1984 and more: how important is spreading the (right) seeds?

ghetto_baby_stroller

two things immediately came to mind when hearing about the chicago high school where one out of every seven female students are pregnant

1. between this and the derrion albert story, i probably should have added “raising a child in chicago” to my list of things every grown man is scared to death of.

2. a conversation i had while visiting with my parents last weekend to wash clothes, go grocery shopping in their freezer, and see how they were doing. it began with the usual pseudo serious ribbing about not settling down or having a family yet that mothers are prone to have with their handsome sons. my dad then interrupted us with some silly non sequitor about one of the women he supervises. apparently this person’s daughter just celebrated her 22nd birthday and already has five children, and, from the way the mother talks about the daughters situation to my dad, each of the kids probably just should have been named “no chance”.

the convo then went in a different direction, as my mom lamented the fact that neither i nor any of my close friends have any children yet, but these fertile hoodrats are popping out kids by the bushel. basically, how will black america prosper if people like you (educated, no records or missing teeth) are waiting longer and longer to maybe get married and maybe have one child while d-block and chardonnay are producing a new seed every 14 months?

although she was half-joking, she brings up a valid point. as much as we love creating blogs, stores selling 8 dollar cupcakes, and internet p*rn, our main purpose here is to procreate and continue the species. if this trend continues, we (the very smart brothas and sistas) will basically make ourselves extinct, or at least so overrun by swarms of oddly-named hood spawn that extinction wouldn’t seem like such a bad idea

anyway, very smart brothas and sistas, how do you feel about this?

do you think that “people like us” are obligated to start having more children, or is this too eerily similar to the “selective engineering” that hitler was in favor of?

and, although this would never, ever, happen, in your heart of hearts, would you be opposed to some 1984 type sh*t? (forcibily enacting the reproductive limitation or mass sterilization of all the d-blocks and chardonnay’s?)

—the champ

  • http://ThinkPrettySmart.typepad.com Ms. Smart

    If Flirtisha’s kids have no chance anyway, aren’t they going to kill each other off?? If the statistics are right, the kids won’t be able to ‘read good’, the boys will go to jail, and the girls will have a rack of kids too. Maybe one kid from each clan will make it out and become a productive member of society. Save for that one kid, the cycle will continue, right? If we get one ‘winner’ kid out of each flock, it should make up for those of us who are careful breeders.

    Also, has your mother been talking to my mother??

    • A-Town Genius

      @Ms. Smart,

      I think all of our mothers must frequent a similar blog called vsb moms or something. I get those same questions at least bi-monthly.

      • Wanjiru

        @A-Town Genius,
        And in addition to the vsm blog, please don’t forget the mailing list now that they’re computer literate as well. I hope my moms never figures out twitter as there goes the last bastion of the childless.

    • http://www.myspace.com/sanen85 SaneN85

      @Ms. Smart, If we really think about it, a large chunk of these men and women (and not just the black ones) continue to reproduce because it is made easier for them by having government resources so readily available and not regulated very well. If they start to outnumber us hard-working, tax-paying citizens, they will begin to cut off the very source that has made it easy to live the life they do. This would (hopefully) inspire those to make changes within themselves and the problem should self-correct. At least, I damn sure hope it does.

      • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

        @SaneN85,

        “it is made easier for them by having government resources so readily available and not regulated very well.”

        I don’t know if you recall but, in 1996 , then President Clinton signed the Personal Responsibility and Work Opportunity Reconciliation Act which basically required welfare recipients to begin work after 2 years of receiving benefits and placed a lifetime limit of five years on benefits.

        Sure, folks can get food stamps and housing vouchers – but that’s just not for people with kids. A single person with no children and no income can get those, too.

        The resources you speak of just aren’t there anymore, not in the same way. If someone is not working and having a boat load of kids, they are struggling and receiving very little in way of federal support.

        And it’s highly regulated. You miss a meeting with a caseworker and you are cut off.

        • http://www.myspace.com/sanen85 SaneN85

          @V.E.G., The Act signed by Bill Clinton definitely made a huge difference, but I have two sisters who have been state supported for upwards of 5 years. One of them has 3 kids and the other has four. One of them has had 2x the number of abortions than she has children and neither are on any birth control of any kind. One of them lives comfortably and the other lives well beyond comfortably. They also support the men that they are currently with.

          This is just the two in my immediate family, I also know many people who have not worked in years and continue to have children while staying on state assistance. I also see this same kind of scenario at the state supported health clinic I work at.

          I am aware of the Personal Responsibility and Work Opportunity Reconciliation Act which basically required welfare recipients to begin work after 2 years of receiving benefits and placed a lifetime limit of five years on benefits. On paper this is how it should work, but with my personal experience, it has done little good for those abusing the system.

          Now, I am not saying that only those with children are on assistance. Nor am I saying that all those using assistance are abusing it. But, I think it’s hard to say that when some are considering their latest unexpected pregnancy, that these resources don’t play a factor. I’ve seen it personally too many times to count. I’m just basing my opinion off of what I see everyday in my community. I cannot comment on what goes on in other communities, but it sounds as if you have a different experience.
          Disclaimer: I am not in any way against state assistance, as I said I work at a clinic supported by the state. I was also heavily supported by state assistance growing up, first in foster care, and then with my disabled mother. Obviously, there is a great need for it.

          • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

            @SaneN85,

            I dig. But I think we need to move away from the idea of the ‘welfare queen’ jacking the system. Your sisters are obviously getting over in a big way but that is not at all the norm, anymore.

            Now, if you add in SSI benefits and all that, then we have a very different story. Some very ‘normal’ folks are getting disability payments from the government and are living kinda large on them. But that wasn’t covered under the 1996 act.

          • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

            @SaneN85,

            “One of them has had 2x the number of abortions than she has children and neither are on any birth control of any kind. ”

            Chile, some of my very educated friends have had multiple abortions. So we can’t pin this behavior on the uneducated/hood.

          • http://www.museacdonline.com pgh muse

            @SaneN85 and VEG, Your sisters are obviously getting over in a big way but that is not at all the norm, anymore.

            I know a few women who don’t work and have a bunch of kids and I always wonder how they are still doing this considering the time limit…

      • http://ThinkPrettySmart.typepad.com Ms. Smart

        @SaneN85, I made a similar comment over on Sista Tolja’s blog yesterday. That school where there are over 100 knocked up/teen moms are building a nursery across the street from the school. WTF? they could pay off my student loans with that money! I went to school, didn’t get pregnant, and contribute to society. I don’t get anything–not even free health care!

    • http://twitter.com/WuDaMan WuDaMan

      @Ms. Smart,
      I think all our mothers have an internal Grandmother biological clock. I’m just glad I’m not the oldest (i.e. I have a scape goat).

      • http://presidentialtelevisionandfilm.ning.com Monk

        @WuDaMan,

        Lucky you. Even though I am the oldest and my younger sister has already popped out a booger monster, I still get asked the “questions” from my mom.

      • Me fail english?

        @WuDaMan,

        Well what’s my father’s excuse? He’s been ready for me to have kids since I was like 16! (His mom had him when she was 17).

        • http://twitter.com/olivya23 olivya23

          @Me fail english?,

          16? For real?!

          • Me fail english?

            @olivya23,

            Yeah. He was engaged to my mother when he was 16 and one of my sisters got married at 18 so it wouldnt be that weird in my family. Plus he didnt know that I was still a virgin at 16! Hahaha.

        • http://twitter.com/WuDaMan WuDaMan

          @Me fail english?, bwuahahahaha men have clocks too. Lo siento Me Fail! Lo siento

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Ms. Smart,

      Also, has your mother been talking to my mother??

      probably. like a-town said, there’s no reason why they could have their own very smart mother blogs

  • Miss Patterson

    So, let me get this right, the Champ has all of his teeth?

    • SouthernGirl

      @Miss Patterson,

      and he’s handsome?!?!

      • SouthernSole

        @SouthernGirl,

        I thought he was a 3? Color me confused …

        • SouthernGirl

          @SouthernSole,

          lol. *pulls SouthernSole to the side* pj is the 3. champ is his egg shape headed partner in crime. mmmkay?

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Miss Patterson,

      right deez

  • A-Town Genius

    I think that we all know if we are ready to have kids and if you rush and have kids before you’re ready it can lead to us making not very vsb-like decisions.

    • Me fail english?

      @A-Town Genius,

      Really? I think most parents weren’t “ready” when they found out they were pregnant. The VSB-ey among them just rose to the occasion.

      • miss t-lee

        @Me fail english?,
        I believe that if most of our parents would have waited until they were “ready” to have us, most of us wouldn’t be here right now…lol

      • http://twitter.com/Time4SumAkShone AkShone

        @Me fail english?,

        I agree, my mom had just turned 18 and my dad turned 21 two days after I was born.

        Niether of them were in a position for a kid, but they made it work along with a great family support system on both sides.

        I think in alot of these situations the family structure is broken so that support just isn’t there.

        • http://presidentialtelevisionandfilm.ning.com Monk

          @AkShone,

          Yep.

      • A-Town Genius

        @Me fail english?,

        I was speaking more about planning to have kids. I know that we will all step and handle responsibility whenever it comes but if you’re not at a point in your life where you are able to comfortably support a child you shouldn’t plan to have one. If it just happens then it’s time to stand up and take care of your child.

        • Me fail english?

          @A-Town Genius,

          See my thing is I dont think it’s ever (or rarely is) a good time to plan to have a child. Its kinda like marriage in that, when is it a good time to break up half your ish? When is it ideal to spend sleepless nights and exhausting days wiping somebody’s ass? Giving up some large portion of your income for a college fund, doctor’s visits and piano lessons? Giving up damn near all your free time to stay home with Junior to make sure he doesnt burn down the house on a snow day? Being realistic, I dont think there will ever be a time I can “comfortably” do all of this. Unless you’re getting that Slim Helu bread, kids are always a major sacrifice.

          I think our generation overthinks what it means to be “ready”. I agree its smart to have the basics in line (a job with benefits, your own spot with a spare bedroom, etc. ). But by time a lot of folks are “ready” they’re damn near done with their child-bearing years anyhow.

          • A-Town Genius

            @Me fail english?,

            I never thought about it that way kind of makes sense. I just have known several couples who didn’t have a place of their own or even a job and they were trying to have kids. Definitely wasn’t the move

  • http://www.Michelle-Huxtable.com Michelle Huxtable

    I don’t think we need to have more kids. Half the reason people with 14 kids might have some bad ones in the bunch is because the parents are spread too thin. They can’t give all of them the attention kids need. I’m not saying I’m in favor of 1984-ish reproduction limitations but it wouldn’t be the most horrible thing ever if people self-enforced that.

    • http://www.myspace.com/sanen85 SaneN85

      @Michelle Huxtable, I cosign this post.

    • http://lmbao.org Dorian G.

      @Michelle Huxtable and SaneN85,

      Black women lost

      • Sanen85

        @Dorian G., Color me confused. Are you you referring to the mothers in Michelle’s post, or are you calling the two of us black women lost?

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          @Sanen85,

          he’s probably referring to each, lol

          • SaneN85

            @The Champ,
            Refer deez.
            Yeah, I’m still working on that.

  • http://singlesisterspeak.wordpress.com Jaci

    I think if you are ready to have kids then you should. This all sort of reeks of the ‘Talented Tenth’. If you’re a part of it you gotta procreate…then teach your kids what you know then make sure they continue it on…that way there will always be someone there to keep us from falling into foolishness again…

    But does that mean that the lesser kids won’t make good? Like is there room for growth and improvement…?

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Jaci,

      But does that mean that the lesser kids won’t make good? Like is there room for growth and improvement…?

      just like overit’s datebook, there’s always room and sh*t.

    • Mr Blaze

      @Jaci,

      Being a part of the talented tenth prevents you from making the silly decision to have more kids than you can afford. The flip side of that coin states that you won’t even attempt to have ANY children until you think you have the right mate.

      “What is we gone do?”

  • http://singlesisterspeak.wordpress.com Jaci

    :( why am I in moderation?

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Jaci,

      did you pay your dues?

      • Me fail english?

        @The Champ,

        lol

  • Miss Patterson

    i think we would only add to the madness, if we vsbees and esses had kids before we were ready to bring them into the world.

    and yes, i’m opposed to the 1984 approach. a better approach would be to promote safe sex/ sex education/behavioral health among our fertile chardonnays & d-blocks.

    • SouthernGirl

      @Miss Patterson,

      yup.

      i think the problem is a lot of vsb’s and vss’ have that ‘it’s not my problem’ mentality. even if they kicked and scratched their way out of the hood, for every one that reaches back, two more keep it moving. more than anything our young people need guidance.

      as for us very smart people having kids and 1984-type mandates, i don’t think that’s the answer. because kitkatkeisha already has a head start and is ready to drop two for every one we pop out. and if after all of that she still doesn’t have anyone to help her or show her how to make better choices, her gaggle of bebe’s kids are gonna try to jump my kid behind the swing set and then imma have to cut somebody and then it’s gon’ be a thing.

      but all jokes aside…i think our obligation (or at the very least i would hope, our desire) should be to help guide our kids onto better paths than they are currently on. because if we start having kids we’re not ready for (and honestly, that some of us just don’t really want) just to “make up” for their behavior you might end up with some very smart people developing resentment toward their kids. and how is that better than bringing one into the world because you “want someone to love you for you”?

      • Wanjiru

        @SouthernGirl,
        i think the problem is a lot of vsb’s and vss’ have that ‘it’s not my problem’ mentality. even if they kicked and scratched their way out of the hood, for every one that reaches back, two more keep it moving. more than anything our young people need guidance.
        True, true. And I think the challenge is to really, really find your inner reserves to find that thing that makes you go out of your way to reach out to others- especially kids.

        It’s easy to justify not doing anything as I defy any vss or vsb to find a loose, miscellaneous 2 hours a week or $300 that is just there, waiting to be spent on “the community”. Or asking someone who is looking at the very clear and present danger of being laid off, or someone who is trying to get ahead- with all the hassles and drama that entails to find the strength to add another thing to their full plate. T’aint easy. But! Thing is, I think that the world we inherited is built on communal sacrifice of those who went before us. And the world we’re living in right now, needs are people like you, me and yes- Chardonnay to look outside their narrow interests and invest just a little bit (or a whole lot) into making their immediate world a little bit better.

        • MsJay

          @Wanjiru,
          I agree wholeheartedly. It’s easy to point the finger and to feel superior because some of us managed to pull ourselves out (or were lucky enough never to have been in) the “underclass, ghetto, inner city (choose your favorite)” But for most of us it’s a case of “there but for the grace of god, go I.” They fact is – they are all our children and until each of us is willing to make a commitment to be a role model, a mentor, a tutor or to just talk to them (and not about them using words like spawn and hoodrats), we’ll have many more Derrion Alberts.

      • Lil’T

        @SouthernGirl,

        I agree, but only to a point. The sad fact is that most of the kids we would like to help have Ignorance is Bliss Defense Attorneys – their dang parents. I worked in the school system for awhile. Threatening to call a parent will get you laughed out of class. “Call her then – she’ll cuss you out, too!” People are scared to say anything to these kids because the parents back them up 100% on ignorant mess. A mom came into the middle school where I worked a few years ago and cussed out every staff and faculty member including the principal because someone asked her daughter to put a gym shirt over her too-revealing jersey dress.

        • Me fail english?

          @Lil’T,

          Yeah there are the lost causes who just dont wanna be helped, but in my experience there are more parents who are just apathetic or actually encouraging. We cant save em all, but there are def kids who take the guidance and run with it.

        • SouthernGirl

          @Lil’T, i can see what you’re saying, trust me. besides having grown up knowing parents like that myself (not mine but others in the neighborhood), i have a couple of aunts in the school system so i know how it is. but i have to agree with me fail and say that’s not an excuse or reason to not try to do something.

          h3ll, years ago one student set my aunt’s hair on fire. she wasn’t seriously injured thank BBJ and though that’s a serious example and an incident that might have pushed some folk, understandably, out of the door but she’s still in there for the ones that want to be better.

          not all of our parents are that way and neither are the children. no, everyone is not going to respond to your help but that doesn’t mean you stop trying, right? i can’t tell you what your limit is but you have to try. and if one is a complete lost cause you try again with the next one.

          @Wanjiru, yes. aaaaand yes. it can be hard but it’s sooooo worth it. i think some people have a bad impression of what it means to give back and help our children. it’s not always about money. and you might not have a ton of time but make small changes where and when you can. even if it’s one saturday a month or an hour or two a week. that might be the only thing that kid has to look forward to.

          • Me fail english?

            @SouthernGirl,

            Straight up. I started off mentoring but then I got tired of walking to the school (I know, I know). Dont you know my kids kept in contact and started asking me to edit essays, help them find jobs and what not. I really became a big sister and I was happy to be there. Just having convos with them about random stuff while I drove them home from a house party means a lot to some kids.

    • Sula in lalaland

      @Miss Patterson,

      Agreed.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Miss Patterson,

      a better approach would be to promote safe sex/ sex education/behavioral health among our fertile chardonnays & d-blocks.

      hasn’t this already been going on for like 50 years though? sh*t, they’re even offering free sex ed classes at the borders in east liberty on wednesday nights

      • Miss Patterson

        @The Champ, well excuuuuuse me. maybe you should take your baybays and go to one!

  • http://lizburr.com Liz

    Why her name gotta be Chardonnay??? Quit hatin on the ethnically named.

    • Maximillian

      @Liz,

      *snicker*

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @Liz,

      hate on deez

  • drea the educated chick

    i’ll have 14 kids for the cause!

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      @drea the educated chick,

      lemme find out you’re trying to get your own reality show.

      • Me fail english?

        @The Champ,

        If ever there was a woman that made me re-think my stance on forced sterilization it’s that goddamn Octo-mom!

  • bittersweet’s baby

    Hmm. Weighty…must ponder.

    Initial thoughts are: Nothing would make potential baby daddies & baby mamas unite to rise up against injustice quicker than snatching away their opportunity to endure an angst filled 4 days awaiting the less than prompt arrival of uhm (scanning up) Flirtisha’s menses. Followed closely by the realization that this takes away each individual’s accountability. We all know that once outside the womb, it’s the parents’ job to nurture, equip & train up a child in the way he should go… but why wouldn’t the child also bear some responsibility for their choices into adulthood? Let’s face it, you can be born with the silver spoon, have prototype parents, a Trust Fund awaiting your 21st birthday and STILL be an Eff up!

    But yeah, this is weighty. Must ponder.

    • http://twitter.com/Time4SumAkShone AkShone

      @bittersweet’s baby,

      “Let’s face it, you can be born with the silver spoon, have prototype parents, a Trust Fund awaiting your 21st birthday and STILL be an Eff up!”

      True, but that silver spooned eff up will probably have a lot more chances to get it right than the dude that caught a dope charge when he was 15.

      • http://stickwithyocat.blogspot.com/ V.E.G.

        @AkShone,

        “that silver spooned eff up will probably have a lot more chances to get it right than the dude that caught a dope charge when he was 15.”

        This speaks to societal barriers. The discrepancies in cocaine/crack sentencing in jails, unequal education, all that…can play a part in someone’s station in life.