Dating, Relationships, & Sex, Lists, Race & Politics, Theory & Essay

10 Things You Need To Know If You’re a White Woman Who Wants to Date The Type of Black Man Who’s Only Dated Black Women

***Before reading today’s entry, I just wanted to let everyone know that The VSB Files — Episode 006: It’s The Return…Again” — our latest and greatest podcast — is up and ready for mass consumption. Carry on***

From Jezebel’s “This Goldman Sachs Lady Will Teach You How To Date Black Dudes”:

Meet J.C. Davies! She’s a blogger, former investment banker, and the author of a book about inter-racial dating. In it, she addresses questions including, “Are Jewish men really cheap?” and “Are all Indian men well versed in the Kama Sutra?”

I’ll spare you the rest of the article, but I will answer what I’m sure is the most prominent question on everyone’s mind: No, this article wasn’t cross-posted from The Onion. She really does exist (Her book really exists, too)

Snark aside, although I question Davies’ sincerity (and, well, sanity) her book’s latent premise — people of different cultures and races have different dating patterns — isn’t incorrect. While I’m aware that each individual person is like a giant snowflake — complex, unique, and full of holes — it would be completely disingenuous not to admit that certain trends and characteristics are common with certain people.

My own experience has taught me that black women hate when raccoons get in their hair, club-hopping white women usually smell like Gap body spray and white privilege, and Pittsburgh-area Jews, well, I’m still not completely clear why Jewish people have their own separate category from regular ol’ non-Jewish whites. I know a bunch of Jewish men and women, and they aint all that special.

Anyway, I was feeling particularly altruistic yesterday, so I decided to help Davies out. But, since I can’t really speak for black men who regularly date outside of their race, instead I decided to give her — and any other non-black woman interested in dating a black man who’s never dated a white woman before — some insight about us.

1. Don’t try to impress us with your “down-ness”

When we’re with you, we want the full “white” experience (getting cabs easily, being allowed to pull hair during sex, understanding the appeal of “tipping”, understanding the appeal of Ice-T, etc).

No need to pull out the black and red t-shirts or the Polaroids of Chuck D signing your vinyl copy of “It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back” outside of a Memphis-area Jack in the Box in 1993. If we wanted someone “down” we’d still be with the mothers of our children.

2. You might think it’s cool, but it’s never a good idea to use racial epithets during sex

First, it’s degrading and demeaning. But, more importantly, our neighbors are likely to call the cops if they hear a distressed and high-pitched scream of “Don’t stab me with that jungle spear, you f*cking nigger!!!” coming from our apartments.

3. Don’t try to kiss us right after we just saw you French kiss your basset hound

While we love our pets as much as you do, kissing them is a bit much. What we really don’t understand is how the hell are you going to teach your dogs how to maul your infant nephews and nieces if you spend all that time actually being nice to them?

4. Don’t tell us about your Greek, Italian, or Irish ancestry

We don’t care, and it’ll remind us of the fact that the only way most of us can trace our ancestry is if we wrote “Our Ancestry” on top of some carbon paper and traced around it with a number two pencil.

5. We don’t like to be “surprised” by ultra-white whiteness

Put it this way: While regular, garden-variety whiteness is cool, “surprising” us with weekend trips to the Ozarks to meet your sister-cousins when we thought we were just going to Six Flags is totally uncool, and you need to do your very best to make sure you inform us of any possible engagement with ultra-white whiteness at least 4-6 months beforehand. Sh*t, we wouldn’t take you to the hood unless we gave you at least 4 to 6 months advance notice to get your passport, flu shots, and permission slips in order, so don’t think it’s cool and cute to “accidentally” miss a couple exits while driving to Seven Springs and end up deep in Appalachia.

6. If we’re out together and we ever happen upon a group of black women, don’t be surprised if we act like you have rabies for the next 5 to 15 minutes

As great as our relationship might currently be, if it ever ends — and we actually want to date a black woman again — we can’t chance getting branded with the “He dates white women” scarlet letter.

Basically, if we’re out together somewhere and they see us, just pretend you’re one of our colleagues or caseworkers. Make sure to always carry an extra clipboard or two around with you just to be safe.

7. If we’re out together and we ever happen upon a group of white cops, don’t be surprised if we act like you have rabies for the next 5 to 15 minutes

As great as our relationship might currently be, if we actually want to live to see another day, we can’t chance getting branded with the “He dates white women” scarlet letter.

Basically, if we’re out together somewhere and they see us, just pretend you’re one of our colleagues or caseworkers. Make sure to always carry an extra clipboard or two around with you just to be safe.

8. Although we won’t think this about you, we’re going to assume all of your girlfriends are easier than southern math

Don’t be surprised when your Facebook friends are perpetually inundated with requests from our friends. It’s a recession, and you can’t pass up a potentially prosperous fellatio pipeline.

9. Each of our penises have special powers

Some can dance and dribble basketballs. Others can sing and knit sweaters. We haven’t quite figured out why God gave us these powers, though, so don’t ask and just enjoy the show.

10. The best way to a black man’s heart is his stomach

But, since mint goulash and boiled chicken breast souffle aren’t exactly what the person who coined that cliche had in mind, in your case, the best way to black man’s heart is probably your wallet.

Men of VSB, did I miss anything?

Also, ladies, is there anything you’d like to tell a white man who wants to date a black woman who usually dates black men?

Lastly, I know we have quite a few non-black visitors. Is there anything you’d like to tell a black person interested in dating you, or any other non-black person, about you?

***Again, please don’t forget to check out The VSB Files — Episode 006: It’s The Return…Again” — our latest and greatest podcast***

—The Champ

Damon Young

Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of VSB. He is also a contributing editor for EBONY.com. He resides in Pittsburgh, and he really likes pancakes.

  • Yonnie 3000

    What does white privilege smell like?

    • http://wewereninjas.wordpress.com/ Jay

      If I were to guess I’d say some combination of blueberry scones, Herbal Essence shampoo, and sea salt.

      • Stylez G. Write

        It smells like lemons and lemon furniture polish-wonderful!

    • http://twitter.com/coltranesnaima TheTalentedMs.Fiasco

      Chopped cedar wood.

      • http://iamyourpeople.com/ I Am Your People

        Good credit and parsnips

        • legitimate_soul

          “What the f@ck is a parsnip?”-Dave Chapelle Show, Trading Spouses sketch.

          ^Sorry, I couldn’t resist, lol!

          • http://www.djonespoet.com david

            isn’t a parsnip just a white carrot, when they both want to be beets…

            • Mr. Charlie

              I know as a white father of a petite blond daughter nothing would make me prouder than for her to bring a nice dark colored boy home.
              They sure know how to pick a nice watermellon.

    • DG

      Like that scent in all Abercrombie & Fitch stores….

      Either that, or just plain wet dog smell…

      • HR_Maggedon

        wait, that smell coming out of A&F is NOT wet dog… i thought they were the same….

        damn you, cruel world.

      • http://eatreadrant-nadette.blogspot.com Nadette@Eat, Read, Rant!

        “Like that scent in all Abercrombie & Fitch stores….Either that, or just plain wet dog smell…”

        BOOM!

        • http://emdottie.com EmDottie

          [Yo am I the only one that gets a headache when I walk into that store? I don’t even shop there but my friends do, I can’t be there for more than five minutes? Overwhelming ass cologne….]

      • Honeydipp

        LMAO Yes they mostly smell of wet dog, or well dog tounge either way yuck!

    • http://www.pinchmycheekie.wordpress.com Cheekie

      Green bean casserole and unawareness.

      • http://tdlove.wordpress.com Tonya

        *mumbles* I like green bean casserole. With extra onions.

    • Sage of Silence

      That was my first question. But it was literally the first question period.

      I figure it smells like garlic, soap, blood soaked cotton, white linen with holes cut in it and child death. But, I figured I was wrong.

      • oh

        I see what you did there.

    • hehe

      Baloney.

    • WIP

      Bacon and childern’s tears

    • HR_Maggedon

      rush limbaugh and soft scrub with bleach.

    • http://twitter.com/Phidelity15 Phidelity15

      Its smells like a mixture of wet dog, an everything bagel and a dash of elizabeth arden

    • http://thatdamnafrican.wordpress.com/ That Damn African

      Mayonnaise and scotch with Glenn Beck undertones

      • BeBe LaStrange

        SoCo and Baby Oil

        says the White Chick lol

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      this thread is racist

      • truth

        wayyyyyyyy racist. but amazingly, it had so many participants. if there was a blog with responses like this about you, you’d be on the steps of the supreme court by now. ain’t that some shit.

        • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

          actually, if the blog was genuinely funny, i’d retweet it and email it to all of my friends. but, that’s just me

          • truth

            the blog, as in this blog, IS funny. in fact, it brightens my spirits on a steady basis as it distracts me from cubicle world. i just get occassionally concerned about comments. but hey, i guess that’s what it’s here for, right?

          • Red

            White Privilege is racist.

            @Sage of Silence: Indeed. Favorite.

        • MzPW

          Nope. No isht here.

      • http://sleep-is-the-cousin-of-death.blogspot.com/ MadScientist7

        very racist. the white person in me is very offended.

        • kitkat212

          All of you guys are absolutely hilarious! The only thing that can make you racist is ignorance. I live in Alabama and you have to look for prejudice idiots. Grow up! This is an awesome country. You want prejudice people move overseas!

    • Perfect Square

      Cigarettes and blissful ignorance

    • http://n/a embed1

      If you have to ask, you probaby don’t know, but right now it smells like Chanel private label Gardenia.

  • miss t-lee

    Wouldn’t the chick want you to stab her with your jungle spear? *snickering* mint goulash?? *dry heave* oh, and #4 has me just laughing and shaking my head at the same time. Sad but true.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “Wouldn’t the chick want you to stab her with your jungle spear?”

      well, i guess. but sometimes you’ll hear women pull a roberto duran “no mas, no mas” and the jungle spear comment is a variant of that

      • miss t-lee

        Not the Roberto Duran!!! :)

        • http://www.djonespoet.com david

          i have been known to come to a dead stop, withdraw, cleanse myself and leave upon hearing a woman say no more…white women can get a black man into a lot of trouble with that DNA evidence thing…just because she’s mad today, you might have to do time?…nah, better the woman’s blood spill for her callous indifference to the value of my life…

          • http://n/a embed1

            You have a very negative opinion of women. If you actually know any women like this, well I suggest you associate with new ones.

  • http://thatswhatgemsaid.wordpress.com Gem of the Ocean

    When we’re with you, we want the full “white” experience (getting cabs easily, being allowed to pull hair during sex, understanding the appeal of “tipping”, understanding the appeal of Ice-T, etc)… If we wanted someone “down” we’d still be with the mothers of our children.

    CTFU!!!!!! omg i hate you, Champikins *wipes tears from eyes*

    as for #6, i dont think ive ever seen or known a black guy who dated white girls ever be scared of running upon a group of sistas while with their snowbunny. in fact, the men seem to be even more bold, as if daring the sista(s) to say something so they can prove why they dont deal with angry black women *smh*

    • RedLatte

      I’ve witnessed #6 w/Black men dating non-Black (other) women period. What you’ve so eloquently described is what I frequently notice when the brotha is with the non-Black mother of their children. SMH too.

      • http://thatswhatgemsaid.wordpress.com Gem of the Ocean

        hmmm maybe it depends on where you live. in SD (my hometown) and Pgh (my current city of residence) the brothas are bold with their love for 2520 chicks.

        maybe not so much in DC or ATL lol

        • RedLatte

          I think you’re right….in SF Bay Area/Oakland you’ll come across somewhat of a mixed bag.
          I believe that there are some brothas who date, marry have and raise kids with non-Black women because they genuinely love the person they’re with. But there are too many who exclusively date one race or don’t date their own and I can’t help but see that as a reflection of self hate at some level….

          • http://www.djonespoet.com david

            i have never dated a black woman in my life. i am a black man of 57 years. i got branded with the scarlet letter for liking white girls when i was a boy in kentucky, back in the early 60’s…see, everybody wants what they are not supposed to have…white pisnu could cost, and did cost, many a black man his life…as soon as i thought i could safely get at that, i hit it like hank aaron…and all the while i was having thoughts of all the black men who died for doing this or less…and that is when i knew i was really getting away with something, that i had pulled off the heist of the century…black women never seemed interested in me much anyways, ever since i picked up that girl’s books and fought her brother for doing it way back in the 3rd grade…it was like every black woman in the world saw that and now i’m invisible to them, and that’s ok…

        • http://emdottie.com EmDottie

          Yeah in ATL it’s a lil different. Funny shit, I was at the Georgia Dome for the BP3 concert earlier this year. Hov, Trey and Jeezy were the show. Some dude brought his white girlfriend with him. (She was so misplaced it was hilarious.) When my girls and I came by he acted like he didn’t know her. Too bad we were in the row in front of him and she asked us “Who is Young Jeezy?”…

          Dead.

    • legitimate_soul

      I have actually seen both scenarios and dudes try to get at sistah’s while with their white significant other or while still holding her hand. I know it sounds crazy, but I have seen it so many times. I have seen brothas dance with their white girlfriend on the dancefloor and turn their back on her to dance with a black woman dancing with a circle of friends. It’s he!!a disrespectful and I always look at their girl like “you ok with that?” I always wonder if the brothas think it’s okay and that the sistah’s are more likely to roll with it and disrespect the girlfriend just because she’s white. Umm, no. Some sistah’s are just not disrespectful period. Plus, we get a preview of how you treat your girl, so umm, again, no. It’s the wildest thing.

      • Sav

        Yes… I’ve seen that happen as well. Or the dude that brings his non-black s/o to the club, just to leave her sitting at the bar/table while he mingles.

      • http://thatswhatgemsaid.wordpress.com Gem of the Ocean

        i had this happen to me. when i was in high school lol. i was in Vegas with my parents and this dude was breaking his neck to try and get my attention as he held the hand of his 2520 chick. i was so offended. my mom and i joke about it to this day because she saw him doing it.

        all that to say, i agree that these dudes probably think that we’d be more ok with their exploits outside the brown coalition if they showed us theyd still be down to get with us while they’re with their beige babes. uhhhhh no boo boo.

    • Jhane Sez

      “as for #6, i dont think ive ever seen or known a black guy who dated white girls ever be scared of running upon a group of sistas while with their snowbunny.”

      Oh they get hella nervous if they aren’t known for dating non-black and they see a group of sistas and get the “what part of the game is this” look.

      I remember running up on one of my boys dropping off a 2520 chick… they were just about to do the I had a good time good bye kiss… he saw me coming and went from lips to cheek, platonic hug… I expected him to punch her in the arm.

      After she went upstairs he felt the need to explain the context of how they met and while he didn’t specifically ask me not to tell nobody about this… he wouldn’t agree to stop walking with me until I agreed to have a night cap with him to let him know we were still cool.

      No we weren’t dating… and after that whenever we saw each other he got nervous worried about his down pro black image.

      I never snitched… because I really didn’t care…

      But I still wonder if I should have ~JS

      • http://thatswhatgemsaid.wordpress.com Gem of the Ocean

        when you have to explain your “situation” thats when you’re doing too much. either you’re lying or you’re ashamed. both of which make for a bad mate. as Brownstone said–you can spare me all your sorry details.

    • Mimi

      A few years ago, I have gone on vacation (with some friends: all black women) to a hotel resort. While vacationing, my friends and I would spot this guy with his 2520 girlfriend and whenever he would see us, he would (in a subtle manner) PUSH HIS GIRLFRIEND AWAY FROM HIM. And this guy would do it everytime, we would spot each other.
      It had gotten to the point, where my friends and I would guess how far in distance did he push her, as if we were judges from a long-jump competition.

      • http://thatswhatgemsaid.wordpress.com Gem of the Ocean

        wowwwwwwww that is crazy!!! LOL boy would i have loved to have been part of yalls guessing game. that sounds highly entertaining

        • Mimi

          Yeah, it was BANANAS!

          There was one occasion where he pushed his girlfriend a foot away from him, as they waited on line to pay for their meals.

    • Alana

      Oh, I’ve definitely seen this. As a matter of fact, the black guy with the snowbunny pretty much hung his head down as to say, “I know I f’d myself being seen here with her. I’ll just pretend she’s talking to her damn self until black women are no longer around”. Pretty comical if you ask me. Wait, you didn’t. Ah well, still friggin hilarious.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “as for #6, i dont think ive ever seen or known a black guy who dated white girls ever be scared of running upon a group of sistas while with their snowbunny.”

      remember, though, this list is for black guys who don’t usually date white women, not the guys who are completely comfortable with it

      • http://thatswhatgemsaid.wordpress.com Gem of the Ocean

        well like i said, its not something ive ever seen. so apparently i only tend to run into men who are extremely comfortable, and well-practiced, in the art of dating 2520 women.

      • Leila

        I’ve seen that many times. I’ve seen guys push their girl away or walk away pretending not to be together.

    • blackbuttafly

      I live in Toronto and there’s tons of the interracial dating. If you want to see a real “shortage” then you need to see Toronto…anyways

      I was an asian supermarket yesterday and there was this black dude that I kept bumping into. Instead of smiling at me and being cordial, he kept avoiding looking directly at me. It wasn’t until I got to the checkout that I realized why he had been avoiding me. His asian girlfriend was also wondering through the store as well. I guess he thought that he was safe and was weirded out by the fact that there was another black person

      • Leila

        “I live in Toronto and there’s tons of the interracial dating.”

        Same with Seattle. It goes for both men and women.It seems more rare to see a black couple together.

        • marissa

          Girl I’m in seattle and I have heard it said that when blk men move here they get a 2520 woman and cup of coffee. I totally know what you mean. I just get annoyed working in customer service cuz they always look at me like ” OH NO A BLACK WOMAN” and the poor gf will look scared to death. Either that or they act like their ish don’t stank. Weirdos.

      • delicate geniuz

        lol I live in Toronto too and shop at Asian markets were black and Asian people shop. Maybe they were both trying to be strategic. She didn’t want the Asians to see her and he didn’t want the black shoppers to see him.

    • http://sleep-is-the-cousin-of-death.blogspot.com/ MadScientist7

      “as for #6, i dont think ive ever seen or known a black guy who dated white girls ever be scared of running upon a group of sistas while with their snowbunny. in fact, the men seem to be even more bold, as if daring the sista(s) to say something so they can prove why they dont deal with angry black women *smh*”

      went to breakfast sunday and saw this basketball player (assuming he played ball because he was about 6’11 and had on sweatpants) with stingy braids eating with this snowbunny. he looked so proud. lol of course the women i was with commented on the fact he had a white girl on his arm.

      • Mimi

        “…basketball player (assuming he played ball because he was about 6’11 and had on sweatpants)…”

        I d amned near inhaled my straw and choked, when I read this.

    • http://tdlove.wordpress.com Tonya

      ” the men seem to be even more bold, as if daring the sista(s) to say something so they can prove why they dont deal with angry black women *smh*

      Yeah..in Cali ninjas be looking you dead in the eye daring you to say something..

    • http://n/a embed1

      I am a white woman and when my partner and I were dancing and having fun in NOLA, all of a sudden the mood changed and the black ladies suddenly puled their men close and behaved as if they wanted to administer a beat down on me. Really I just wanted to dance.

  • blknchina

    If you are a white man you wants to date any black woman.. do not and I mean never under any circumstances ask her if her cooch taste like watermelon..you will get hit with an empty goose bottle..

    And don’t fetishize too much on the booty..If I wanted a dude to be oilin up my booty for hours and smackin’ it..I’d be more comfortable with a brotha..
    thats all
    kthanksbai

    • http://wewereninjas.wordpress.com/ Jay

      Cmon… let white boys fetishize the booty. As a black man I can tell you that there is NO one out there that fetishizes booty more than I….er we do. Just saying. Fair is fair.

    • http://www.twitter.com/Girlgetalife V.E.G.

      I don’t mine when (certain) brothas spank the booty but I’d def. get offended if a white guy tried. Not sure why…but I would.

      • hehe

        maybe you looked at too many roots miniseries? lol

        Yea I like getting smacked on the ass by my black boyfriend but I don’t think I’ll like it from a white guy. Maybe it something to do with the fact that you need a certain amount of black man swag to pull it off.

      • legitimate_soul

        This whole line of discussion is reminding me of the reverse of this situation with Ronnie paddling folks at that private party scene in “The Playa’s Club”.

        • chocolate milk

          I’m black and I’m proud!!

          • legitimate_soul

            Yesssss @ Chocolate Milk! LOL!

      • Cali

        all I know is WHOEVER I’m dating BETTER smack my azz, its not negotiable!

        • http://www.simplymerenee.wordpress.com simplymerenee

          Co-Muthaeffin-Sign!!!
          The good Lord did not give me all this rotundness for it be left un-smacked!!
          I personally wouldn’t be offended if a white man smacked it, cause I know it’s never gonna happen. I’ll never go near a white penis (they gross me out), which means I’ll never have white man sex.

          • Alos

            Black vag grosses me out.

            • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

              “Black vag grosses me out.”

              me too. this is why i rock blindfolds to bed

            • Strom Thurmand

              Me too

              • http://twitter.com/Phidelity15 Phidelity15

                Meech you need Jesus for this

            • Thomas Jefferson

              Co-Mufuggin Sign

              • NY2VA

                iHatechu Meech LMAO!!!!

              • V Renee

                I am soooo weak. LMAO!

            • Queen Latifah

              I only like the pink ones.

              • Jhane Sez

                @Meech…

                I have a cold and have lost my voice so it hurts to laugh.

                You are killing me ~JS

              • legitimate_soul

                Meech, you made me cackle so hard! LMAO!

        • nocommonsense

          @ cali

          DAMN!!!

        • Ms. My2Cents

          Cosign this to death!!!! LOL

        • Mimi

          Well get ready to clutch your pearls and call me a ‘heathen’ because I agree with you, Cali.

        • ComicBookGuy

          Now that is some sh*t that I like to hear!

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “If you are a white man you wants to date any black woman.. do not and I mean never under any circumstances ask her if her cooch taste like watermelon..you will get hit with an empty goose bottle..”

      what if you’re a black man? can the question ride?

  • fixedwater

    Bonus points if you can be genuinely offensive and genuinely funny at the same time.
    ^^^^let me give it a try, for white men trying to date a black women:
    1. dressing like emimem, will get the o_O: I don’t dress like that hood chick so Ima need you to dress more Capitol Hill than Anacostia (for the non DC familiar: think 1600 Pennsylvania Ave, WDC v. Martin Luther King Ave, any city USA)
    2. under no circumstances should you spank me during the nasty: i know my bottom is plush and inviting and it has you all starry eyed, but no matter how enthusiastically we may be getting it in, this is likely to cause my great, great, great grandmother to be channeled through me and cause me a POW-style flashback and you might get kilt (yes, kilt)
    3. while it may be inviting, do not play in my hair and start asking questions a la “how do you get it to do that”: first i am not a pet, second my hair is versatile. it can do many, many, many things be straighten, curled, and braided. just accepted it as an extension of my own super powers varied and extensive.
    4. let me decide: please refer to #2, to many declarative sentences or demands from you may begin to sound like orders a la “the massa” let’s just avoid the confusion
    5. you better have the good credit we expect you to have: i’m not crossing over for more of the same. i’m just sayin

    • WIP

      “4. let me decide: please refer to #2, to many declarative sentences or demands from you may begin to sound like orders a la “the massa” let’s just avoid the confusion”

      -And I will bring that up during every argument so you will never win.

    • http://emdottie.com EmDottie

      As matter of fact, the only concern you need to have with my hair is how much it costs when you pay for it to get done at the salon. (That just makes me think of the movie Something New when Sanaa Lathan got mad cause ole Buttercream asked about her Remy weave… [We knew it was Remy Sanaa don’t play]…)

      Lmao @ #5….

    • Leila

      “you better have the good credit we expect you to have: i’m not crossing over for more of the same. i’m just sayin”

      Lol!

  • http://hisandhersinks.wordpress.com Ashleigh

    The funniest VSB post I’ve ever read! Not carbon paper! Lawd help me I can’t take it! Did he say “What we really don’t understand is how the hell are you going to teach your dogs how to maul your infant nephews and nieces if you spend all that time actually being nice to them?”

    • WIP

      I think this is the funniest thing I’ve read in a long while.

    • http://dodreamaisha.wordpress.com dodreamaisha

      Due to my detective skills, I know who you is! I don’t know but so many Ashleys with a gh. Hey girl!! Didn’t know you was writing blogs and ish ;-)

  • http://iamyourpeople.com/ I Am Your People

    * Hmmm, does anyone know about the origins of the photo? I’m going to tentatively call it “Prelude to a Lynching.” On that note, shoutout to everyone in South Carolina honoring the 150th anniversary of the secession from the Union. Like Larry Wilmore, I’ll be at the Nat Turner Cotillion

    *”From Jezebel’s “This Goldman Sachs Lady Will Teach You How To Date Black Dudes”:

    Meet J.C. Davies! She’s a blogger, former investment banker, and the author of a book about inter-racial dating. In it, she addresses questions including, “Are Jewish men really cheap?” and “Are all Indian men well versed in the Kama Sutra?””

    Are you sure this isn’t on the Onion? Is there a rich white woman’s version of Baller Alert?

    • hehe

      Hmmm, does anyone know about the origins of the photo? I’m going to tentatively call it “Prelude to a Lynching.”

      Nah I think the little girl is just passing.

      • Mimi

        Chances are those two kids are brother and sister… It might be a part of a photo collection of all of the slaves that that particular 2520 had owned at the time.

    • Yoles

      i’ve seen this picture before somewhere… she’s not passing.. she’s negra… the picture is something like lil negra children or something like that..

    • KingPineNut

      hold up…there’s a pic????????

      after friday…i got some vsbrethren on pic parole.

    • http://uphereoncloud9.wordpress.com/ Wu

      “On that note, shoutout to everyone in South Carolina honoring the 150th anniversary of the secession from the Union. ”

      Is that what today is? S*** I thought it was just another Tuesday. DG and I could have had a VSB SC BBQ or something.

      • DG

        Y’know!?? I’m always down to throw something on the grill, no matter what’s being celebrated…

        Confederate Mem’l Day….we grillin
        SC Secession Anniversary…we grillin
        Alvin Greene Acquittal…we grillin

  • fixedwater

    so how long does moderation last *tapping fingers*

  • simplysope

    OHLAWD, basically I was rolling through this entire thing.

    “It’s a recession, and you can’t pass up a potentially prosperous fellatio pipeline.” #idied

    As far as advice for a white guy:

    Don’t treat me like something you can check off your bucket list. I’m not trying to fill your “F*ck a Black Chick” box, or the “Triple Points if she’s from Africa” bonus points box.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “Don’t treat me like something you can check off your bucket list. I’m not trying to fill your “F*ck a Black Chick” box, or the “Triple Points if she’s from Africa” bonus points box.”

      how exactly does one treat someone like they’re a checklist?

      • simplysope

        With comments like, “You’re the FIRST black chick I’ve ever dated” (unneeded emphasis on first) or when the lady in question is introduced to the rest of said guys friends, they watch her, like she’s a science experiment.

        You’re dating a girl who happens to be black, you shouldn’t treat her as if she is just a prerequisite to something else.

        When any person I am with (friendship, relationship, any ship) makes constant referrals to my ‘blackness’ I get freaked out. Why are we talking about it? The fact that someone feels the need to constantly bring it up, makes me think they have alternate, and sinister reasons (see bonus box) for spending time with me. I mean if the guy is white and I am black, its already obvious enough we aren’t the same, so can we talk/focus on some stuff we have in common?

        Its like being friends with a man and making constant reference to his penis… Hmm maybe that isn’t a good analogy. Okay, being friends with someone who is gay and making constant reference to their sexual orientation, that works better.

  • http://awordorthree.com Crystal Marie

    Very late, but The Champ is back. And he seems a tad bit more offensive than usual.

    Hmm. Not mad about it. Carry on.

    Oh and non-Black men interested in dating Black women should know that: a. Similarly to what the post said, we want you to be you. Not Paul Wall.
    b. Most of us don’t find offensive words like wench, bitch, slut appropriate. Gives us flashbacks to Sally Hemmings days.

    • CNotes

      @Crystal Marie

      “Similarly to what the post said, we want you to be you. Not Paul Wall.”

      Given the fact that most sistas don’t cross over, I think a Paul Wall likeness would not only be preferred, but mandatory.

      • Be On It

        Speak for yourself. I want man in a business suit that doesn’t understand Black American Vernacular, hikes, buys his casual clothes from the Gap, and all the trappings of stereotypical whiteness. And if he’s blond with blue eyes, all the better.

        • CNotes

          @Be On It

          You are not most black women. Let’s start there. Secondly, I made a safe assumption in saying that most sistas don’t cross over. Why? Because they prefer black men and all of their attributes. Although Paul Wall isn’t every woman’s cup of tea, I made reference to him because he arguably has mannerisms that are in line with what most would consider that of a “black man”. Therefore, if the average sista did cross over, she would likely gravitate towards that familiar territory. With that said, your liking blond hair (non-black attribute), blue eyes (non-black attribute) and Gap clothing (Meh…) puts you in the minority when it comes to who sistas prefer to date.

          • http://eloquence-inc.blogspot.com Eloquence, Inc.

            LMAO at this whole conversation but I agree with CNotes.

            To a point.

            When dating or considering dating white men I am first and fastest attracted to the ones with dark hair.

            It’s often the black men coming from little or nothing in life who want to get their hands on a white girlfriend/wife…who make a point to shop where white people shop…and who give off the b-boy good in bed vibe from their rough upbringing (that nearly always involves early involvement with the opposite sex) and pull the MOST amazing amounts of attention from black women who can’t figure out why they can’t get him to put a ring on it! And as far as looks go these are often 9s who “came up” and their socio-economic standing finally matches their looks.

            The guys who grew up “whitewashed” are looking for a black woman (albeit, a classssssy one, getting in short supply these days!) who can give them that reconnection and feeling of credibility. Barack and Michelle for example. However most of them will not find that if they are not into traditionally “black” things (reference one of the posters’ comments about living in a majority white area/school zone/growing up in suburbia)…so they take what’s available.

            Many of the ones with whites (who shy away from commitment to/marriage with black women) are guys who came out of some hood.

            I am open to white men myself although my first preference is not even just any black man…it’s Jamaican men. My own kind. Don’t live near them though so next would be the ones most similar to me in the head…so far that has not been black American men. :(

            • rollitgal

              Jamaican men?..no way, nuff trouble. I’m Caribbean and I love American men and they love me…I’ll even date random white dude before I go Jamaican…my apologies to decent Jamaican men everywhere.

    • http://verysmartbrothas.com The Champ

      “Very late, but The Champ is back. And he seems a tad bit more offensive than usual. ”

      offensive? i prefer hilariously witty and satirical. but, i guess being offensive every once in a while works too. it keeps my hair black