About That Guy At The Theater Who Left His Girlfriend And Infant To Die

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With the exception of both “Kill Bill’s,” “The Dark Knight,” and that time my parents rented “Ghostbusters” and I got so excited that I broke out in hives (Apparently, randomly strange six year olds do turn out to be randomly strange adults), I can’t think of another movie I’ve anticipated more than Quentin Tarantino’s upcoming “Django Unchained.”

I mentioned this fact to a friend (“John”) a week or so ago, and after a passive-aggressively condescending debate about whether Tarantino is overrated, the subject shifted to slavery.

“Man, I would have escaped, or they would have had to kill me,” he stated. “I barely tolerate taking orders from the executive VP at work. What I look like being another man’s slave?”

“You just bought a juicer,” I jokingly reminded him. “No way your post-racial ass would have navigated the Underground Railroad.”

The conversation shifted again soon after that, but the quickness and sheer certainty of John’s reply when stating that he’d never allow anyone to enslave him stayed with me. It reminded me of the time I used Maus in an 12th grade English class I taught, and how many of the students remarked that they either would have escaped the concentration camps or died trying. It also harkened back to the time shortly after 9/11 when people started to question how planes full of dozens of people allowed a couple guys with beards and box cutters to hijack, kidnap, and eventually murder everyone on board.

And, whenever I hear people making those types of statements, the same thought goes through my head:

“You have no f*cking idea what you would have done”

Not wanting to start an argument about something that can never actually be proven, I usually keep that thought to myself. But, the fact remains that unless you’ve actually been in a life or death situation before, you really have no idea how you’d react. You think you know and you want to believe your fight instinct would override your flight, but unless they’ve felt actual pressure, none of us know exactly how strong our pipes actually are.

So, while the rest of the country has gone in on Jamie Rohrs, the guy who left his girlfriend, her four year old daughter, and their infant son behind while he escaped the shooting at the “Dark Night Rises” premiere in Aurora, Colorado, I’m (somewhat) sympathetic towards him.

Don’t get me wrong. I do believe that he deserves every bit of criticism coming his way — and I also believe his fiancee must have drank a potent glass of “Shit, this guy is the best I can do” juice in order to accept his marriage proposal. Leaving your girl, your girl’s kid, and your own freakin infant to somehow protect themselves from a crazed gunman is about as bitch-ass as a person can get.

(Seriously, can you imagine how bad their sex is going to be from now on? I can totally see him saying something like “Whose p*ssy is this?” and her responding “Go hide in a closet you scary motherf*cker”)

But, I wonder how many of us would have responded in the same way, and my sympathy comes from the fact that he has to live the rest of his life knowing that when life gave him a lemon, he truly did say “F*ck the lemons” and bailed.

Obviously — as the men who died in that theater while shielding loved ones proves — there are many of us who’d do the noble thing, the heroic thing if placed in that situation. I believe that I would have too. I believe that I’d sacrifice my own life to save a loved one. I believe that I would have attempted to stop the 9/11 hijackers, that I wouldn’t have allowed the Germans to take my family to Auschwitz, and that if I were in Joe Paterno’s shoes in 1998, I wouldn’t have hesitated in alerting the police to my pedophile colleague and close friend.

But, do I know, with 100% certainty, how I would have reacted if placed in any of those situations? No, and I hope to never find out.

—Damon Young (aka “The Champ”)

***If you’re in the DC area this Thursday, make sure to come out to “Myth or Maybe” — a relationship-related discussion hosted by Panama and the homie Rahiel from Urban Cusp***

590 thoughts on “About That Guy At The Theater Who Left His Girlfriend And Infant To Die”

  2. you never know what you’ll do espec when the situation is totally eff’d up-that’s why we stay in the most f*ck’d up relationship

    *stuck*

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    • I would like to think that I would protect mine. I have been in life threatening situations more than once and my instincts have always led me to protect the ones that i’m with. Not in a superhero type fashion, but in a let’s stick together and follow me so we can get the hell outta here type fashion.

      *takes one of the birthday boy’s drinks*

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  3. I will have to agree Champ. You have no idea how you would react in those situations.

    Women want the man who’s going to physically protect her, put his life on the line to save her, fight for her, etc. Those traits usually come at a trade off for other things women find desirable in a man.

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      • And it’s sad when you you really don’t have a choice. What’s worse is that this city is full of people PLAYING gangster with no real clue of what gangster really means.

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        • I know exactly how you feel. My area looks somewhat suburban but really is just a nice spot surrounded by the hood, but all these kids wanna thug it out so hard. I just there like “nygga you just mowed your lawn, you aint gangsta after using a hose to wet the grass”.

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          • Exactly!!! I know gangsters. I know old school g’s. I know real live thugs. Not saying all of that to brag (because really it’s nothing to boast about, it just a circumstance of my upbringing). Just putting it out there to say that I recognize the pretending that these people are out here doing. They’ve got it all wrong. True Gangsters, G’s, and Thugs, weren’t/aren’t all about the bad. These kids sat down and watched a few movies and think they got it. I have more gangsta in my thumbnail than they have in all of their bodies put together.

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      • From movies to football games to robberies to family disputes I’ve been in the line of fire more than I have ever wanted to be (not that I’ve ever wanted to be). I never experienced ANY of that until I got to Memphis. Back home my dad’s name and my family’s reputation kept me shielded from the bs and protected from the ignorance.

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    • yeah I ve had a few “life or death” situations here in the M-Town but never with or concerning my loved one or my child. I only had to think about me and my survival.
      what i can say and remember is that moment that you realize that your life is in fact in danger. there is stillness. fear, and your heart beating so hard in your chest that you cant hear or think and you just move without thought.
      i can understand how he made it to the car. but how he drove off? how he didnt turn back…
      im just thankful and blessed ive never been in that sitaution and i hope to never have to be.

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      • I’ve had my experiences as well, and not in places where these things seem to be common. No, I’m in Germantown, Arlington, Collierville, Cordova, Lakeland, Shelby frickin’ Farms. Places that are suppose to be “upscale and safe.” The last place I ducked and dodged bullets was at my nephew’s Pee Wee football game. Dude got mad because they took his son out of the game. Argued with the coaches, stormed off, next thing you know… yea.

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  5. All I could think about when I heard this story was the Kevin Hart comedy skit where he dropped his baby straight Heisman pose. Luckily the mom and kids did survive.

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  6. I can’t say how I would react either, but I know my first instinct would be to protect my children and husband and I know that my husband’s first reaction would be to ensure we were all safe. This guy had the wherewithal to find his car keys, his truck, and drive the heck off. And then go on TV and tell everyone what he did. A total stranger took the bullet for this man’s girl and the kids – but I digress.

    I just hope he knows that she’ll win most of their arguments with a “You left me (and the kids) to die!”

    Thank God for guys like Jarrell Brooks.

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    • SO glad you brought up brotha Jarrell! The ONLY reason this dude proposed is because he heard that one of the 7 black men in Colorado managed to make their way through the smoke, bullets and screaming to rescue HIS family while sustaining one of those Forrest Gump “million dollar wounds!” lol! For real, as soon as he heard it was a dude named “Jarrell,” all he could think abt was this guy walking downstairs naked every morning for breakfast to rounds of applause from HIS kids and his wife smilin from ear to ear as Black Dynamite plays in the background. And the girlfriend, I truly feel bad for her because she had probably been waitin for Captain Lame-O to propose for a minute and now that he finally does it she’ll have to amend his vows from “til death do us part,” to “till shyte gets real and you break out like a rash.” I will not be surprised if within 2 years they divorce and ol girl starts lookin for some chocolate filling, feel me? lol!

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      • “…now that he finally does it she’ll have to amend his vows from “til death do us part,” to “till shyte gets real and you break out like a rash.”

        LOL

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      • ROFLMBO! I am more shocked that this guy went on TV and TOLD people what he had done. He could’ve at least made something up to make him look like he at least tried to be there for his family. I remember visiting my husband’s old neighborhood in St. Petersburg, FL. and being at his cousin’s house when his cousins got into some drug turf war type stuff (No, we didn’t know the kind of life they were living). At least he had the decency to get us (me and our first baby) into another room and return fire. Unsure why it bothers me that the girl who got shot in the brain received an influx of money – about $90,000- and Jarrell has about just short of $3,000 for saving and taking a bullet for some punk b*%ch’s family. Where’s Tyler Perry when you need him?

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        • Heeeey! St. Pete! That’s my crib lol! From the sounds of it, your husbands old hood is near 9th Street, or on the Southside at the very least lol!

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          • @ C-Real. OMG! How did you guess? My husband was raised on 9th St. S. He’s from Bartlett Park.

            For the longest time, every time I was in St. Pete, I was looking over my shoulder thinking those guys were coming to get revenge on us.

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            • Yeeeea! I went to Bartlett Park (or “Bartley” as we pronounce it here lol!) Summer camp as a youngin. Ain’t nothin changed, it’s still the spot to catch a goodolfashionedpassionateasswhippin or get your shoes coat and hat tooken! We used to scrap though, the young G’s out there these days definitely shoot first and ask questions later.

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              • LOL. It took me the longest time to figure out he was saying Bartlett Park and not “Botley Park” rofl. I also didn’t believe when he told me about hiding behind palm trees when people started shooting and the fact that he was accustomed to gunshots. I’m from South Florida and y’all can have St. Pete, LOL. I don’t know how old you are, but his recollection of the night Joe Waller’s son died was enough to make me not even want to visit his old stomping ground. I told him so. We did anyway and look what happened, lol.

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  8. I totally agree —-we can all speculate about what we would have done in any given situation, but we’ll never be 100% sure unless given the possibility.

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  9. While what you are saying is true…I don’t understand how he can just lay the baby on the ground and leave and then DRIVE off. This fool did not just leave the theater, he drove away from the situation and left his seed on the ground to die. As a person, I can’t feel sympathetic to him. Would you feel sympathetic to him had the kid died? Knowing full well the dad had a chance to save him but chose to leave the child to its own devices….that sickens me. Shout out to the black kid who got shot in the leg saving the fam tho

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    • While you can’t feel sorry for him, you also can’t negate the fact that he is who is he is. Clearly not a strong person. And there are quite a number of people who aren’t strong. We all talk big but put us in the right situation and you won’t hear what people are saying over the screams of terror.

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      • ****he is who is he is. Clearly not a strong person. And there are quite a number of people who aren’t strong. We all talk big but put us in the right situation and you won’t hear what people are saying over the screams of terror.****

        ^^^^a bitter truth to swallow, but a truth nonetheless. I bet if you asked the dude before the shooting if he would die for his family he would have said yes… probably even would have meant it. But when $h!t hits the fan… who and what you are comes out.

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        • True indeed. It’s all good to say what you will do in times of peace, but when the war comes to your front door, chances are most people are hiding in the attic Anne Frank style.

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          • I should amend my statement to say: “When the $h!t hits the fan, PART of who and what you are comes out”

            Few, if any, human beings are all one quality (good, bad, courageous, cowardly,etc). Dude might have other redeeming qualities that might come out in other pivotal life moments. But on that night, in that situation, he was shook.

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            • While this is true, as your actions do not speak of you as a whole, society deems it differently. What you see is what you get, and if you are painted the wrong color, it’s a stigma you can never erase. Harsh and unfair, but that’s the reality regardless.

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  10. How many parents would leave their seed to die like that though? Relationships aside, you just leave your kids and bolt? I’m not a parent but I’m not sure I could be so selfish in regards to leaving my kids in arms way like that.

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    • People leave their kids on a daily basis for dumb shyte, like getting laid or to play bingo. A life or death situation isn’t that surprising to root out who’s truly about loving something or someone more then themselves.

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      • Correction Rewind… not just people… ignorant, uncaring, idiots leave their children. Stupid, abusive, neglectful parents leave their children. “Normal”, loving, caring, you are my legacy parents do not leave their kids to fend for themselves. The number one job of a parent is to protect their children. This guy FAILED the parent test.

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        • Nilla, in my line of work, I’ve even seen those deemed as good parents be absolutely horrible at truly raising their kids. I used to think the ignorant dumb folks were the worst of the worst, but the well to do, I truly love my kids” kind of parents actually do some serious damage to their kids to, like having a complete stranger raise the kid and never be home, being drunk quite often, or just being a natural caunt. So I can’t even make distinctions anymore after what I’ve seen.

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      • I thought not. My parents have never been in a life/death situation with my brother or I, but I know of certain sacrifices they’ve made (are continuing to make) to ensure that we are safe, healthy, educated, relatively happy in life.

        I’m sure that same sacrificial and loving attitude extends to ensuring I live.

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      • I clearly should’ve edited my comment to only include responsible parents who don’t swath their children in COOGI, Polo, and Apple Bottoms when tax free season rolls around

        #thestruggle

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        • I clearly should’ve edited my comment to only include responsible parents who don’t swath their children in COOGI, Polo, and Apple Bottoms when tax free season rolls around

          while in understand that this was a joke
          im not sure i understand what the brand of clothing has to do with being (or not being) responsible parents.

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