SouthernCharm,
i think you’ve mistaken this for the “ways to tell you’re losing your hearing” blog
@The Champ,
lmao! its not that bad…he was one steve harvey yesterday pedaling his wares!
@SouthernCharm,
ducking in/…I actually downloaded 2 songs off that joint…/ducking out
I know that I am old at the tender age of 27 because:
1. I was the 2nd person to show up the VSB happy hour and the 2nd to leave.. I couldnt party no more and the drinks were hitting me hard
2. As soon as i got home from said happy hour, I passed out
3. I fall asleep on Friday’s before its time to go out so I only party on Saturday’s
4. My bedtime since the time change has been officially 8:30 .. which coincidently was my bedtime when i was 8! (so maybe I am young?)lol
5. I used to be able to drop 5 pounds in a week with no problem now I have problems losing an ounce in a week..
BUT my knees still work when I need um
so thats a plus!
@jolie fatale,
BUT my knees still work when I need um
so thats a plus!
yeah. kneepads definitely help extend your knee life.
***sorry…i couldnt pass that one up***
@jolie fatale,
“1. I was the 2nd person to show up the VSB happy hour and the 2nd to leave.. I couldnt party no more and the drinks were hitting me hard
2. As soon as i got home from said happy hour, I passed out”
THIS from the same woman who was SWEARING she could handle more liquor than me…lol…i had a couple more shots and some drinks after you left…even got some MORE people drunk…
for shame.
Your “Handle-My-Liquor Card”?
re-voked.
Also, I know I’m getting older when I pull into the gas station and the kid asks me ‘pump your gas for you ol’ head?’
I remember calling other dudes ‘ol’ head.’ Now, I’m him. Crazy.
@opinionatedwriter,
the other day while playing, i was the oldest dude on the court by 5 years. i still dont know exactly how i feel about this
@The Champ,
Yeah fam; I’ve experienced this too. As far as ballin’ is concerned, I know I’m getting too old because all of these young dudes are too busy dribbling the air out of the ball as opposed to using the dribble to actually GET SOMEWHERE on the floor. Too much ‘And 1;’ not enough fundamentals. And too many young dudes eff up the game calling ticky tack fouls. If you’re not unconscious and/or decapitated, there is no foul. Period.
@opinionatedwriter,
yeah, that and1 sh*t irritates the hell out of me. i weep for the basketball young and sh*t
lmao @ injuring yourself during sex…lol
and if you want to stay hip on good new music that wont give you a head ache just visit my music blog on the daily… only the goods are posted there.
http://www.jonesin-eb-style.blogspot.com
@Eb,
Thanks for the playlists and music.
They block mostly all the music sites here at the J.
(except youtube, funny…right?)
*you’ve been favorited* “:)
@Eb,
thanks and sh*t, eb the celeb
I knew I was old but Dayum… y’all are making me feel like i’ve got one foot in the grave
How I know I’m old.
At church this past weekend, I looked at all the college-aged kids and realized i used to BABYSIT them ninjas
I am forever cold and have a lovely assortment of wraps, pashminas, scarves and throws– stored at work, home and my mama’s house
I look at teenagers and sigh to myself “Kids today…. ” while shaking my head
I used to be able to party from thurs to sunday with no thoughts about finances, sleep or responsibilites. Now you better schedule me a month in advance. I need to budget, decide if i need/want a new outfit and figure out if I’m double booking (its happened a lot lately)
I appreciate routine. If anything throws me off my schedule for any reason, I am cranky for days on end.
I CANNOT stomach listening to the urban stations in Philly. 105.3 WDAS (which features Steve Harvey in the morn and Michael Baisden in the afternoon) is the only way to go when I’m not hard-wired to my ipod.
Going to the club has no glamour for me anymore. I’d rather stay at home and try out a new recipie or crochet something or just kick it with my man and close friends. Well this may be a function of being wifed up as well.
If I do get roped into going out, I drive myself so I can leave when i want to. This is usually way earlier than everyone else.
I have more herbal suppliments, vitamins and tonics in my kitchen than the GNC. I can cure whatever is ailing you and the line of pills I take in the mornin is sick. I especially swear by garlic. Keeps you healthy, I say!
I used to be able to drink a grown a$$ man under the table. Now two glasses of wine will pretty much set me up for the rest of the night.
While I will still indulge in a cute pair of shoes (i’m known for my shoe and accessory game) I am much more frugal in my older age than when I was younger and poorer.
All those old wives tales my mom and g-mom used to tell me… I’m starting to believe them!
So where do I sign up for my AARP card*?
*I really want one by the way… they have the BOMB benefits.
@blackberry molasses,
yup. you’re old
oooh true story
I was at work talking to the research assistants in another program. Somehow the topic of Ziggy Stardust came up (I completely forget how, yet another sign I am old). I got so exited and was yammering on about Ziggy, Alice in Chains (Shouts to Alise in Chains) etc and they all gave me these blank stares. They’re all recent college grads.
You know who got up with me in my excitement? Their 50-something year old public health nurse. Yup. I’m ancient.
They only started to get who I was talking about when I mentioned Kiss and Labirynth. They called Labirynth a ‘classic old movie’…. *sigh*
@blackberry molasses,
I will still rock some AIC. They went hard.
@blackberry molasses,
Garlic will keep you healthy. I take odorless garlic tabs along w/my women’s one-a-day. That and my maniacal hand washing obsession (Big Ups to childcare workers’ OSHA training! LOL!) is why I never get sick.
@PBG, daddy overit put me onto garlic. it works!
and honey is that beez nees too!
@PBG,
Public Health Motto
Washing Hands Saves Lives!!!
@PBG,
girl…i messed around earlier this year when i was working at the elementary school and them little gremlins gave me the damn plague!!! i mean, i was on my death bed! fever of 105 and shyt. i thought that was it for me…this is how i was gonna go! lol
they are cute as hell (most of the time) but kids are just swirling cesspools of disease!
your old if “old school” music was the music you grew up on, listened to your cassette walkman, remember when DVD’s came to be, you owned a turn table (not your parents, you), used to listen to 8 tracks.
If I hear one more youngster tell me “scenerio” is old school Im going to throat punch them
and with that I’m out. Have a great weekend everyone.
@Intellectual Hedonist,
thank you, IH. hope your hip replacement surgery this weekend goes well.
@Intellectual Hedonist,
Old is owning a Beta machine. Swear I just threw it out last year when we moved.
@Intellectual Hedonist,
how bout old is owning one of the very first VCP’s! you know, the VCR that didnt actually have the ability to record….or rewind, for that matter!
oh no, not the hip replacement surgery, rude!
am i old for liking slow jams and sade-ish type music, most of the time?
@overit,
No hunny bunny…you’re classic. And that’s where it’s at!
*palin wink*
@PBG, thanks! can’t wait for you to dance circles around me again lol. we are all getting together some time next week:)
@ The Champ, that toe thing sounds like The Gout. You KNOW you’re getting old when you have to worry about medical conditions that have “the” in front of them!
ex. The gout, the whooping cough, the bubonic plague, etc…
But for real, I think I was the youngest recorded case of that s**t in medical history! http://listentoleon.net/index.php/2008/01/02/at-least-its-not-an-std/
@ListenToLeon,
I recall seeing this story on your site. It still cracks me up. Sorry about your luck!
::snicker::
@ListenToLeon,
awww man, that blows!
*sigh* this post is so fitting right now. This week I celebrated my 29th borthday. Last Sat I had dinner with some friends/family in DC. After dinner people were asking me if I wanted to go out- I so badly anted to want to go out, but I couldn’t stop thinking about my sweats and the king-sized bed and grande plasma tv in the hotel room I got for myself (I’m also too old to drive back to Baltimore to DC in the eve lol). The hotel room won- and it as barely 9pm! I got myself a drink at the bar and took it to my room- but I didn’t finish it because I passed out about 15 mins after I (happily) got into bed. So sad. And I loved every minute of it. I also (daily) get really excited about my sofa and sweatpants and catching up on DVR’d shows. I embrace my oldness- mainly because I routinely get mistaken for an early 20′s person- don’t mind getting older if I continue to look younger than my actual age
too old to drive bmore to DC in the eve?
Let me tell you how old you are – I’m old, and my dad drives DC to bmore and back every day, leaves early in the morn, returns in the evening. . .
Champ, you probably had “the gout” as the old folks call it. Next doctor’s appointment you might want to as the doc about your uric acid levels. Gout is usually brought on by excess consumption of protein or saturated fat. It can be exacerbated by being overweight, or by heredity.
Completely unrelated, but for anyone who’s in the midst of a personal recession, you might wanna try this:
http://forums.beyond.ca/st/240856/i-do-not-have-any-money-so-am-sending-you-this-drawing-i-did-of-a-spider-instead-/
**snort**
@KindredSmile, i really needed that kindred. thanks. that sh!t was hilarious…
@KindredSmile,
I laughed so hard I cried! “Can I have my drawing of a spider back please?” just bout KILT ME!
@KindredSmile, that sh*t was hilarious!! I laughed so hard!! It so improved my mood!
I was just talking about this tonight with one of my homeboys (that doesn’t want to fugg me BTW) NTway, why did I go to 3 stores to find neckbones? All of a sudden I felt like cooking neckbones and potatoes and then I made a cake. WTF happened to me? I don’t even have kids, who am I making all that food for and where did I get this irrepressible urge to become the Hoodtastic version of Martha Stewart?
Well I dont know where I fit. Since a kid I always had my eye on what adults were into. I was clearly only watching 60 Min cuase Ed Bradely and his earring looked so cool!
So when I hit my adolesence good bye cartoons and cereal and I havent looked back since.
See since turning 32 I lost 30lbs, judging from Pop dukes hairline I got at least 30 more yrs of hair not receding at all….
fcuk Republicans and Conservatives…I’ll never change on this…age is not why I dont like em
I am from Brooklyn but the cold-once again Pop dukes he has some wierd gene that causes me (and all his kids) to sweat and I mean NO MATTER how cold it is…gimme five blocks and I am un- buttoning that coat thats if I got one on, I rock jackets until NYC gets 35 degree below sorry 51 degrees with wind and rain aint a reason to bust out winter coats!!
I dont hate the teens on the train…but when I was one I didnt ride with them, besides these days my iPod serves its purpose in those moments just like my Walkman and Discman did
I dont get sick…havent had the flu since I think 6th grade…
so I dont really see the signs of my age in these areas its more when you talk to me and I name drop a pop cult reference
**it could help that I dont have kids and I dont live with anyone**
And last I am not that nostaligic over my childhood (outside of music and some movies and a few TV shows I cant get too caught up in memory lane about something that occcured when I was what 9 maybe ten)
…when I think about it the Simpsons premiered the year I turned 13. What was thought to be a kiddie show, cleary is not the sublte (yes left leaning) politics in the show are brilliant..I have been a fan since
I guess if you talk about “the block” and NYC and Brooklyn specificaly I may “sound old” or “date myself” (any Brooklynite over 25 better know about Albee Square Mall) that and sports puts my age out there, youngins get lost when I mention “The Fridge” or “Grandmama” or how the Giants in Super Bowl 20 had a thriller to remember that until last yrs Supe no one thought would be topped (Norwood….WIDE RIGHT!!!)
wow. i’m almost twenty and i’ve got the first two of this one, esp. number 1. lol i feel kinda old until i say my age out loud.
I am waaay older than you, so let me tell you what is coming. One day you will realize that you can’t see far away OR up close. You will realize that you have been guessing who was waving at you from the shape of their head and estimating the right turn based on what you think was the first letter of the street sign. You will also not be able to read menus or memos and you will sit in meetings staring at a fuzzy power point presentations and nodding at what you think are the appropriate times. Welcome to the club.