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A Leaked Email Exchange Between Drake And Serena Williams About The Engagement Rumor

A couple months ago, our sources were somehow able to find an email conversation between Nicki Minaj and Meek Mill. And then, a couple weeks later, one between Meek Mill and Drake. And then, those same sources found another email conversation, but between Drake and Serena Williams. And then a couple months after that, they found a conversation between President Obama and Kanye West. We have great sources. Our sources are the shit.

And now, they’ve managed to find another conversation between Serena Williams and Drake. But this one addresses the recent rumors of them being engaged.

A condensed version can be found below.

From: Serena@Serena.Serena: To: kingofthewoes@gmail.com: 8:58am

U hear those rumors about us being engaged? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! U didnt start them, did u?

From: kingofthewoes@gmail.com: To: Serena@Serena.Serena: 9:03am

What is a rumor, really? Is it a fact without a face? The truth with no teeth? An honest act without a home? We persecute rumors, like they need to be in prison. But the only prison is the one in our hearts.

Serena, all this rumor talk reminds me of my favorite rumor ever. I was at a Macy’s in Pittsburgh in 2012. Or a McDonalds, I don’t remember, really. What I do remember is that I was standing in line, either waiting to buy some Sperry Docksiders or an Oreo McFlurry, and Amber from College Park came up to me and said she heard that I like to type “Wow, I’m just now seeing this” when replying to old texts. Even though I had already seen it like weeks ago and just didn’t reply. I told her I loved her, and that I wanted to give her the world. And that her grandmother would never have to work overtime again.

And she just looked past me, like I wasn’t standing there being Drake. And then I saw her earpiece, and realized she wasn’t actually talking to me, Drake, but someone else.

And then I got lightheaded. And had to sit down and call my mom. She was like “Who’s this?” And I was like “You know who I am, mom. It’s Drake. The 6 God. Your son.” And she was like “I keep telling you how much I hate calling you Drake, Aubrey. I also hate brussel sprouts. So, for now on, I’m just going to call you Brussel Sprout.” And I was like “That’s fine, mom.” And she was like “Ok, Brussel Sprout. Anyway, why are you calling me?”And I was like “Remember that school year when Kimberly, the new girl from Hamilton, Ontario, started telling everyone I was Eddie Munster? And I used to cry on our patio everyday? And then make snow angels until dusk?” And she was like “I remember, Brussel Sprout. It was because of your widow’s peak.” And I was like “Yes. Yes it was. What did you tell me?” And she was like “I told you that we’re Jewish, so deal with it. And that you need to stop making so many snow angels because you’re ruining the mulch.” And I was like “You told me something else though, didn’t you?” And she was like “Yes I did, Brussel Sprout. I told you that I loved you.”

From: Serena@Serena.Serena: To: kingofthewoes@gmail.com: 10:11am

So u start the rumor or not? Actually, nvrmind. Gotta go to practice. later!

From: kingofthewoes@gmail.com: To: Serena@Serena.Serena: 10:12am

You complete me.

Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a columnist for GQ.com And he's working on a book of essays to be published by Ecco (HarperCollins). Damon is busy. He lives in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes. Reach him at damon@verysmartbrothas.com. Or don't. Whatever.

  • I love your comedic genius.

    • Echo

      Your screen name just gave me something else to giggle about (I need to go on eBay now and see if I can find that movie, lol) other than Drake and his giddy high school girl a$$

      • They have the whole Rudy Ray Moore collection on DVD. Nothing is better/worse than the second Dolemite.

  • Angie Ang

    I love the extent to which Serena remains unbothered in all of these email exchanges with Drake

    • Aye Bee

      Yes!!! Like how he replies back almost instantly and she is so unbothered that she takes an hour to respond. I wonder if when dealing with emails like this you have to become a speed reader to be able to sift through the bs to find the answer you initially asked and instead got a detour into emo town.

  • Echo

    Drake is the epitome of the girl in the relationship with a dude that forget he has a gf unless she is literally standing right next to him

  • ALM247

    “And that her grandmother would never have to work overtime again”.

    Poor grandma….somewhere singing, “I ain’t no ways tired…..”

  • …”cry on the patio and make snow angels until dusk. ”
    Hi-la-ri-ous.

  • I don’t know what Drake is doing in that picture but his homeboy is clearly looking at that @ss.

    If I ever find myself single again, I’m going straight lameness. If it can work for Canadians, dammit, it can work for me.

    • TeeChantel

      Haha. So is that white woman in the b&w

      • She got that shameless one eyebrow up.

  • TeeChantel

    These drake photos are hilarious. He is seriously looking like a creeper boy to me.

  • I hate you lol

    I’m much more interested in this Derek Fisher vs Matt Barnes kerfuffle. This is honestly the most interest I’ve had in the NBA for a very long time.

    • Epsilonicus

      To have been a witness at that party

      • Brass Tacks

        Did that really happen? I first heard rumblings about it on here. But I took it as a joke.

        • LadyIbaka

          It’s Matt Barnes, so YES.

          • Brass Tacks

            Wow! Over what?

            • Epsilonicus

              Fisher is dating Barnes ex wife

              • Fisher was having a party at Matt Barnes’ house while Matt was 90 minutes away. You don’t have to be Taraji to pop up to that mess.

                • LadyIbaka

                  He can play, she can’t?

                  • Not at his house, she can’t.

                    • LadyIbaka

                      Their house you mean?

                    • I didn’t know she was in the the league, too. My bad.

                    • LadyIbaka

                      Dude. If I’m with Idris Akuna muthaphakking Elba, his house is our house, his money MY money, the air he breathes becomes all mine too. Lissen…errythang that ninja has or acquires becomes mines, because #breakingpovertycyclebyallmeanspossible

                    • QuirlyGirly

                      I don’t know why, but I crackle each time I see you write “Idris Akuna muthaphakking Elba”.

                    • On second thought, if hooking pro athletes is her talent, who am I to judge. You right, you right.

                    • Lea Thrace

                      disqus is being a bish today. anyway

                      He left HER. In THEIR house that they lived in when they got married. HE filed for divorce. So now she cant move on? And she cant live in the house raising THEIR kids because he makes more money? If it was about HIS house why didnt he ask her to leave? I have no love for money seekers but he knew what he had when he married her. AND he knew what he left when he filed for divorce.

                      In Summary: He’s a bish.

                    • Maybe if it wasn’t Derek Fisher he wouldn’t have went off. Something tells me they weren’t best friends.

                    • He’s a fcuk boy for sure but every adult in this situation is an idiot. Living examples of bad judgement and regret.

                    • miss t-lee

                      In short…lol

              • Brass Tacks

                Wait? Is she the same one that had a similar situation w/ Gilbert Arenas and Shaq?

                • LadyIbaka

                  No that’s her sister LAURA Govan.

                  • So are they like Kardashians or something?

                    • LadyIbaka

                      Manufacturing drama? Na. They don’t make money off this drama. They just get child support checks.

                    • Brass Tacks

                      Man.. I find it amusing how these “ballers” spend all that time and Money energy, trying to get “exotic” and “foreign” wives. Just to end up in aint s hit relationships. The exact reason why Lebron stays winning in my books.

                    • They get a bunch of non-black hoodrats like they don’t know the game.

                    • LadyIbaka

                      #Badbishcontestyouinfirstplace

                    • Yep!

                    • Brass Tacks

                      Exactly. Like because her family is from (insert origin) she’s not predisposed to some hoodlum shizz.

                    • Keisha

                      “The exact reason why Lebron stays winning in my books.”…except for that time he hopped on that banana boat…lol. That picture is cemented in my brain for some reason.

                    • Brass Tacks

                      The banana boat was a total miscalculation on his part. I personally would have hired someone to hem up the photographer. But that’s just me.

                    • Banana boat? ???

                    • Keisha

                      Thanks!

                  • Brass Tacks

                    No way

                    • LadyIbaka

                      Yes way!

                    • QuirlyGirly

                      The NBA is like a small town. Everybody dating everybody..smh

                • Epsilonicus

                  Idk. I did not hear about that situation

                  • Brass Tacks

                    Yea supposedly Shaq was DMing a Govan who was/is married to G. Arenas.

                • I think that’s her sister.

                  • Brass Tacks

                    Man oh Man

              • HeyBooHey

                Estranged wife? Don’t think they’re even divorced yet smh

            • LadyIbaka

              His estranged wife, Gloria Govan.

              • Brass Tacks

                Dam n. D. Fisher dishing out assists to basketball wives now?!

                • LadyIbaka

                  I would never do you like that, BT. Not unless he comes back…

                  • Brass Tacks

                    lol..smh still waiting on an actual photo of you in your avi, lady.

                    • LadyIbaka

                      Continue waiting.

                    • Brass Tacks

                      yup…

          • Matt Barnes is a G. He looks like he knows where to hide a body.

            • LadyIbaka

              He is a woosay to me with a temper.

        • Epsilonicus

          Yup. They really did get into it.

      • Listen, I’d be out here recording the entire thing and selling it to the highest tabloid bidder. I’d make bank!! BANKKKKKKK!!!

        • Epsilonicus

          Worldstar!!!!

    • Lea Thrace

      Why am I JUST now finding out about this?! So much fantastic schadenfreude!

      • LadyIbaka

        Ma sista, all dis big words that look like oversize native. Abeg, trim it down nau. Schadu-what?!?!?!

        • Shadenfraude is a word best left in German. It’s taking delight in other people’s misery.

          • LadyIbaka

            Thank you.

          • “Shadenfraude” is the the perfect word to describe many things German.

        • Lea Thrace

          irira ay??

          • LadyIbaka

            ?!

            • Lea Thrace

              lol. I’m not sure that a direct german to yoruba translation is possible.

      • It is a MESS!!!

    • LadyIbaka

      Just so we know how much of a lightskint g he is, he spit in her face yo and made sure to text his homie that particular fucktoid. #phakkboiswithmonies #lightskintcatsarehotheads
      #heoogly

      • Really????!

        • LadyIbaka

          Yaz.

          • I’m sorry but he’d be dead. I won’t ever allow anyone, no matter how angry, disrespect me like that. Square up. Barnes can’t be more than 160lbs soaking wet.

            • Matt looks like an extra on Breaking Bad. You don’t want to be fighting that dude.

              • I’m 5’2 and by proxy, short people harbor lots of pent up anger. I’d win that fight because my center of gravity is lower and I’m quicker :-)

            • QuirlyGirly

              Oh yeah.. Spitting is so vile and I would have ended his life behind that mess. How do you spit at the mother of your kids..like huh?

    • There’s so many at-risk adults in this situation. The lack of reasoning skills that don’t involve violence is telling.

      • Question, if Barnes and his wife are separated/getting divorced, does it really matter who she decides to date at this juncture in her life? Also, why are you driving 95 miles out of your way to fight? Was he mad the whole 95 miles? Did he listen to DMX for the entire trip?

        • Nah, you gotta go with Lil Jon to be mad for an hour and a half. As to your point, breakups happen in much slower motion than people like to admit. He still got a little healing to do.

          • I remember when she used to be on the Basketball Wives show and she always made it a point to highlight how she was “happily” married and how together her family was. Those are usually the relationships that are doing the worst. If you have to scream it from the mountain tops, you probably pump faking with the best of em.

            • #facts

              And wait… Isn’t that the girl who had her husband recommit to the wedding every year?

              • I was a casual watcher but I wouldn’t be surprised if she was guilty of this. No marriage worth having needs to be validated each year in that way. If that’s the case, why get married in the 1st place?

              • PhlyyPhree

                Nah. That was Jackie Christie, who is surprise,surprise, still married (I think)
                So maybe it works

        • According to Barnes, he only drove like 15 minutes and only went over there after his kids face-timed him saying “mama’s “friend” Derick” was there.” The kids supposedly looked despondent so Daddy Matt to the rescue.

          In my head it doesn’t matter what she does but according to him he was checking on his seeds. My issue was that two of the three adults involved have nice contracts at stake. Yes, they are guaranteed but there’s no need to be stupid. Fish is a foul to me because he’s a coach who is involved with a current player’s wife. That looks a little suspect in the man-law world but the fact that no one thought to use words in the whole situation is telling.

          Barnes has no wiggle room for ish because he was out here with papers on him talking about being familiar with Ri-Ri. Like I said there’s a lot of stupid to go around.

          • Derek is foul but he coaches the Knicks so he probably got more credit in the locker room.

          • I don’t buy the kids angle. Seems like an easy out to explain away much of this situation which 100% involved him being butt hurt about Fisher piping down his ex. It is a d ! c k move on Fisher’s part, I agree to that.

            • No one here was being smart.

              • Since when have people been smart about s e x?

            • Unfortunately this isn’t the first time that’s happened in the NBA. Jason Kidd and Jason Richardson pulled similar D moves in their day.

              • I don’t understand people who willingly enter into relationships with people they don’t intend on staying faithful to. Seems like a waste of time and energy to be out here dipping, dodging and creeping.

                • The stories I’ve seen…. Le sigh.

          • Amber

            I heard Matt also said that they all were friends – Fisher and his wife with Matt and Gloria. So it definitely doesn’t excuse anything cause he basically pulled the my kid called card to go crazy. I do get why there’d be a little confusion and even anger but not enough to fight anyone given everything they all have to lose.

            • Brass Tacks

              Male ego and pride have no standards. Throwing it all away, because of a situation involving a woman. *peeks into various US jail and prison systems*

              • inYOface

                can some please make this headline news! cause (seriously) I don’t think we as professional adults get “it” … really? fight? and there is no way in hadeas that you eeeever gonna get another decent (let alone professional) job – so unless you have invested in Barbie or Coke (the soda) – have several seats!

          • YeaSoh

            Kids know what they be doing… them kids knew he was gonna come over there and start some sh*t lol bad @ss chillren

            • Even if the kids knew how Barnes would react he’s still a 30 something year-old man.

              • YeaSoh

                I’m not excusing it lol

            • Brass Tacks

              “Daddy! Mama and Uncle Derek were playing hide and go seek with us, but we haven’t been able to find them for the past hr.”

              • YeaSoh

                Exactly… “we haven’t been able to find them for the past hr and it smells weird upstairs. I’m so hungry, can you bring me something to eat” lol

                • Brass Tacks

                  Yep. I would probably have shown up to “my house” like oh you can play hide and go seek but cant feed my children?! Errybody that doesn’t share blood with me is getting banged against every inch of my foyer.

                  • YeaSoh

                    Lol… technically it would be hide and go get it

                    • Brass Tacks

                      I was trying to be PG…for the children

                    • YeaSoh

                      The children are the ones tryna get you banged up cause Derek don’t bring gifts when he come thru… smh

        • Brass Tacks

          Because the thought of someone like D. Fisher who was a teammate boinking the mother of his kids makes him feel some type of way. Yea, doesn’t make sense, but kind of does (I don’t have it all the way figured out, at all).

          Doesn’t give him the right to be judge and juror. I mean, he’s outchea trying to play tag with RiRI. But, male ego and all that.

          • The Rihanna thing was hilarious because she quickly dispelled the thought of being romantically involved with him lol Not all athletes are as popular as they’d like to think they are.

            • Brass Tacks

              Ego and Pride, Ruby. Ego and Pride.

        • Andplusalso, this highlights just how much full of it Barnes was about the Rihanna thing a couple months back. He ain’t getting this mad over his soon-to-be ex-wife dealing with Derek Fisher if he’s really out here kicking it and doing all the things with Rihanna.

          • Brass Tacks

            I dont necessarily agree. I know plenty of males supposedly dating other women, yet still side eyeing the mother of their kids situation.

            • WORD. This could very well be an example of bro code in extremis. He could very well be smashing Rihanna and still ready to fight.

              Personally I’m wondering about dudes judgment. Matt Barnes stay around them turnt up types.

            • Supposedly Barnes is dealing with another woman, but I’m talking specifically about Rihanna. Like, if he were in whatever with Rihanna (because Rihanna’s a bad bish), I don’t know if he’s driving however many miles to fight.

              • Brass Tacks

                Disqus keeps eating my post and I didn’t use a “bad” word -smh-

                I don’t know about that. I could be with a “bad b ish”. She’s still not the mother of my kid(s). The mother of my kid(s) is/was a bad b ish so that’s nothing super special anymore.

                As a man, I get how finding out someone you once shared a locker room with, is now dabbing the mother of your kids, would make you want to spend petrol to come see about him.

      • miss t-lee

        “at-risk adults” has me weak right now.

      • Helga G.Pataki

        “at- risk adults” lmao

    • h.h.h. Aka Scrooge McTiger

      Coach Fisher was singing this to homegirl

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaCd5Y9xP3k

      • I wonder if he was smashing while he and Barnes were teammates.

        • Brass Tacks

          Well Then

        • Amber

          I bet Matt was wondering the same thing.

          • The plot thickens!!!! That being said, are Matt’s kids really his?!?!

      • LadyIbaka

        This vid is errythang!! Love it. Will look for it on spotify!!

        • h.h.h. Aka Scrooge McTiger

          The Streets need this! lol

      • I’ve never seen this video but the visuals alone might be even better than the Smang it video (nothing beats that song tho). I love Flynt Flossy. He’s one of my favorite dancing rappers.

      • Brass Tacks

        Did he almost missed the straw at 00:50? I did that once, almost ruined my WHOLE situation. And is Flynt Flossy a real thing? Like, a legitimate thing? I think I seen him on 18th street/Adams Morgan doing the Cat Daddy.

      • JamesInstagram

        Watching this video like…

      • Jennifer

        I still have all of the questions about this video.

  • Keisha

    Hilarious!!! “Serena, all this rumor talk reminds me of my favorite rumor ever.”…was waiting on some awesome story and nothing…lol.

  • LadyIbaka

    “And then I got lightheaded”
    “A fact without a face”
    “We persecute rumors…”

    *SCREAMS*!!!!
    Champ you exercise no sense of common! Keep it up!!

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