By most accounts, Tony!Toni!Tone!’s song “Anniversary” is a great song. It was a top 10 song on both the Billboard Pop Charts and the R&B charts when it was released back in 1993 (!). It was on their double platinum album, Sons of Soul, a multi-platinum album which, again, by most accounts was pretty doggone good.
Except I hate both. I own every album by the group except that one. When I found out DJ Quik had produced their song, “Let’s Get Down” I was totally sold. Of course, “Let’s Get Down” sounds a lot like the MC Eiht diss track, “Dollaz + $en$e” but that’s neither here nor there.
Fact is, I HATE “Anniversary”. And considering how that song gets played on people’s anniversaries probably daily at this point doesn’t help. It’s like a stake being driven through my heart, every time.
You want to know why, don’t you?
Of course you do.
Have you seen my copy editor? No?
F*ck it. Mo’ for me.
It was 1993 and I’d just moved to a new school in a new community and had begun gathering friends. Well the best friend of my sister’s new best friend’s cousin’s homegirl had said that she had had a girl that would be great for me to meet. Now, me being the 3 that I am wasn’t always such a hot commodity. Like I said yesterday, I had a little Urkel thing going on. Plus I was short. Like Skeelo’s song “I Wish” was my theme music on some Shaft sh*t.
But I was confident. She went to our rival high school but I wanted to meet her and since I was new, I was still riding high of the new kid buzz. So I meet this young lady, and man is she hot. I was flabbergasted at just how hot she was (turns out she later ended up marrying a very popular Dallas Cowboy). I’m guessing she was less than enthused with yours truly (perhaps I was 2 back then), but she thought I was nice and sweet and all the things little lap dogs are. And her birthday was coming up. So I, Prince Charming, asked her what she wanted and it was that TonyX3 album.
While I may be rich in friends, love, and baseball cards, money has always been a struggle. Basically, I had none but I was determined to get that CD for her. So I begged my parents for the $15 bucks and stole my parents car and drove to the mall to buy the album. On the night of a big football game between our school and hers I planned to give it to her. I’d heard the song “Anniversary” but I’d never really listened to it. Everybody comes back to my house after the game, ole girl included, with my crew of dudes (all football players…sans moi, Urkel) and in show of chivalrous generosity, I give her the CD with a big grin on my face.
She smiled. I smiled. She tore open the wrapping popped in the album to the song, “Anniversary” and played it and began singing. Sounded like an angel to my ears. Until…
…she proceeded to run up to my boy (who she apparently had a huge crush on) and tells him, “one day this will be our song!” and kisses him on the lips.
In my house. In my motherf*cking establishment.
So yeah, f*ck the song “Anniversary” and f*ck Sons of Soul.
At least God, Allah, or whoever you pray too wasn’t messing with me, they went on to date for at least five years.
Well, you’ve heard my story, what songs have been ruined for you because of relationships, love, and alcohol?
Talk to me.
-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL, HE A 3
1) I laughed inappropriately hard @ “ruint.” Still giggling…I’m sleepy.
2) Usher’s “Can You Handle It” is totally ruint. it was “our song” to me and the ex boo. We were at a DST/APhiA ball in 2004 and danced to it, after which he asked for my number. It was all magical at the time, but four years (and a failed engagement) later, the relationship went down in flames.
I’m mad about it cause the song is still really good, but it inevitably makes me think of the ex. I’m over the relationship, but the song still makes that ninja pop up in my head. Sigh…
@Ash, Usher’s “Can You Handle It” is totally ruint. it was “our song” to me and the ex boo. We were at a DST/APhiA ball in 2004 and danced to it, after which he asked for my number.
they was playing nasty songs at your ball!
@Panama Jackson,
LOL! It was 2004 and “Confessions” that deal. Don’t act…
The song I hate is ” Tender Love by the Force MD’s”….
I met a guy at my church and we became boyfriend and girlfriend even though I was not allowed to date so we only saw each other at church and youth group functions…long story short he dedicated the song to me, but showed up to a church function with another girl and they were wearing matching shirts with their names airbrushed on them! When we got in the van to go on our youth group trip he pops in a mixed tape he made and that was the first song….she turns to him and says “awwwwww its our song!” I wanted to choke the life outta’ them both right there in front of Jesus!
@WonderWoman, oooh, that’s just evil! And lmbo @ those airbrush shirts, whewwww, semi-tragic!
@Anike Love, It was evil…but, it turns out F.J. was a straight up buster! He lied and said we slept together when I was still a virgin…Still hate the song though….Lol
Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On” for no other reason except it being played out and conjuring images of poor Leo freezing to death and the old couple holding each other as their cabin fills with water.
*Tear*
And VIvian Green’s Perfect Decision. This song seemed so appropriate when I was dating an ex-friend turned ex-lover, but now it makes my skin crawl to hear this song cuz I think back to those moments. Yep, I pretty much loathe him now.
Ooops, that was an accident!
@WonderWoman, that is my SONG. i would be so heated if someone ruined it for me.
grrrrrrrrr! lmao @ the airbrushed shirts. i had a few myself, and was so excited about them i learned how to airbrush…anyone want an airbrushed tee? lol
@overit, Yes I do! For real!
@WonderWoman, wouldn’t nobody make me hate that song. NOBODY I TELL YOU!!!!
i wish a motherf*cker would!!!!!
@Panama Jackson,At least I can still listen to “Love is a house”……
First time commenter, long time reader and always inspired to go in on some of ya’ll’s subjects.
But my “ruint’ song?
“If It Isn’t Love” by New Edition.
The fact that this was the song playing in my head during the end of my first college romance kinda stuck. So I made it my ex’s ringtone. Only problem was, my boys heard the song and then proceeded to put me through what we always will forever term an extended period of time in a car and somebody’s iPod is in the hands of another person and they play all the “relationship songs”: iPod Hell.
Imagine getting beaten down by not only New Edition, but Usher and Blackstreet and all the other sangin’ ass negroes for an extended period of time.
Of course I’m over it now and the song is now a karaoke staple for me and my boys. But from 2007-08, every time I heard Ralph T. begin, “I don’t love her…” I immediately wanted to sock him, Johnny Gill for doing backup and then the rest of the dudes for doing the bridge part.
Ugh. f*ckin’ Ronnie, Ricky, Johnny, Ralph & Mike…
@Brando, Ugh. f*ckin’ Ronnie, Ricky, Johnny, Ralph & Mike…
lmao, this whole comment had me dying. sorry, boo.
@Brando, welcome and sh*t
man, i might have to kill a woman who ruint New Edition for me. i just couldn’t live with that kind of heartache.
@Brando, This is HE-LARI-US! I had to let out a laugh on that one!
That is all
@Brando, that’s terrible, because i love that song.i played that cassette so much that i wore it out. i daggone near memorized the choreography in the video. (but not really)
I love how everyone’s story deals with some sort of “forbidden love.” Mine starts along the same vein, where I was “talm to” this boy for a while and basically went out with him under the guise of “group outings.” Yeah, they were there too, but we sat behind everyone else (No below the neck contact- first rule of Beez Club). Enntehwehhh…
There was a sweetheart dance and I was all primed and ready to go, then Mama Beez tried to change the game RAHT befo’ I was posed to go. Being the obedient middle child I am, I calmly assured her I’d have a ride there and back (his sis) and that we’d be home right after (well, after a meal). After a threat of rebellion she never seent coming, she agreed to my terms. *cue angel wings*
At the dance, we were connected at the hip, and Ron Isley’s “Contagious” came on, and I SWORE it was advanced like. He looked me in the eyes so intently, we sung along to the song, we were great… Until he found someone who went further than the 1st rule of Beez Club, and thought he’d keep me along for the good look (I did have a lot going for myself).
Now, I hear that song, and I wanna punch a baby in the stomach, and eat it’s candy in it’s face while doing the Sanctified Slide.
*head tilt*
@Beez,
NOT advanced like!! bwahahahaha uber-advance like it!
@Beez, lol @ the sanctified slide.
Kissing you by faith. Dating a wack a** wackster who tried to lock me in a trunk…literally
I never felt this way by brian mcknight dated a “singer” he sang the song @ a talent show supposedly to me but I think it was prob the dude behind me
@shay-d-lady,
“who tried to lock me in a trunk…literally”
I know this is not funny but .. i simply couldn’t help myself?
@shay-d-lady,
*plays role of annoying ass teacher: expand and elaborate your answer for 10 points. Dooble-vay-tay-eff? (WTF???)
@keisha brown,
Dooble-vay-tay-eff?
Gotta love the french spelling. Hilarious!
But for the new VSBers, please refer to old VSB entries for tales of the Shay-d-lady herself… or just go on to her blog. She is HIGHlarious!
@Sula,
lol. have to put my years of french immersion education to use! my girl and i will buss out in french every so often..sometimes things just sound so much better in french (or spanish).
*goes to google shay-d-lady…
@shay-d-lady
Yes, um, If it’s not too traumatic, you could elaborate…a TRUNK?
@shay-d-lady, I’m sorry, you can’t just put some ish like this out here & then leave us hangin & whatnot….PLEASE…this will bother me for the rest of the day..UNLESS of course, it still gives you flashbacks & well it should!
@shay-d-lady,
You really have to get a book written. The sh*t u be saying is outlandish
@Plain Ole Peyso,
lol yes, like ASAP. me and my girls are starting a book club and shay-d’s collection of “series of unfortunate yet ridiculously, outlandishly, couldnt-be-true-from-anyone-else-but-shayd, wild and hood events” is at the TOP of my list of suggested books.
so um yeah, get on that. please and thank you.
@shay-d-lady,
***College friend/Part-Time Roommate Alert -***
WAIT!!!!
I would think that song when you were d*mn near choked by a strawberry at that talent show LMAO!!!
@shay-d-lady,
LOL! Your comments always make me smile. The wankster was singing to another dude?!?! WOOOW…..
What’s up with dude trying to lock you in the trunk?!
@shay-d-lady, i effing love you.
the end.
ps) write that book.
@shay-d-lady,
Not the dude behind you?!
Tragic!
Daaamn! That was thoroughly enternaing. Painful for you – comical as hell to me, though. Time’s sposed to heal all wounds, but methinks you need a hug…
And ya betnot say hug deez cuz I just might reply, ” O-tay!”
Robin Harris once joked that you never want to get beat to a soundtrack (in his case, a skipping record) cuz it never ends, well, Vol. 3… Life And Times of S. Carter, was big in Spring 2000, I cant listen to that cd without flashbacks……smh
@Blacklaw,
I see you Sandz…
I see your Vol 3: Life and Times and raise you several Dungeon Fam albums (Kast, Goodie Mob, etc.)…gotta admit tho, I eventually stopped hearing music altogether while I focused on a certain point on the wall.*shudders*
Any and everything by Floetry.
So serious.
I had this boyfriend, who I fell in love with, who was in love with his ex, who left me for his ex, and then after she rejected him, he wanted to marry me. Yeah, right.
But yea. Our song was “Have Faith”, and essentially the only thing we could ever agree on to listen to in the car was Floetry. To this day, I can’t listen to them without clenching my teeth and wanting to do a drive by on a military base where he resides.
So yeah. F*ck Floetry and f*ck him.
…did I mention that he was cheating on me with her during half the relationship? He figured the best way to apologize would be to dump me the day before my birthday (which coincidentally was his birthday too), and try to still be my friend. When he dumped me, I was visiting friends in STL. Talk about a damper.
So yeah. One of many relationships that left a sour taste in my mouth. And I will never discuss this again.
@chaoticdiva, I have to co-sign on your story. I can not listen to Tyrese’s “One” or Keisha Cole & Jaheim’s ” I’ve Changed for You” because it reminds me of my ex, who had a plan to get me pregnant the entire we were together. (like seriously, my BC pills would have fewer each month or condoms breaking every time, I got an IUD without telling him.) He proposes to me at a family event only to dump me the day before we were going to the justice of the peace because his “heart wasn’t with me.”
Oh and now I cant listen to Mary J Blige’s, “Not Gonna Cry” because it reminds of me later on that day….throwing clothes over a balcony and urged some junkies to steal his playstation etc.
@MissingBerlin,
So it’s folks like you that I can truly thank for my best crackie come ups? Thankcha!!!
Sorry so traumatic, tho. Thank God he ain’t get you a baby before he bounced…
Save Room- John Legend. An engagement gone wrong claims a good song.
Love hurts sometimes when you do it right? No f*cking kidding.
OH MY GAWD, Panama!! Your story broke my heart. That was just….
WOW! The nerve of her!
Anyways,
Just like an entire album has been “ruint” for you, since 2003 Who Is Jill Scott? Words and Sounds Vol. 1 is pretty much unlistenable for me now. And I loved that album too… *pout* {Thanx a lot, Aaron!}.
@Made In Hawaii, Yeah, I feel you. You pretty much gotta be in love or indifferent to listen to this album. But if you are heart broken or longing to be in a relationship, you’re better off drinking hot bleach. This is one of my favs, but I couldn’t listen to this album for a long time. Then she got divorced and I was thinking, “Yeah, now Jill is gonna pour her heart and soul into some heartbreak music.” And what did she give us? Crown Royal and Epiphany. smh
I HATE Lost Without You by Robin Thicke!!! Before my current boo and I dated it was the ringtone for his b!tch of a girlfriend. It’s sad because up until then I really liked Robin Thicke and that song in particular.
@Behold A Lady,
Wait, what? He still had that ringtone for her while ya’ll were together?
D@mn homie…this was just tragic. But, I think every decent man’s adolescence is characterized by some story of unrequited or unrecognized ‘like/lust/love’, whatever the case may be…these situations help us develop a thick skin against potential rejection (at least among the 3s and lower). still tragic tho’…d@mn.
Moreover, your story reminds me why I don’t believe in buying a woman a drink. Same principle and all….I digress.
Songs that are ruint for me: ANYTHING by H-Town…Knockin Da’ Boots…Silver Bells…doesn’t matter. Ain’t no story of heartbreak or anything like that. I just never cared for H-Town (how you gonna insert ‘baby’ into a Christmas song: “I”m talking ’bout Christmas time, baaabbyyy”….negritude knows no bounds, I tell ya’)
@DG,
this is the most…
LOL. it made me laugh. that is all.
A young P. had known a young woman since they were four years old. Let’s call her R., since that’s her middle initial (and P. obviously has a thing for middle initials given his handle). Anyway, P. really really liked R., and even in 2nd grade he knew she was special. Special enough that R. was the first woman P. ever associated with a song – Earth Wind And Fire’s “Can’t Hide Love.” P. didn’t hide his love, and he knew that it was about time for her to stop frontin’ and hiding hers. Eventually P’s undisclosed master plans worked, as they, now in middle school, were doing their thing together, and P. declared “Can’t Hide Love” to be their song. She agreed, and they’d sing it to each other in the hallway and sh*t and whenever they were together doing whatever it is that middle schoolers
dodid (there’s no telling what they do these days).Fast forward a few years to the first year of high school, P. finds himself nostalgic reminiscing about R., who has moved across the country. He seeks out a mutual friend to find see how R. is doing, and finds out that she creeped on him with the former homie.
P. was never one to let things faze him, but he’ll admit that it cut a little deeper than he thought it would. Fast forwarding eight or so years later to the present, R. doesn’t look nearly as good as P. projected her to, plus P. has a very beautiful girlfriend of his own. While he takes solace in the fact that in the end he got the win plus if nothing else he helped put a sista on to some good ass music like Earth Wind and Fire, P. can’t help but remember R. for a quick second whenever he hears those opening notes of “Can’t Hide Love.”
@P., Damn son…..i feel for you….
side note: what junior high kid was banging earth wind and fire? u was ahead of ur time killah….
@Blacklaw,
i was thinking that… like middle school and grooving to EWF?
that’s good parenting right there. i used to sing anita baker, EWF, and temptations songs because that’s what my parents listened to. lol
@Muze,
Same here. My earliest memory of going to my grandmother’s house with my dad is listening to Maze and Anita Baker in the my dad’s Ford Ranger. Now, that is my traveling music, especially “Golden Time of Day”.
@ComicBookGuy,
i love maze! went to a concert with mi madre a couple of years ago and had a blast. she was so proud that i knew dang near all the lyrics to all the songs. lol
@Blacklaw,
I listened to whatever my parents had. Ya boy would throw on some EWF, Maze, or Stevie Wonder literally every morning while I got ready for school.
I bump some good ass music, that’s what good parenting and having older siblings is all about.
John Legend’s Get Lifted album.
He said he related to the songs sooo much.
When someone tells you who they are, believe them.
@KaNisa,
lol. I heard that.
@KaNisa,
O-K-K-K!
i got a few…
‘teach you a lesson’ (robin thicke)- i was dating a teacher, so of course made this the theme song. except i was the only one interested/ready to do adult things like..HAVE a relationship. womp, womp, womp…
‘you’re the one i love’ (jesse powell) – THE song my ex dedicated to ME…THE ex I was going to marry…
‘love lockdown’ – was dating a dude who was an ugly but attentive rebound for me, he’d come into my house blasting that same damn song over and over. they are called personal headsets for a reason right?
‘best i ever had’ (drake) – I assigned to a dude that gave me literally THE best I’d ever had (to date). and on a visit to see him got punked off in the worse way. i also hate crowne plaza hotels for this reason. the #epicfailtality of this video also ruint the song for me.
sidenote: don’t you HATE when you love a song..then the video comes out and just upsets your spirit?? smh (aka so much hate).
i have whole relationship soundtracks..so i’m sure there are plenty more…thats all i gots for now.
@keisha brown,
Yes with the videos!
I get a similar feeling when think I like a song b/c of the snippet that gets played on a commercial/movie trailer and then I hear the whole thing and just get utterly disappointed. Apple has ruint my spirit on multiple occasions w/ this shiggidy.
If someone starts their ‘we need to talk’ discussion with you by saying, “You know that song Where I Wanna Be by Donnell Jones….” you are probably not gonna leave that conversation happy.
Like how do u use the actual song lyrics to facilitate the break-up? Can’t switch it up or anything?
@kidSistah,
don’t even get me started. i think Donnell broke up A LOT of relationships with that dang song. *adds that to my list*
@kidSistah,
LOL! That Donnell Jones album was CLASSIC! That has damn near every relationship-dating scenario I had incurred when it came out. Good look…
Bond.
@kidSistah,
Oh. my. gosh! When my brother, his best friend/frat & myself lived together, I always knew when my brother and his girlfriend {now wife} had broken up because he had that damn Where I Wanna Be on friggin’ repeat for days until they worked something out. It would be all jokes between his friend and I in the beginning but after a while, we just wanted to send him to his car w/ that song.
My brother “ruint” that song for me. *smh*
JT Money – Ho Problems
It was if he was talking directly to me.
@Kirk Lazarus, having never heard this song……that gave me chuckle
You should have asked your friend to reimburse you. Like once they started dating…
“Can I Walk with You” by india.arie
I LOVED that song because I was “in love”(or crazy). My junior year in college and I thought he was the truth, and that he was so real…but then turns out he was crazy and had mommy issues and he broke up with me while studying abroad.
It took a good 1.5 years before I could hear his name(an all too popular name) and the same amount of time before I could forgive india.arie for filling my head with her catchy, beautiful lyrics.
One song on a mix CD that an ex made for me was hard for me to listen to. The song is “Remember the Love (Battle of the Beats Remix)” by Adriana Evans. As the song says, “No one else will ever love you more than me”… I’m sure he believes that and the song sounds a little condemning because what he thought was love wasn’t healthy. That said, I try not to let a perfectly good song get tainted by a memory. Now, I think of the song as the theme of “Noah’s Arc” and me moving well beyond a bad relationship.
Oh, and “Ex-Factor” by Lauren Hill had me singing that ish in the car, driving with tears in my eyes. Damn she said a mouthful when she said “It could all be so simple, but you rather make it hard.” I just wanted a lil reciprocity…
^Now in keeping with my earlier post, this is still a damn good song so I put a positive spin on it as well and will still sing it.
@legitimate_soul,
omg this is my “ruint” song for me too and i didnt even remember until you mentioned it! all these repressed emotions are starting to come back. actually the song that was ruint first was “Nothing But You” on that album, since it was “our song”. but “Ex-Factor” mirrored what happened after the storm…
*story time*
my sophmore year in HS, i was in advanced like [(c) Beez] with this guy who had graduated the year before. he was very popular at our school, a football player, type that dated cheerleaders. so i had class with his cousin (another popular football player) and we became cool, and thru him we met (he would have never paid attn to me otherwise, i was a bank geek!). we immed hit it off and spent tons of time together. he’d come to my house or id go to his (since i wasnt allowed to date yet). a couple times my parents took us out to eat (group date w/ the parentals?? yes. *smh*). sometimes he’d be waiting for me after school. he was always telling me how much he liked me. he bought me LH’s “Miseducation” and said “Nothing But You” was our song because it described our sitch (which it didnt but i liked hearing him say it lol). i thought things were perfect! until this negro had the nerve to say one day “i think im falling for you. but im just not ready for another rel’ship right now.” me: cool. i like things the way they are. a week or 2 goes by and i dont hear from him (dude would usually call like 3 times a day). next time we talk he tells me he’s dating some chick. it seems like “Ex-Factor” starts immediately playing in the background. i was sad and mad because i felt lied to. i got over it but ive never liked hearing “Ex-Factor” or “Nothing But You” again because of him.
oh and a few months after i found out hed moved on i find out girly is preggers. *smh* good thing i didnt put out, cuz it mighta been ME!! lol
@Gem of the Ocean, “advanced like”? Is this some regional slang that we didn’t have in the south? Does it mean ya’ll “go together?”
aww PJ that sucks! did you kick them out? take the cd out and break it over your knee wrestlemania style? i’d have had to do something.
anyhoo…man. i have a bunch. i incorporate music so much into my life, it’s as if every moment has a soundtrack. and i’ve had some effed up moments, i tell ya.
‘i wanna love you’-donnel jones.
‘where i wanna be’-same relationship ruining crooner
(first bf whom i was with for 6, yes 6 long arse years. first was our song… second was the song he broke up with me with on our 2nd breakup. lol.)
‘silently’-maxwell (not even going to revisit why)
‘my first love’-avant and keke wyatt? (dude i dated and was head over heels with in college still calls this our song and says i broke his heart so he still can’t listen to this. so, kinda ruined it for me too.)
‘beautiful surprise’-india arie
‘whoknows’- musiq
(sigh. the person whom i thought was my beautiful surprise dedicated whoknows to me… then we found out what it was that whomever knew, knew… we weren’t going to be more than ‘friends’. …i was friendzoned by someone who STILL says he loves me everyday. ergh.)
‘beauty’- dru hill (some horrible guy left this on my voicemail when ppl still did that. he was crazy and it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. still.)
‘ex factor’-lauryn hill. (“no matter how i think we grow, you always seem to let me know, it ain’t working…” <—this line was my life for said Beautiful Surprise above.)
‘cater to u’-destiny’s child. (lapdance i’ll never give again. sigh.
@Muze,
oh. and how can i forget ‘cater 2 u’ by destiny’s child.
i think every woman has given a lapdance to this song at least once. least all the women i know have. original, right? lol. memories of mine are ruined forever though…
i wanted to make my ex feel special and cater to him that day… thought it would be fun. i cooked his fav food and a few extra aphrodisiacs, cleaned up, drew a bath for him, and wanted to start the evening’s festivities off with a sweetly sensual dance. had no pole or upside down splits in mind… do you know this ninja said he didn’t want me “acting stripperish” and turned his nose up at my vicky’s secret-clad body?
yeah… about that. should’ve given him a ‘stripper deez’. lol.
@Muze, Clearly he was gay. You’re lucky to be without him.
@QueenT,
right. i think he likes boys. way way secretly though. at the time though… i just felt soooo rejected. lol.
oh well. on to TNN.
@Muze,
“i think every woman has given a lapdance to this song at least once. least all the women i know have. original, right? lol. memories of mine are ruined forever though…”
I won’t comment on another man’s sexual preferences, but clearly something wasn’t right with dude. That being said, please, PLEASE don’t let that experience sour you on giving lap dances…I’m speaking on behalf of the next potential man. Just know that the chance of that happening is something like 1 in a million.
That is all.
@DG,
Yeah…he sounds suspect as all get out…lmao
@DG,
lol. yeah i’ve tried to not let it ruin future experiences because frankly whomever should receive such treatment will appreciate it, dangit. …or they won’t be receiving such treatment.
i was self-conscious for the remainder of our relationship. lingerie was a no-go…nothing overtly sexy or sexual bc i thought he’d reject me again. prude.
whew. glad that’s over. lol.
look back, like was i on crack? was i on that?
@Muze,
funny thing when you are dressed like a vic secrets model and you get rejected by a dude..people (men) don’t believe it! like i’d make that type of sh*t up or something. smh..
lol @ stripper deez..
Kind of off topic, but not,
Songs About Jane by Maroon 5 is like the perfect relationship album. The songs can cover the length of a relationship from “This Love” to “Sunday Morning” to “Sweetest Goodbye” and “Through With You”. Fortunately none of these songs have been ruined. Yet.
@KayBeezy, That’s a cool CD. In keeping with your theme of a relationship album, Wake Up Call would have rounded it out quite nicely…but then again, that might be going a bit too far. No one needs jail time, but I respect the sentiment.
LOVE music too much to let anyone ruin any song for me, myself & I …although perhaps if I had had a similar experience to yours Panama I may have had to rethink this, but now your longstanding standard “whatever deez” makes perfect sense…such a bad experience at such a tender young age….so in the spirit of i really am feelin you on this …eff her & her effed up dallas cowboy spouse…..
Don’t Cry, by Guns and Roses.
This song/single was mailed to be by my first and last 2520 boyfriend after his family sent the police to the “hood” where I lived to “retrieve” him. His family is wealthy and politically and was not having a “darkie” in their family. They shipped his arse off to a boarding school.
Fast foward 13 yrs, friends with him and his new wife had the pleasure of looking at her 6+ carat engagement ring photo (her pic) when she in boxed me to say he still had a pic of me in his wallet
@FiveFivewithbrowneyes,
womp on many parts of this story (the police? really? it’s that serious?) and pic of you in the wallet!!!
@Keisha Brown,
Yes ma’am. Welcome to the Confederate South were gun racks and confederate flags are STILL displayed on their chevy and ford trucks.
And yes, she said he still had an old pic of me in his wallet is how she recognized me when I requested him as a friend on facebook. She was passive aggressive in our lil chat so I had to look him up and do naughty things with him before his marriage. Wrong I know, but it is what it is.
@FiveFivewithbrowneyes, Wow your story just reminded me of my own 2520 puppy love tale. We attended the same day camp in the ‘Burgh for 3 years in a row, but when I turned 13 I became a CIT (counselor-in-training) and he was still 12 and a camper. So, our love was forbidden for many reasons. 1) we had this mutual understanding that young interracial couples might get cut in the North Hills in the 80′s and 2) CITs weren’t allowed to date campers. (go figure…i mean we were literally 1 year apart. but whatev…) Anyway, we would find ways to communicate under the pretext of ‘camp fellowship’: late night camp by the fire every wednesday, recreational swimming, and stuff like that. we never kissed, we just mutually pined for each other for a little over 2 months during that last summer together. (btw, once you turn 13, you can no longer attend). The last day of camp, he handed me a tape and on it he professed his love for me and stuff and then recorded a copy of “I Won’t Forget You” by Poison. I thought it was the sweetest dedication ever. But then just like that…he was gone. I never saw him again, and unlike previous years we didn’t write letters to each other during the school year. His folks were divorced, so he lived in NJ during the school year…I wonder if he’s on facebook. hmm….
@Miss Patterson,
Thanks for “getting it” and knowing that it can be THAT SERIOUS; especially when you live in a place where interracial dating is few and far between (back then) and a person has a very wealthy prominent family. It was not going down. And his grandfather was mayor so it wasn’t hard for him to send a cruiser to snatch dude up.
@FiveFivewithbrowneyes, yeah. folks don’t realize the power & significance of young love. dang.
Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On” for no other reason except it being played out and conjuring images of poor Leo freezing to death and the old couple holding each other as their cabin fills with water.
*Tear*
And VIvian Green’s Perfect Decision. This song seemed so appropriate when I was dating an ex-friend turned ex-lover, but now it makes my skin crawl to hear this song cuz I think back to those moments. Yep, I pretty much loathe him now.
Mariah Carey’s song We Belong Together is ruined for me because the dude who claimed that was “our song” cheated on me. I guess he changed the lyrics of the song without me knowing. LOL
For a long period of time, ANY song by ANY Carribean artist just made me cringe!
You see, ex-boo and I spent 3 months planning a beautiful vacation to spend a week on a Carribean island. About 3 weeks before departure, he tells me that his mother’s health is deteriorating and that he’ll need to fly to his hometown the week of our vacation to assist his family in caring for her. So out trip… it’s canceled. *Sad*
About 3 weeks post planned vacation that was cancelled, I discover plane tickets stubs in his bedroom with the dates and destination of what I thought had been a cancelled vacation….a MAJOR confrontation ensued. Comes to find out, he lied about his mother being sick so he could take his ex on OUR vacation instead.
If I could have murdered that ninja right then and there and gotten away with it… I dont think I would have hesitated!
For months afterwards, any song by a Carribean artist just made me want to slap the black off the nearest ninja in the hopes that the ex would feel the pain vicariously.
@More is More,
O.M.G.
you officially win for most effed up story. i’d have went all Kill Bill and started throwing knives at his arse. wow.
@More is More, What an A**Hole! He is lucky he’s still alive.. LOL
@More is More,
Oh heyll naw.
@More is More,
Real talk, that is some bullsh*t.
@More is More, Damn. Just Damn.
@More is More,
anyone who uses their mother’s health as a reason to get out of sh*t should suffer bad repercussions. that’s just ASKING for karma to come visit your house. his momma shoulda beat him!!
@Keisha Brown,
Agreed!
@More is More,
He had to have had some kind of favor from God beause nothing would’ve stopped me from putting him in at least a 3 month a coma.
@More is More
You might need to be put up for sainthood. He messed with your heart and my first love-travelling? Ah, but nah.
Yes, yes… He was truly God’s child that day; that’s the only explanation for why he’s still breathing. As they church says: “God protects children and fools”.
Anyways, thinking back on it now, I should have at least keyed his car and flatted all his tires. Yeah… he definitely deserved that. And seeing as Pops is an attorney, I would have had free legal representation and could have gotten off by pleading “I-wish-a-ninja- would” temporary insanity.
@More is More,
“I-wish-a-ninja- would” temporary insanity.
Best insanity plea I have ever heard!
Panama…I feel your pain man…that’s all I wanted 2 say, that’s some f***d up way 2 go out. And Anniversary is suuuuuuch a great song.
Your post reminds of the song “Grudge” by EMC, never forget my man!
That Lauren Hill song almost gets me emotional…almost… Why Cleff?
Not really ruined my life but irritates me, “Kiss me through the phone”. Had a little crush on a friend, but she was dating this little punk from out of town. He was playing her, I peeped his game from the get go tried to warn her but you know how sistaz get.
Anyway she came into my office one day singing that song, and it made a Ninja wanna to flip out and give someone a death touch.
Dag, Panama, I feel you. How dare she do that to you? She knew what it was. She carried you….
Anywho, “Lets Stay Together” by Al Green…because it was the first song my ex and I danced to at our wedding. Now, when I hear it, its just like an immediate turn-off, it puts me right back in that moment that I would rather not be reminded of.
One of my favorite songs of all time “You Got Me” by The Roots. My summer “boo” and I had the best first date, ending with us just chilling in the car talking and listening to music. That whole night felt like we were reading each others minds and this was the beginning of something amazing. At the end of the song when ?uestlove goes in on the drums….we both blurted out “siiicccckkk” at the same time. And from then on every time I heard the song I thought about him. Eventually he got “too busy” and we ended, there’s really no dramatic story, I would say we’re still associates. But it just annoys me that such a great song reminds me of such an unimportant person in my life.
Usher “Think of You”
My first boyfriend gave me this cassette single(!), and I musta played it dayum near ’til the tape snapped. Once we broke up I couldn’t stand to listen to it.
Most of Bun B’s Trill album, especially “Pushin’” and “Get Throwed”. This was one of my friends favorite albums right before he died, and when I hear most of those songs I think about him getting extra hype and get a lilttle sad.
D’Angelo’s “Send It On” and “One Mo Gin”.
The kat who had me dyckmatized in ’01 used to love him some D’Angelo.
I can’t even listen to him anymore without getting a little disgusted.
Oh yeah PJack, didn’t get to check in yesterday, but I saw the copy editior suggestion. Can I offer up a special pre Spring Break edition *throat punch* for that person? Kthnx.
@miss t-lee,
NOT the cassette single!! lmao wow, those were the days, boyyyyy.
@Gem of the Ocean,
Yep. 1994.
Dayum.
@miss t-lee, 1994? wait, is this where i play along and say “yup, 1994 girrrl”. or do i admit that i was playing “if it isn’t love” in 1988. or is the mention of 1994 the pinnacle of cassette tape design. which one?
@Miss Patterson
CTFU. All the above.
Naw– I was just mentioning that it was the year I was wearing that song out…lol
I know exactly which year you were playing “If It Isn’t Love”…I was doing the same exact thing.
@miss t-lee,
I love that you shouted out the cassette single! I still got mine. Troop’s “All I Do Is Think Of You” with “Spread My Wings” on the flip side, Tevin Cambell’s “Alone With You”, Boogie Monsters “Recognized Thresholds Of Negative Stress”, etc. etc.
@legitimate_soul,
“Troop’s “All I Do Is Think Of You” with “Spread My Wings” on the flip side”
Holy isht! I still have that one too.
Hilarious. I refuse to part with my cassettes. They’re just chillin’ in the back of my closet in a milk crate.
@legitimate_soul, awww i love those songs by Troop. no one ruined those, thank God!
“Heaven” by John Legend .The GF, Miss Moneypenny, started comparing her life to what her friends and decided we need to “take a break”. I said how about we just break up. So I’m pissy and belligerent and I add this song to my MySpace profile. She the comments on my page something to the effect of “Wow that’s a nice song.” So I’m thinking why are you trying to talk to me and “Wow I just saw a nice train for you to jump in front of.”
F*&k you John Legend. I hope Kanye leaves you for a white girl… wait a minute he already did.
@Wuyoung Agent of M.E.,
just haaaad to drag my boo Yeezy into this huh.
@Muze,
I saw a chance for a kidney shot on Yeezy and I took it. I’ll leave his beard Amber out of this.
@Wuyoung Agent of M.E.,
LMAO. so wrong.
@Muze,
just haaaad to drag my boo Yeezy into this huh.
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight?
Wuyoung, please leave ‘Ye alone!!
@Wuyoung Agent of M.E., LOL!
@Wuyoung Agent of M.E.,
*you looooose….
LMAO!
@Wuyoung Agent of M.E.,
LOL @ “Wow I just saw a nice train for you to jump in front of.”
@Made In Hawaii,
Let’s be honest, I’m not the only person on this site who has wanted someone to Anna Karenina themself before. Nothing permanent, just for a little while.
ahhh that was COLD young LOL yeah I”d hate that song too LOL……. that Ghostface joint “baby” is always skipped over, why you ask? ,because someone I loved with every fiber of my being knocked up another chic, and a daughter they have, so yeah….nothing like that kind of pain. and I don’t need reminders in songs.
“Where I Wanna Be” Donnell Jones
Senior year I dated one of the star basketball players. I didn’t ball myself that year b/c I shifted my focus to volleyball, but kept the stats for he boys team. I hated this guys guts…but eventually he won me over. Everything was all good until… my boyfriend decided to break up with me after my mother sent us on an errand to buy new bathroom decor. This ninja acts as if everything is all gravy. We get back to my house, and before we get out the car…he hits me w/ the heee like Missy. Start saying how I’m too good for him, all this mess. The fool clearly used this song as inspiration for this little speech.
I’m crushed.
It’s pouring raining, I offer to take him home. He says declines.
A few days later I end up telling him that I didn’t want to go prom with him (we initially agreed we’d still go). He says okay, and once we start speaking..tells me he’s taking a girl from a neighboring high school……..
He shows up at the “showcase” with my friend who is his prom date and now probably the mother of his 1st child.
I can’t listen to that damn song til this day. I may have “lost” that day…but I win today. He looks about 5 months pregnant, has 3 and a possible kids (all different baby mothers), and still wants me.
@La Bakir,
That is crazy. As soon as I posted mine, I just saw that you posted yours and it was for the same song. That damn song f**ked a lot of people’s heads up back in the day.
@La Bakir,
love it. my first bf broke up with me to that song… and we got back together and broke up numerous times over six years. our final breakup was ugly and hurtful. but that was five years ago. now, he’s been married and divorced, still confesses love for me, and is a janitor at the school i’m getting my MFA at. bwahaha. (nttawwt).
@Muze,
LOL…Muze for the win!!!
@Muze,
Man, Karma can be a bitch.
@ComicBookGuy,
Sure can! Ol’ boy stay asking me “When you gonna take me out on a date?” I mean the question itself is a little dumb, shouldn’t he be asking me out b/c he clearly wants to spend time with me.
@Muze,
“now, he’s been married and divorced, still confesses love for me, and is a janitor at the school i’m getting my MFA at. bwahaha. (nttawwt).”
Damn. Sucks to be him. What did he say when you saw him at the school?
@Humble_One,
lol he asked me on a date. blech. i can’t even imagine.
@Muze,
Win at the buzzer! LMFAO!! Karma is def a b**ch…
Bond.
@La Bakir,
LOL @ “he hits me w/ the heee like Missy” yall are killin me today.
but for serious, i feel your pain. negros can be so triflin. and so unoriginal with the song-inspired breakups/makeups
@La Bakir, its funny how in high school when someone breaks up with you it can seem like the worst thing ever. then years later, you reflect or you see them and you’re so glad things didn’t work out.
@Tunde, Yeah, man…b/c at that point in time…it was like my world ended. But you are sooooo right…glad things happened the way they did.
The Scientist — Coldplay (if you don’t know, now you know… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tmjPrdTNxQ0 )
HomeyLoverFriend in undergrad. I wanted him more than he ever knew. I wanted him for more than what we were doing. Even though I dated other people, I still wanted him. He burned this cd (A Rush of Blood to the Head) for me after our last night together. After graduation, he called, and we talked briefly. Then I popped in this cd, and went straight to The Scientist. And cried, thinking how I wished I had told him how I really felt. He was really a good guy, treated me with honor and respect.
This song hasn’t been ruined for me because I love this song. But it still makes me a little misty eyed after all these years. And whenever I see the video, it’s just a reminder that life is too short to not go after what you want. Luckily for me, I didn’t make that mistake twice.
@N.I.A. naturally,
great song. glad its not ruint for you.
but i can def see how this turns from a HAPPY song to a very SAD song. *smh*
@N.I.A. naturally, you know the WHAT IF’s are something I don;t know that I could live with…thats What if’s are the reason why I have taken some chances on some folks that logically I probably shouldn’t have..but I had to know them folks now and then (C)
Ms. Winehouse…so I said all that to say, I am glad you got the lesson, nothing ventured nothing gained, scared money don’t make none LOL etc
Coldplay rocked out on that Haitian Telethon, they hit “the Message” hard….love them too!
Where I Wanna Be by Donell Jones.
A girl I dated my senior year in high school could not stop having feelings for her ex, despite the fact verbally abused and put down a very beautiful girl. He was the one person she could not stand up to and was an asshole to the fullest. He was an athlete that was arrogant as hell and thought he could still control her even after they broke up and she started dating me. I was the nice, sweet guy with glasses, the kind of guy she wasn’t used to dating but knew that she needed to be with. She broke up with me because she wasn’t giving me her all because she mentally could not leave him, despite the fact he wasn’t good for her, just what she was used to. She said every time that song came on when it came out, she cried thinking about me and when I listened to the lyrics and saw that damn video, I saw why. I can’t listen to that song at all 10 years later. She was probably the first woman that was completely out of my league that I dated and first time I had the balls to actually to talk to a woman like that. Her mom and all her friends loved me but that is how the ball bounces sometimes.
@ComicBookGuy, *e-hugs*
That album was awesome…I used to play it out. But after that, it got no play from me.
@ComicBookGuy,
aw she sucks.
@ComicBookGuy,
awwww that is unfortunate. but at least she knew herself well enough to admit she wasnt able (or willing) to escape her immediate past. its not easy to admit your hangups. i think its fair she let you go before she damaged you. i respect the honesty.
@Gem of the Ocean,
I respected her honesty about it. I guess for me it was like a big deal for me because she was such a pretty girl and I felt like that it was I could do at the time, especially when I knew I was about to graduate and go to an HBCU and I knew a brotha was about to get no play in college.
@ComicBookGuy,
well breakups are never easy, esp when you’re young. the sting is worse with adolescence. with maturity comes an appreciation for nice guys with glasses
@Gem of the Ocean,
with maturity comes an appreciation for nice guys with glasses
You just made my day with that one.
I was 22 and had just graduated from college. I had my own apartment and was feeling kinda grown. A “friend” from school who had been crushing on me since freshman year had all of a sudden became cute to me since I was finally over the “relationship” with my highschool sweetheart that lasted way too long.* Anywho, dude from college and I had kept in touch after graduation and I went to a cookout at his uncle’s house for the 4th of July. I guess we only had one mix CD because about ever 45 minutes or so “Beautiful” would play and he’d find me in the crowd and dance and sing the Pharrell parts to me. When I was leaving he asked me to stay over after the party. We hadn’t done anything besides hug and he’d given me forehead kisses–I still hate Taye Diggs and The Best Man for the whole “frontal lobe” nonsense! I had to take my friend home but I promised to come back after his boys left and he tounged me down that I couldn’t not come back even if I’d wanted to.
Anywhoo when I got back after everyone left he poured 2 glasses of white zinfandel and asked me to come in the hot tub with him. I didn’t have a swimsuit so he gave me a wifebeater and gym shorts and turned on the radio and I’ll be damned if Ruff Endz was in the air. It started to rain very lightly (it was like a movie for real) and even though I didn’t want to get my hair wet the combination of the song, the hot tub, his singing, white zin and the Skyy (vodka and malt liquor) I had consumed earlier I couldn’t help myself. We made out for the length of the song under the song and consumated our relationship that night.
Months later I would find out that dude had issues with bipolari disorder and depression, had mommy issues, and (supposedly) was waiting to give oral after he got married. Turns out I ended up being his side chick because his girlfriend got saved and turned celibate. “Fool of Me”
is pretty self-explanatory after that especially since I tried to love that dude, issues and all.
* The highschool sweetheart ruined Always Be My Baby by Mariah Carey because it became evident that he wouldn’t when he broke up with my over the phone via Where I Want to Be by Donnell Jones. Lauryn Hill’s Ex-Factor became our theme.
@AtypicalLibrarian, That forehead kiss is corny as he11. sorry but I wish a nugga would , I’d laugh his corny ass off the block!
@OrangeStar616, Yeah, the forehead kiss is lame in retrospect but in my defense I was 19 when The Best Man came out and ol’ dude was forehead kissing me every chance he got for 3 years!
I just re-read my loooooong post and sorry about my (lack of) proofing. I meant we were kissing under the stars not the song and there is no i at the end of bipolar. I had no idea there was only one n in Donell but I don’t care because his song was a relationship killer!
@AtypicalLibrarian,
wow. yeah i thought the forehead kiss was mad corny too. whoa at all the issues though.
…i’ve been spelling donell’s name wrong since he came out. lol. i knew it was either 2 n’s or 2 L’s, but was too lazy to google. lol. now that’s lazy.
@AtypicalLibrarian, ahh youth, funny the things that worked on/for us then LOL, even the folk we were attracted to @ certain ages SMH….wouldn’t stand a chance now (cue some old school Janet) but thats growth/evolving fo ya.
@OrangeStar616, guess I’m the only one who likes forehead kisses…
@OftenConfused,
I enjoy them as well.
@OftenConfused,
lol yo tambien. ill take a forehead kiss any day.
@OftenConfused, whateva works for you!
I’ll take a kiss on the back on me hand, on the neck, cheek, lips etc LOL but that forehead sh*t does nada for me *kanye shrug*
@OftenConfused,
Nope you are not. I like them. Corny et al.
so, like i assumed… “Where I Wanna Be” by Donell Jones (thank you for spelling his name right ComicBookGuy, lol.. i was wondering) is the song that ruined most of our junior and senior years of high school.
there was a whole twitter conversation about that song and how it led to the demise of a lot of relationships. lol.
@Muze,
I’m tellin’ ya, I am really surprised Donell Jones had any fans after that song because 1999-2000, that song was like a death kneel for relationships, especially high school relationships.
@ComicBookGuy,
lol exactly the reason why i refuse to associate ‘Here I Stand’ by Usher with any man ever. i LOVE that song. sweetest thing a man can say to a woman… and i refuse to let some mortal ruin it for me. lol
@Muze,
LMAO @ mortal
I like that Usher song too.
Although it can be counted as a break up song…I refuse to let any mortal ruin “Distant Lover” by Marvin Gaye…his passion is so freaking intense that there’s no way this song can make me sad.
@Muze,
Yeah, that “Here I Stand” is off limits to relating to just any ole’ bumpkin.
Love that song.
@ La Bakir
I play “Distant Lover” every other day w/ current baby boy in mind and as mad as I am w/ him this week. He WILL NOT make hate that song. I can’t do w/o my Marvin Gaye.
Eric Roberson’s “Past Paradise” was my song for a former when things ended between us but I love that song so much that I made myself release him from relation w/ that song.
Marvin, Stevie, Donny, Eric Roberson & Frank McComb can not be ruined for me. I just won’t allow it.
@Muze,
I should have definitely been part of that conversation. Donell ruined my 11th grade year.
@Muze,
How many lives has Donell Jones ruined. Sounds like a class action law suit to me.
@Wuyoung Agent of M.E.,
Lol, someone should seriously pursue this. I damn near went the prom solo b/c of this man!
“Differences” by Ginuwine. I was IN LOVE with a dude my freshman year of college, and I knew he was the one. He used to sing this song to me on the phone before we hung up at night, he used to wake me up out of a cold sleep just to tell me he loved me. And then one day, we were talking on the phone, his mom buzzed in on the other line, he thought he’d hung up with me, but something went wrong in cellphoneville that day, and I ended up hearing him and his mom discuss what he was gonna do about his girlfriend and their baby that was on the way.
And umm, I wasn’t pregnant.
Song #2 is “Bed” by J. Holiday. My frat brother was into me, but I’d heard he was a player, and I just wanted to keep it platonic, but he wore my ass down and we started discussing the possibility of dating. At that point, we had only kissed, nothing more. One night we’re in the club, as he was a promoter…”Bed” came on, and he was giving me the eye, singing it to me. I thought hmm, mayhaps a bed is where we need to end up…until I realized, he was also singing it to my soror. FAIL.
@8th Wonder,
“until I realized, he was also singing it to my soror. FAIL.”
Well dayum.
@miss t-lee,
LOL that one spoke to you more than the first story? Man, that boy had me sad for a loooooong time. I still give Ginuwine the side-eye.
@8th Wonder,
no girlie…the first story was truly messed up.
I can’t listen to Ginuwine hardly either. Especially not the S/C version of “Differences”…ugh, sadness.
@miss t-lee,
Yeah, it definitely explained why his momma never liked me though, LOL!
@8th Wonder,
LMAO…yep that would explain it.
@miss t-lee,
well dayum indeed!!!!! *smh* whack @$$ negro!!
@8th Wonder,
“Song #2 is “Bed” by J. Holiday. ”
I was watching an episode of The Game with my ex. It was the one where one of the teammates comes out as ghey and tries to make a move on Malik while that song is playing in the background. To this day, I do the Sideshow Bob shudder whenever I hear that song.
@SouthernCharm,
LOL yeah, that would do it.
SC!! Where you been, my dude?
@8th Wonder,
Been living! LOL… I’ve been lurking, but every now and then I come across a post or comment (or poster) I have to respond to.
@8th Wonder,
“…until I realized, he was also singing it to my soror. FAIL.”
Yeeeaaaah (jeezy voice)!! Y’all prolly had one of those lines with 43 thousand people. People can’t even remember who their LS’s are. But yeah, that’s some typical ninja ish…..
Bond.
@BlkBond,
Ummm, no. There were 8 on my line. I said SOROR, not LINE SISTER.
@8th Wonder,
aight..lol, calm down baby…
Bond.
@BlkBond,
Lol, I’m good now. Wanna hug it out?
Songs & Albums ruint by ninjas:
1. Mary J. Blige “My Life” (makes me pensive, but not utterly hateful)
2. Miles Davis “Kind of Blue” (this was played a lot during a relationship of mine, so it brings back painful flashbacks. unfortunate, because the music is awesome)
3. “Who is Jill Scott” – this album was written with me in mind. i played it incessantly during a pseudo-ship and therefore couldn’t listen to it for years. it recently re-entered my world thanks to Pandora.
4. The Miseducation of Lauren Hill – I still have a hard time listening to this album, but the matrix has figured out a way to add this to my pandora suggestions as well.
My stories are probably too somber for vsb, so I’ll keep the details to myself. But, I will say this- music holds some powerful memories. So, I try to keep it silent when I’m dating anyone new. lol
@Miss Patterson,
….have we dated? Wow…lol. Sometimes I marvel at the fact that so many people in different places, different ages, etc. can share the same experiences.
Bond.
@BlkBond, i hope we haven’t dated, cuz then i’d have to e-quit you on vsb for ruining so much good music.
the similarities among the stories are haunting though, i agree. and here i thought i was holding back to spare the readers…shooooot.
damn son. that’s cold game. i really don’t know how i would have reacted.
a song that was ruined for me is usher’s burn off the confessions album. year is 2004 and i’m getting ready to move to nashville. my girlfriend and i were getting into mad squabbles. i think it was the fact we were about to enter in a long distance relationship. *shrug* anyway one day on the phone she was doing her best job into trying to irritate me. while my tv was on, the burn video came on. i basically told her to let it burn then told her i wanted to break up. not my brightest moment. if i could go back i don’t think i would have taken that approach. i still would have broke up with her but i think i would have used a little more couth.
@Tunde,
*in Kanye’s voice* How could you be so heartless?
@La Bakir, lol if you knew the circumstances of our relationship you would be asking why was i so nice. lol
Dayum! Way to ruin a song. This reminds me of a surprise wedding anniversary party that I threw for 2 of my close friends last summer. I invited this guy that I was seeing and he surprised me by bringing a date. I was pissed to say the least and didn’t even know why he came because everyone at the party were my friends. It was not cool, especially with my friends coming up to me asking me what was going on and to make it worse, the girl was so plain looking.
Other songs ruined for me (reminds me of ex’s):
So Into You – Tamia. Beautiful song, but reminds me of a guy I was seeing in college and brings back bad memories.
Sweet Lady – Tyrese. A song my college sweetheart sang to me.
I gotta go with Mary J Blige – Real Love circa 1992. It was summer time, the skreets waz hot, met this guy who was in love with this song. It took me sometime but it grew on me and eventually bumped it myself and would always think of him when it played with that stupid grin on my face that you get when you feeling like that.
Him…..I thought he was the one, raised nicely, respected his Mama, treated me good, worked hard, pipe game proper (remains in the top 3 today), what more to ask? How about me opening my freaking love struck eyes and recognizing that he had me and half the female population round about my ways hemmed up. Well, 2 years later, it all came to a head when he moved (without notice) in with his pregnant girlfriend and put a ring on her finger.
Fast forward 2010, they never worked out, he paid child support out the behind, did go on and get married but his wife left him this year for another woman.
I’d have to say it about 2000-2001 that I was able to listen without those feelings of hurt and anger flaring up.
I can’t hear Common’s “The Light” without thinking of the ex. That was our song, dammit!!!! I get a little mad because the song makes me think of him and our 10 year on and off love affair.
Ah well, such is life I guess…
this is a good post! I love the music posts
I don’t really have any songs that have been ruint for me though. I still love them even if things went sour in the relationship. I guess I just love music more than these hoes, lol.
I do remember a time in college I went on a drunk tangent in a party when “I Wish” by Carl Thomas came on and in this tangent I screamed “I wish i never met that mutha f*cka!!!!!” then took a drag of my homegirl’s Newport, and I had never smoked a cig a day in my life. LOL. I can laugh about it now…dude was in the party too, and had the nerve to tell me later–”I can tell you were tore down because I peeped you smoking and I know you don’t smoke cigs.” hmph.
Raheem Devaughn – You
This is a great song. But I don’t care for the memories it brings up. My girlfriend at the time played this in the crib all the time and had it for a ringtone. At the time she was staying with me, not paying her part of the bills, and cheating on me. While that was happening I was working 2 jobs, going to school, and worried about losing my house. So this song just brings up a lot of bad memories.
@Humble_One,
she sucks!
@Humble_One,
wow. that was my ringtone FOREVER! loves that song. too bad it was ruined for you.
@Humble_One,
Mine is Raheem Devaughn’s Love Drug
I can still listen to that song because I really like it. Every now and then I think about ole boy who thought he could actually convince me that he wasn’t seeing someone else. (you can’t fool the kid!)
December 1991. I’m in Memphis for the weekend to visit my favorite Aunt and cousin. My cousin introduced me, by phone, to her friend Stephanie who lived on the other side of town attending Memphis State. Conversation ensues; we hit it off.
The next day, my cousin offers “Hey, let’s go to Stephanie’s.” I’m all excited and thinking that if she looks anything like the photo, it’s gonna be love at first site. We drive across town jamming to Boyz II Men’s “It’s so hard to say goodbye to yesterday”. Not exactly a love song, but I was feeling it. My cousin and I sang it over and over as we went to Stephanie’s. I was on cloud 9 and things couldn’t get better.
We get there and things are good; Stephanie and I were hitting it off. So much so, that my cousin says she’ll be back later as she leaves me there to go visit her boyfriend. I’m there with Stephanie and her roommate and life is good…until the doorbell chimes. Stephanie answers the door, then introduces me to some dude she refers to as her boyfriend. The dude with him is introduced as her roomate’s boyfriend. Stephanie then asks, “when is your cousin coming back?” which she continued to ask every half hour afterwards until my cousin returned 2 hours and 47 minutes later. This was 1991; cellphones were not yet popular and afforadable so no one had one, and I didn’t know my cousin’s boyfriend’s name or number.
Three things ended that day: my cousin’s friendship with Stephanie, my comfort in going somewhere without driving my own car, and my appreciation for the song “it’s so hard to say goodbye to yesterday” (which came on the radio as we drove back home that night).
@Caballeroso,
Damn.
@Caballeroso,
Damn, frat. I have been in many situations similar to that. Looking like an idiot every time.
@Caballeroso,
*smh* damn shame
@Caballeroso, OMG! Serious kill yo’self moment… *ehug*
It took me a long time to reclaim this damn song but I was messing with this fool with beady hair and eyes and really had stooped down below my level in doing so and Jill Scott’s album had just come out. For YEARS, He Loves Me, which he first played for me had to be skipped. The stupidity and embarrassment of the situation couldn’t override the beauty of the song and Jill’s voice.
1. Ready for Love and basically the whole first India Arie CD- 2002
Why??? My ex asked to borrow my CD.. He was AWOL on Valentine’s Day, and come to find out, he had a college chick on-call while I was working two jobs and unable to be all willy nilly.
2. Make Me Better by Fabolous/Ne-Yo – 2007?!?!
Why??? This chick that I thought was my friend was secretly dating guy from #1 that I took back (yeah, I’m SMDH too) and had that as her profile song on MySpace..Sneaky Broad.
@AliLaine4,
I forgot…. R.Kelly’s TP2.com…. The. Whole. CD. Dangerous!
John Legend’s entire first CD was ruined for me. Ugh! My ex-fiance was the reason. That was “our” CD and then two weeks after I moved to be with him in his last year of law school in the ATL (mind you, we’d been dating for 2 years at this point and he was transferring so as his intended wife, we agreed I should come) he said he didn’t want to date anymore. I smashed that damn CD up, put it in a envelope and mailed it to him. I was so hurt.
3 years later, I’m all good and can hear any song from there and jam to it. It took a while though.
Honorary mentions: MomentinLIfe by Musiq for the same damn reason. We used to do road trips and listen to that song and it was one of the few Musiq songs I actually enjoyed.
Kinda off topic: Some good songs to get over a break up are:
1. Alanis Morrissette: You Outta Know
2. Chante Moore: Bitter
3. Usher: You Don’t Have to Call
4. Sade: Love is Stronger than Pride (listen with caution or you’ll be doing the call-n-cry on your ex’s vm)
5. Tweet: Heaven & Always Will
@Mo, Usher: You Don’t Have to Call is the only one I’d do. I love all those songs, but like you said they come with the risk of doing the call-n-cry.
I refuse, lol.
@overit,
Ditto! I tend to gravitate towards hip hop bangers to get over a break up. They get me hype and keep me from dwelling in it.
@Mo,
You make me sick, Ninja
I hate your dog, Ninja
You made me write this song, Ninja
I wish you well but, I’m gonna find another Ninja
Oh Chante…
nough said!
@Lolad,
Aww! This reminds of 2 yrs ago when baby sis and boyfriend broke up and put this song on her Myspace page.
I was proud of her for it
@Mo, What a d!ck!!!
I can add Bey’s “Green Light” – GooOOOOooOOO! LOL
@Yeah…SO!?!, Green light got me through finding out about an old bf’s nuptials obviously not to me.
@Newbie99, ewwwww
@Mo, yeah, the Sade song is a definite NO! I made this mistake with the last break up and I’m pretty sure it significantly prolonged my refractory period. Another one to avoid: Donny Hathaway’s Giving Up. NOBODY should listen to that song in a sad mood.
U2 “I still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For”, well most of the songs from The Joshua Tree. I’m a VSS, but I love U2, and I was ecstatic when I found a VSB who shared my taste in music. When we broke up, he basically said “I just haven;t found what I’m looking for in you”. After two years. So it took a minute before I was able to listen to Bono and Co. without feeling a certain type of way.
@Dee, I LOVE U2 also, saw them in concert early last fall.
@Dee, Don’t let him ruin U2 for you they ROCK, cause for real he evidently wasn;t what you were looking for either
@Miss Patterson, LOL. i def agree though, music is so powerful.
Summer of 2004. A friend decides to tell me he likes me. I think I like him, but am not sure.
I say fuggit, live life or die. (20/20 hindsight tells me ho*, you was right doubt me again and see what happens).
Anywho, I’m really starting to like him. One day we’re kicking it, and just as I’m thinking “I could get used to this”, Wayne Wonder’s ‘No Letting Go’ comes on. I wild out cause it’s my JAM, then this fool goes “That was our song” talking about his ex.
Song. Ruint.
Needless to say, it aint work out.
@overit, poor ovie. and the seeds of overit were planted. d@mn them.
@overit,
rude! you shoulda sang “before i let go” and before you let him go, kicked him in the head.
In my house. In my motherf*cking establishment>>>>>had me weak.
Love by Keyshia Cole is ruint. The ex boo dedicated it to me when i was so in love was filled with fluttering butterflies. After a failed 3 year relationship it only feels me with irritated hornets…and after the break up I realize how annoying Keyshia’s voice is on the damn song
Maxwell’s “Pretty Wings.” When it first came out, my former BF and I were in l-o-v-e. I would always comment that the song was beautiful, but the lyrics were bittersweet. A month later, the lyrics became apropos to describe my BF’s and my breakup. I.e. some “I love you, that’s why I have to let you go” type deal. I haven’t listened to the cd since and will change the station if the song comes on the radio.
I marvel at how so many people at different times, places, ages, etc. can share in the same experiences through music.
Mine:
1. “Slowly, Surely” By Jill Scott–Senior year at Morehouse. At constantly hurting each other, trying to place things back together for the umpteenth time. I had just bought the CD and we had listened to it together up until this song. By the time we made it to my apartment when this song was on we had both shed tears. It was us. It was over.
2. “Suffocate” By J.Holiday–Damn. I just don’t know what went wrong…I can eat injera..damn…that is all…(smh)
3.Where I want to Be by Donnell Jones (album)/ standout tracks: “Think about it”, “Shorty Got Her Eye”, “He won’t hurt you”–Like many have noted, this album is the Love Jones of CD’s. A bittersweet tome of possibilities, regrets, pride, and shame. I can assign each song to a place, person, or thing. This CD is the sountrack from undergrad-the present. Wow Donnell….just WOW.
4. Another Again By John Legend–I traded the first CD with my brother for Jadakiss (ha ha, I got you J). When I heard the line, “..she’s always on my mind/ I can’t let/ her go/ no she’s not the best/ but she’s all that I know..” WOW. I could’ve had a heart attack. That boy as speaking in tongues to ya boy…lol.
5. Trouble by Coldplay–My bad. For real. I truly am sorry. I’d give a piece of me to make it right. That’s all…
6. For You By Kenny Lattimore–Can it be all so simple. We were doing great. typical HS relationship BS. Until your mother’s friend’s 24 yr old son came. You denied it. Until one day after we finished I found a love letter you had intended to sent to him under your bed. I never hurt like that before in my life. And I never have again…
There may be more, these are the standouts.
Bond. BlkBond.
@BlkBond,
Another Again always gets my mind allllll messed up, lol. There’s this one dude, I swear anytime I see him, that song just cues up in my mind.
@8th Wonder,
girrrrrrrrrl me too!!!
@BlkBond, 2. “Suffocate” By J.Holiday–Damn. I just don’t know what went wrong…I can eat injera..damn…that is all…(smh)
ILOL. Injera is the business. was JUST telling my cuz she should meet me for dinner at our favorite spot for some. Woot woot.
I def feel you on the music being a connector, it’s amazing. To quote India Arie “there’s a lesson/in every blessin’/and I’m glad that I knew him at all”…or her:)
@overit, “there’s a lesson/in every blessin’/and I’m glad that I knew him at all”…
Guuurrrrrrllll!
@BlkBond,
How did you get your name to be a link to your blog?
“Another Again” by John Legend is like taking a long, hard look in the damn mirror…*sighs*
@LaBakir,
below your email address there should be a slot for your website. Type in your blog url and it should link.
Bond.
@BlkBond, I see I said….the link for my avatar is there. I suppose a choice needs to be made.
Thanks
@LaBakir,
if your avatar is linked to your email, it should show up with just your email. i have my avatar set up that way and dont have a website
@BlkBond, omg. dude. you just reminded me that love jones is a movie with a companion soundtrack that i can never watch and/or listen to again. talk about planting the seeds of false hope. i swore some ninja was gonna run after me on a train. yeah…no. don’t get me started on Lauryn’s “Sweetest Thing”…I could write my own screenplay to this song. Pandora is the devil, but I finally relented and gave it a thumbs up. my coffee drunk haiku: morehouse breeds snipers/pow! pow! 1996/ damn you maroon tigers
@Miss Patterson,
LOL! today you are comedy. That maroon and white mystique is a mutha
Bond.
@BlkBond,
you went to morehouse?? how did i miss this?? or am i just an amnesiac? either way *spelhouse hugs* yay!
“slowly, surely” is always a friendly reminder of past wrongs done to me, but not ruint. thank goodness, i love that song. it actually makes me feel empowered.
@Gem of the Ocean,
Slowly, Surely is one of my favorite Jilly songs. It was hard to wak away, but it was the right thing to do for my mental health.
And I didn’t know BlkBond was a brother, either. * group hug *
@N.I.A. naturally,
amen to healthy mentality!!
@Gem of the Ocean, how come there ain’t no hugs for clark women and morehouse men? *gives gem & blkbond the side eye*
is it cuz we use pencils and we your girlfriends? anywho. i’m making up my own hug. *clarkhouse hugs*
@Miss Patterson,
heyy… I got madd love for Clark *AUC hug *
@Miss Patterson,
i have love for clark too!! but i already knew yo stankin behind went to clark. but you can have a hug anyway…. *AUC/ spelclark hug* love ya boo (even though you been iggin a sista somethin FIERCE)
@Gem of the Ocean,
Yeah…shout out to mays hall, hubbert hall, white hall, kilgore, fair street….across the way shout out to packard, HH, LLC’s, Manley…all the places I used to frequent…lol
Clark gets much love…at least back then they did (laughs). Clark girls were always getting wifed up…you had to compete against (rapper) and (athlete) but, you could get you one…lol
Bond.
*spelhouse hug*
*clarkhouse hug*
@BlkBond, HU-RHO!
@BlkBond,
lol @ all your shout outs. i didnt frequent many bldgs on morehouse’s campus– i was a good girl. but my morehouse bro was in graves so i was by there to visit during good girl hours. i did have a few late nights in robert, but that was a bad time in my confused college girl life LOL
@BlkBond,
LOL @ you frequenting all the first year dorms
@Gem of the Ocean. Yeah, I had brothas too. mmhmm. Iggin’? I luv you, girl. You back, I see. Next time you go on a social networking hiatus, you make sure you have it approved by my office. *ClarkMan hugs* you like how I switched that up, huh? Spelclark love. yay!
@BlkBond,
yay! i was going to say it but they beat me to it. spelhouse and auc hugs all around!
Heavenly Honey here. (HH hall). we had t-shirts and all. we were flyy. lmbo.
LOL @ saks. i think i may like clarkman better then spelclark. lol love ya boo! and i will make sure i submit my request to you before doing anything that might need permission for living my grown @$$ life!
muze–i was a heavenly honey as well!!! dungeon diva/basement beauty to be exact!!!! HH PHI BETA REPRESENT!! lol
@N.I.A.,
I listed the freshman dorms because that’s all I remember really, lol… The other 3 years are blurred….shoutout to 450 piedmont, wellington point, etc (laughs)
lol, is that better?
Bond.
@BlkBond, Another again seems to be my theme song for ALL relationships. Sigh…I need a new hobby. One that doesn’t include collecting the hearts and minds of my ex’s and tearing them apart like a sick ritual. I know, I know…I’m the black widow! LOL
“Blame It” by Jamie Foxx was my jam!!!! Well, that was until The Incident occured…
After a few months of craziness, in August 2009, he and I stopped dating. A month later, on September 4, he called and told me how much he cared about me, thought about me and missed me. I was speechless (and Meka is never speechless). Because he could not give me what I wanted, I said no thanks.
A week later, I made my biweekly trip to my hometown to hang out with friends. We go to a party where I see HIM. We speak…hug…and then he “quasi” holds my hand (that pinky shit, not a full on handholding). We eventually go our separate ways. Ten minutes later, I see this ninja on the dance floor with this chick…dancing directly in front of me to “Blame It”…less than 5 feet away from me. I could tell that she wasn’t just some random chick either…there was a certain intimacy between them…which contradicted his statement from a week ago that he was not in a relationship or dating seriously. As soon as they get off the dance floor, I’m right behind them. He claimed that she was just someone who’d asked him to dance. I demand to dance. He promises that he’ll be right there in 5 minutes (I know that I had no right to demand it and I don’t care damnit!). Fast forward 15 minutes and I go get his ass. At this point, ya girl turns around and I’m amazed at her complete and utter lack of attractiveness AND that she looks like a dude. I may or may not have said “This, are you serious?” I’m really not sure…and no, I had not been drinking. She eventually asks if there’s a problem and I respond, “It appears that we might need to have a conversation” because there was obvioiusly some overlap in the relationships. I don’t know what got into BoogaWolf but from that point forward, she tried to fight me. (Wrong move.) He begs me to go back across the room to my friends and he’ll come talk to me. He says all that while holding BoogaWolf back. At this point, I’m fittin’ta scrap. He eventually becomes belligerent with me and starts pushing me, which serves to make the situation worse. He pushed me one time too many and I start going upside his head (yeah, I know that was wrong but didn’t care then and don’t really care now). Repeatedly. He’s 6’3″, 275 lbs. But I’m going upside that head. He starts choking me with one hand while holding BoogaWolf back with the other hand. But I’m still f**king that head up. He then rams me back into a wall where he starts slamming me against the wall repeatedly while choking me. But I’m still going upside that mu’f**king head. Finally security comes. He stops choking me but then someone pulls my hair. Since that was a b***h move, I figured BoogaWolf did it (more on that later).
He and I exchange more words. I go get my friends and we go to leave. As we leave, I notice BoogaWolf standing with her friends laughing it up. Remember that hooker pulled my hair? Yeah, I had something for her too. I walk up to her, knock her out. She falls on a table and falls to the floor. She pulled me down with her. For a minute, she and I are on the floor pulling hair. I be damned if I was gonna get kicked out of the club for hair pulling so I start strategizing how I’ma start punching her. We’re standing up at this point. Someone is trying to get our hands of each other’s hair. My hands are all wound up in her weave. But her hands came out of my hair…which opened her up for several blows to the face. They separate us and BoogaWolf made a mistake…this heifer turned her back on me. I said “Oh, I don’t think so” and grabbed her hair and jerked her ass back and proceeded to give her several more blows to the face. They separate us again…and BoogaWolf made the mistake and turned her back on me AGAIN. This time security was on it and started screaming “Get her, get her!” BoogaWolf turned around, saw that I was ready to snatch her up again, and took off running.
At that point, I realized that I just whooped a** throughout the club in a dress sans panties, I told my friend to grab my purse and proceeded to sashay out of the club…until security scooped my a** up, opened the door and sat me out (think the Flinstones’ cat).
Er’time I hear “Blame It”, my right eye starts twitching.
This isn’t the whole story but just a brief summary. I left out the part where, afterwards, she tried to engage me outside the club in front of the police.
@meka, damn…
@meka,
The stories you and ShayD Lady tell never disappoint.
@meka,
Sh*t, girl. That sounds like a story one of my boys would tell me.
@meka, Damn…Perhaps “Blame it” isn’t the appropriate song…uummm, I’m thinking “I Just Hit That Chick w/ a Bottle” might be more fitting…just saying.
Btw, the image of your eye twitiching everytime “Blame It” comes on is hilarious…
@meka,
The security scoop up ala’ Flintstones had me weak. I’m sorry you had to go through that.
@meka,
*so far gone (#nodrake) @ this whole post and subsequent comments. esp.. @ Afrodite.
@meka, You know you were in the wrong, right?
@Penscribe,
*dead*
@8th Wonder,
lmao!!!! i was bout to say the SAME THING!
@meka,
wow. this is def on the list of ish you should let go by age 30. (club fighting) lol.
lmbo @ the eye twitching though.
@meka,
Ms. Meka, you have entertained me for the rest of this month with this story. I always look forward to your comments.
You’re still young, so this is excusable and could be filed under…she hit the wrong button…after 25, this will warrant a side eye lol. We’re just glad ol’girl did not try to harm you, cause folks are crazy.
First time commenting in a LONG time.
PJ this post was hilarious and sad at the same time. I hope you don’t get many invitations to “Anniversary” parties.
Early 2008 I met this dude and the chemistry between us was magical. We bonded on day one. On our first date the bought Raheem DeVaughn’s Love Behind the Melody CD. Minus 1 or 2 songs I was feeling the CD. He titled it “our” album. Fast forward a few months…he receives a phone call from a jump off that he was Jumping Off before he met me. She says she’s pregnant. He wasn’t sure if the baby was his or not….blah, blah, blah. He decides that in the best interest of the chick and the baby that he should be with the chick. I could understand that…doesn’t mean I agreed (or liked it for that matter.) Hell, let me stop fronting, I was crushed. Fast forward a couple more months, she loses the baby. I felt so bad for her…and him. He really wanted a child. So, he comes calling me trying to get back in. I didn’t feel that bad for him. All I could say was, “you made your bed, now lay in it.” He still randomly texts me to this day.
Needless to say, I am now able to listen to that CD without crying. Thanks to his awful amateur rendition, I still have a hard time listening to Customer without getting mad.
@miss t-lee-
One of my friends was more upset that I was fighting in a dress with no drawers on. Lol. Later, she got upset about the fighting and put me on a 2 month club timeout. Heffa kills me!
@meka,
I’d be upset with you too…LMAO
I wouldn’t care about you fighting a broad, but I’d be mad at you for being half nekkid while doing so.
@miss t-lee,
Ain’t nothin wrong w/ fightin nekkid…h&ll, it’d be like watching the female version of ’300′…
In gravelly, base-laden voice:
“SSSppaarTTTannnssss…..”
meka: “Hooorahh”
@DG,
Trust, I can understand why you don’t see anything wrong with it…lmao
@DG,
*nodding and smiling*
@DG, lol @ Spartanssssss. Why did I just have a visual (smh).
Just thought of another one. Can’t believe I forgot it.
Jesse Powell’s “You.” Again, attributed to my ex. He was at my house waiting on me and I had a feeling he was about to propose. “You” came on the radio right as I was pulling up in the driveway and I sat and listened to the whole song thinking about how great my boo was and how this was the song we were going to get married to…Song finished, I got out, walked in my front door and there were candles, music and my boo with a ring. Couldn’t have been happier!
Until 3 weeks later when I found out he was a lyin, cheatin, triflin…ugh! That was in Dec 08. I’m now able to tolerate the song. Which I take as a sign that I have really moved on.
@Ash, this just made me sad. Ugggh men.
@Newbie99,
Don’t be. I thank God every day that I saw the light!
For about two years I didn’t listen to any WU or hip hop, cause of the same dude I mentioned up thread. we had WU/real hip hop in common and it made me miss him even more. something terrible. Still does, but my love for the genre came back skrong last year….I was beefin with hip hop for a minute on top of all that anyway LOL
@OrangeStar616,
I’m sorry that happened. That is just wrong. Not the Wu! I had a fight with my Ex right after the Ghostface Killah concert for trying to push up on another chick right in front of me. It wasn’t even the push-up that did it, it was the fact he tried to bald-face lie to me and act as if I was crazy and didn’t see what I saw and then blame the situation on me. *51/50 blink* Ninja WHUT!? Ninja had me effed up…….
Anywho, that was a still HOT CONCERT. I had a ball at that show, it just didn’t end too well. I feel you, but it can’t kill your love for hip hop. It can’t!
@legitimate_soul, thanks Sis but everything happens for a reason right…….*nods head*…….
ahhhh the classic girl you crazy/lunchin’ technique LOL,
“glad you saw thru dude,
like the you Guru,
what he gone do.
when you start step to dude,
cause when you pay him back
you’ll be hurtin dude
and this ain’t no threat
so take it personal”
LOL ….don’t worry
its all in me, all up n thru me!
I always have a song that at first listen I’ll say “it’s aight” become someone else’s favorite tune in that moment of time. The song varies, but needless to say, whomever latches on to it keeps it on repeat and plays it as though it’s “Thriller.” Quite a few songs have made that list:
– Most things Biggie. (Whorshippers can STFU now). Although Ready to Die saw plenty of play in my Walkman, I can’t tell you how I grew sick of listening to it and anything made by the dead fat fella (accept for Who Shot Ya) because every club, radio, houseparty I went to, they played him out. It was worse when I went to school in Jersey. I would’ve really enjoyed his short career if I didn’t hear him involuntarily.
– “For You” by Kenny Latimore. In college while visiting someone, they played this song over and over. I still gag when hearing it.
There are many others to list but then again, why would I do that if trying to forget them?
@DG,
Would you still support me knowing that I’m a 37 year old tax attorney with a 19 year old daughter?
Plus, I wasn’t completely naked. I had on a dress and shoes.
@meka,
Depends…was your daughter or any co-workers at said party? Was BuggaWolf truly kinda mannish about the face? How short was your dress? All of these are vital bits of information that helps me gauge my desire to see a woman fightin half-nekkid in a club…
That being said, I’m not a fan of violence in general, especially among sistas AND in a public setting. But there’s something strangely arousing about some Zulu-charged tusslin’ going between two women…and since ya’ll don’t seem to get down with the mud/Jello/whip cream wrestlin’ like 2520 women do, we gotta settle for the club throwdowns (9x out of 10, it’s over one of us…go figure).
@DG,
Lol! Neither my daughter or my coworkers were present at the party. Surprisingly, none of my other friends saw the beatdown.
I would love to send you to her FB page. It is such a display of awful lookingness. She even had the audacity to post pics of that night (but pre-incident). I swear to you, she looka likea man. Seriously.
My dress was definitely above the knee but not distatesfully short. Even though I aint have no panties on, Afrodite never made an appearance. I’m a lady.
@meka,
“Even though I aint have no panties on, Afrodite never made an appearance. I’m a lady”
As a man and a fellow 70′s baby, this comment officially made my day. Carry on, Ms. Lady, carry on.
I have two all tied to one dude, here’s my “ruint” songs…
Musiq’s Who Knows & Deborah Cox’s The Morning After… pretty self explanatory, but with a twist… was dating this guy my junior year of college we pretty much did what Deborah’s song says “became more than just friends… after the morning after…” we dated for about 6 months and Musiq’s Who Knows was my ringtone for him b/c he always sang it to me. We had great sex, great company, but there was something about him that just didn’t feel right, had my spidey senses tingling… about 6 months after our tryst ended found out he was having a baby with his ex-gf… and dating a man, *tragedy* Needless to say i immediately got tested & prayed, thanked God we were always extra protected, and removed that song from my itunes…
@Eks M,
*eyes grow wide* gotdamn, gotdamn…dating a man? How did you find out (if you don’t mind me asking)?
@LaBakir, it was crazy… i ended the relationship solely off of suspicion, but saw him with his “friend” in a club in Charlotte, he told me about the baby, but his little tie (remember those around 2004) and the jealous looks from the guy w/ him were confirmation.
@Eks M, girl……I feel you!
But you know what, on the flip there are a WHOLE lot of songs, that are like balms/salve for the pain some I felt were written like the artists had a glimpse into my heart……..I bet your gaydar is on some superhero strength right about now tho
@OrangeStar616,
Girl yes… my gaydar is official, and if ever in doubt i let my gay bf give the final say, lol!
Hey y’all, first time commenter, long time reader. My ruint song is Usher’s “My Boo”. I was at the homecoming dance and danced to it with a guy I sorta kinda liked at the time. Dude couldn’t dance AT ALL and had the nerve to get hard while dancing with me! Don’t get me started on that part! it was ruined because now years later he still remembers that joint and plays it every time he sees me, which unfortunately is a lot since he works at a big-name chain store in my hometown. I’ve moved on, why hasn’t he?!
i’d also like to state for the record your honor,
that my skills at multi-tasking have increased ten-fold since the discovery/addition of VSB in my life. or at least i haven’t gotten fired due to the constant refreshing of my email. lol.
finally, i’d like to address the members of the jury – this post makes me realize that no matter what we go through, the heart is a strong, powerful and resilient thing. cd’s may get smashed to smithereens – but hope springs eternal.
thank you very much.
i heart VSB.
that is all.
I will say this: “Confessions” by Usher is a great song until it happens to you. (sigh)
@RunBabyRun, which side of it…..there are three in that song LOL
@OrangeStar616, Co-signing @RunBabyRun! I was the girlfriend who had to hear the confession back in ’08 ugh! The sad part about it was that when me and him would take road trips the Confessions CD was a staple in the rotation. Now I can’t stand the CD or the single and that was a great album. Confessions is so ruint for me I had forgotten it even existed until today. Damn, damn, damn.
@Keisha Brown, we have a mutual admiration club thing going. Especially your comment about multitasking after discovering VSB. Although most days, I just let work go.
@DG, I aim to please.
@Penscribe, how do you define “wrong?” It was wrong for him to call me with a bunch of lies the week before. It was wrong for him to lie to me on the right with BoogaWolf on the left. So while I might have been wrong to try to knock his head off his shoulders, he had it coming.
And as far as ya girl goes, she got what she came for.
And yes I know it was conduct unbecoming of someone in my profession.
Go to ANY club in tallahassee that has more than a 20% white patronage and EVERY night ends with 2 of three songs. Unfortunately, my mind deliberately doesn’t keep track of enough info to remember names (or enough of lyrics right now to look up a couple), but I start cringing at 1:30am whenever I’m out just because it has gotten ingrained into me.
Even the places here in Pittsburgh that fit the above description play 1 in 3 of those to end the night. The only one I can definitively name now is Bon Jovi’s you give love a bad name.
Why do I hate those songs? Well, imagine the situation. You’re in Tallahassee, in a place where you are probably one of the few people who blend into the dark (or perhaps there were a lot more there and I just didn’t see them due to said reason), it is time to bounce someone out of there at 1:45am and suddenly everyone must stay and dance to Bon Jovi.
There were some nights that as soon as I heard one of those songs, no matter what time it actually was, I’d just walk out and go home. Did not pass go. Did not collect $200. Just home.
Just figured out the second song. Apparently it is ALSO Bon Jovi – Living on a Prayer. Now I’m going to have to stop thinking about this before they end up playing in my head for the rest of the day and I need to go all Elin Woods on my own self.
@kamakula,
Hilarious. In DC, I remember Akinele’s “Put In Your Mouth” as a closer…..
That first Chrisette Michelle album needs to go. Ex-fiance is all I got to say. & the Love Jones movie. College gf Or so I thought she would be… Turned out she didn’t like me. I started to smut out all her friends & then I didn’t. Que Serah
@Muze, didn’t I just say I’m a lady? Lol. Honestly, I think that was my first club fight. I hope it will be my last. My family does like to fight though. My grandmother just stopped fighting about 15 years ago.
Oh and as far as movies that are officially on the “ruint” list – Brown Sugar.
Every damn relationship between two platonic friends who grow to become lovers yet get confused instantly get compared to this movie. For absolutely no reason. I find more comparison in making the Jungle Fever scenes with Halle as a crackhead towards platonic friends than BS.
*in Chris Rock voice* Yeah, I said it! Hell, BS ain’t even that damn good to begin with seeing as it’s just Love & Basketball without the basketball!
@Brando, Word. All of the black romance movies of the late 90s early 00s(?) were the same story. It was basically this:
6 to 8 professional, successful good looking black people (usally a combination of Nia Long, Taye Digs, Sanna Lathan, Morris Chesnut with some others to sprinkle in some variety) + a platonic friendship turned romantic, or a boyfriend/groom-to-be thats afraid of comittment + a trip down memory lane with shenanigans along the way + a wedding and BAM! Box office gold.
In keeping with the song theme, I’d say the movies were “Same Script Different Cast” but most of the time it was the same script same cast.
@Newbie99,
I’m finally at the point where I can laugh at THE INCIDENT. At the time, my nerves were frayed. I didn’t sleep for two days, I didn’t eat for 3 days. It was a mess.
And the silver lining of course: I’m cuter AND I whooped BoogaWolf’s a**. Lol!
“Trapped In The Closet” R-Kelly. Yes, I’ve been trapped in the closet before…
I’m seen all the songs that have been ruint……and while I can now listen to mine, I’d like to introduce 2 songs that since 1986 can still make sneak off to a quiet dark room and boo hoo my little heart out.
Angela Bofill – I Try whoo whoo whoo, the title says it all
Billy Ocean – They’ll Be Sad Songs he aint’ nevah lied
Bonnie Raitt – I Can’t Make You Love Me now that one there is a hard lesson to learn but learnt it must be
What say you all?
Lil Wayne – Mrs. Officer.
Kind of a long and random story … All I’ll say is that “woo ah woo ah woo” part ignites a rage in me that seems supernatural.
@Single Black Male, Hilarious
why am i always at the end of these posts?
Sade’s “Promise” came out in 1985, the same year I met my first love. I’ve never truly been in love since, becuase the overall trauma of this relationship jacked my head up for YEARS. With hindsight I can see the role I played and no longer solely blame him for everything. But please understand this was my first love and I truly loved this man down to the DNA.
To this very day, I cannot listen to the album at all. When I do, it takes me back to the dark place and places me squarely back in the fall of 1985, when I was going to school in Boston and falling in love. I’ve never since been able to play the entire CD.
UGH!! Take off your cool by Andre 3000! And if you can’t tell by my screen name, 3000 is my favorite lyricist. The ex knew this and learned how to play this song and sing it for me on the acoustic guitar. It was fantastic while we were together, but now… completely ruint!
Ummm…I really like “Pretty Wings” despite the fact I had never really drilled down into the words “and $hit (shouts out to the Champ for borrowing the phrase) until after I broke up with my ex. Don’t get me wrong…I knew the song was on some “we had a good time tip and time had come to give it up”…but maybe my problem was that I didn’t realize that until hindsight!
D@mn you hindsight!!!! LOL!
Whew, I might need to call my therapist after just reading this. I only have one and it’s not because of a relationship. I am a HUGE Jacksons fan. Back when Jermaine was jammin “Lets Get Serious” I was on stalker mode.
UNTIL
Marilyn McCoo sung it with him on Solid Gold. OMG! That woman has scarred me for life!! I have never seen someone burst in on someones song and just F it up like that!! I am getting chills and need to step away from the computer….mommy……
Once, I accidentally shit on my self at work. At the time, Nate Dog’s song “Regulate” was playing on the radio. Now every time I hear that song I just get mad. Almost if it was Nate Dog’s fault. LOL
1st time commenter…love the blog
This post really spoke to me…won’t go into much detail but let’s just say “Confessions (Part II)” just isn’t the same once you get the lyrics sent to you via text :-/ Damn u Ursher!
Norah Jones’s “Come Away with Me” CD.
I love every song on that CD but it breaks my heart to listen to it.
Somewhere in the world, there is a man who knows why.
Can’t stand his azz! lol
But dude, seriously, you don’t hate “Anniversary” and “Sons of Soul”?
I can’t stand you either!
(*snicker*)
Too many to mention. But I guess the one that I am most disappointed about is Jamix Fox’s Superman & Anthony Hamilton’s Cool…
I am young, and never paid much attention to young men because well at this age they are PRIME knuckleheads. However this one in particular manage to slip through the carcks of my career oriented focus and broke me down. He made me the most lovestuck silly little girl anyone could possibly think of. He was my equal and my opposite at the same time, we both complemented each other very well. At any rate.. we were both singers, and on some nights he would sing me to sleep (as I have HORRIBLE insomnia) and it was these two songs that he sang most frequently. Both really great songs but we have since broken up, and well I cringe at listening to either song…
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i just started reading website so im late but had to say something on this one the song that is totally ruined for me is Anthony Hamilton – The Truth…blame that on my failed marriage and im only in my late 20′s lol
lost without you robin thicke
me and the man at the time had it as each other’s ringtone, and then a ‘mutual friend’ put it on her social networking page. i thought nothing of it until i heard his phone ring and the song played….when she called….needless to say things went downhill faster than a chevy with no brakes….can’t even listen to that song anymore!!!